For five years, when I lived in southern Oregon (Ashland, Medford, Grants Pass - but primarily Ashland), I noticed that I had to make an effort, somehow, at growing or cultivating relations with others in the Lesbian community.
As some, or many might know, there's only a hand full of bars in the metro area (or less) where one might find company. But in southern Oregon, at least between 2003-2008, the only place one could find a place to meet others was not at a bar, but at an Lesbian owned B&B (Morning Glory; they serve awesome cuisine) or at the annual Black & White Ball, which was sponsored by Abdill-Ellis/ Lambda which I think this wonderful organization is no longer around, but has been re-invented to provide services in other kinds of ways.
I loved attending the annual winter dance. Blue Lightening played music for the dance, there was a wet bar too, but even in the tiny town of Ashland, southern Oregon is not really .... a place one can feel any wide margin of safety, like in the tiny blue dot of our metro area. Even nowadays, I still don't feel completely at ease because of my own heightened awareness which is probably brought on by how I feel about maintaining my own personal safety.
When I went to the ball, I wore a long black velvet designer dress, which i dont think fit in well with the styles others in the community wore, but people were very nice, hard to get to know, but over tine, during the five years I sent in Ashland, I made some life long friends. In fact, those five years were the best years of my life , over the course of my life time, I would say. Really lovely community, very interesting and highly private people who touched my life with incredible kindness.
Here's a couple of links for others to read about the Abdill-Ellis couple who were strong members of the community, at one time, and the legacy of their vision for the LGBTQ community with special emphasis for the Lesbian community in a very rural location in southern Oregon.
http://m.mailtribune.com/article/20100818/News/8180328
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roxann...ichelle_Abdill