[Darth Denkay]

Wow, what a great idea for a thread!

I have not been involved in very many online communities. Truth be told including this site I have involved in exactly two. I learned all I know about online communication around these parts.

Communication is hard. I'm a therapist, and when working with individual clients we frequently address how to communicate with a partner, friend, boss. When I work with couples 99% of the time communication is one of the major issues. Basically, I think we suck at communicating.

I grew up having to constantly defend myself to a highly critical father. Do I sometimes feel defensive when it's not warranted - I'm sure I do. I am not comfortable in heated or passionate discussions online. As several have mentioned I rely a great deal on visual cues, and without them I have a very hard time interpreting such threads so generally shy away from them. I do post occasionally but usually only after some deliberation. In person, dialogue, debate, passionate discussions are welcome; online is a very different story for me.

To be frank, because I don't like online communication, I doubt I would be involved in any except that this site provides community that I need. You know, as I write this I realize it's probably sounds negative, but my reality is that I don't like this mode of communication. Of course if I don't like it so much I should just leave, right? But as I said, I value the community so I stick around and participate as feels comfortable.

So, while I'm venting, this venue does favor the outspoken folk. I won't go as far as to say those of us who are quieter are silenced, but our participation, I would venture a guess, is a challenge for many of us. It often feels as though we are expected to "step up" to everyone else's level, but that's an unfair expectation. Of course, it would also be unfair to expect others to "step down" so we are left with a difficult situation, one that may never be resolved.

Wow. It was nice to rant. Thanks for listening - it was good to share.