Quote:
Originally Posted by atomiczombie
I am starting to get worse again. New Year's Eve I was supposed to spend with my daughter, but she sent me a text asking that I not come, because she wanted to spend it alone with her boyfriend. I know its not about me. She is a teenager and just wants to spend all her time with him. First real love for her. I get it. It still hurt me a lot. Then my dad started having heart problems and went in the hospital for 5 days with an arrythmia and congestive heart failure. Now he has to have an operation to have his aortic valve replaced. I am freaked out about it.
Now it's hard to get out of the house again. I have stopped exercising. I am staying in my pajamas all day when I don't go out. When I do leave the house, I shake and stammer and stutter. I feel all jittery and want to just go home. Go home and hide from the world. I don't even want to think of transitioning anymore, its all too overwhelming and scary. This is a hard set back, because I was feeling so good before. So hopeful. Now I am just scared and overwhelmed. And very lonely.
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I'm not a doctor but it sounds like you're in a depression. Have you called your doctor to give you meds or readjust them? I wouldn't about transitioning at right now. That is life changing will require a lot of focus
and decision making. I think it may too much right now. First things first and one thing at time.
Call the doc. Get your meds and get what you need to get adjusted so that you feel better. Okay? And one more thing, you're not alone. Do you have friends you can call? And make sure you're eating right.