[Starbuck]

I've been a step mom for 12 years now and let me tell you, I have learned a lot!

I learned:
1. I found that as the step parent, I was more strict on my step child than I was my biological son and the bad thing was, they both noticed it. Not cool.

2. You can't change your territorial child's behavior, they're only doing what comes natural to them...loving their parent whom you are now involved with.

3. Patience truly is a virtue and is a great step toward winning their heart to you.

4. Praise your step child for EVERY positive thing you notice or good thing they tell you that they did in school, even for the little things. This will boost their self esteem and their opinion of you You will find this WILL bring you closer.

5. Outlandish grounding for more than a day or two (depending on the age - time out may be more beneficial) is worthless because they forget what they've been grounded for! Seriously! Now if they are teens, taking away a cell phone for just a day sends them into orbit and gets your point across nicely.

6. You have to be willing to say you are sorry when you wrong them. It makes you look more human in their eyes and it teaches them to apologize when they have wronged someone as well.