Quote:
Originally Posted by imperfect_cupcake
Right... But if you looked at my results you'd think I "wasted" my money on gifts all the time.
I always make my bills, and the gifts I buy are very small. Usually under a tenner. I certainly can't afford to buy any for anyone the last three years but I'd like to. I just can't.
Still, the results suggest I'm frivolous.
I'm probably the most pragmatic of people. I kept a tight rein on household spending when it was sorely needed, for both me and my exwife - I got us both out of debt.
I baked her desserts instead and poured her baths.
But the desire is still there. Just not the capacity.
I've never been with someone who never spent anytjing. I'm always the one trying to get. A better deal, find it cheaper, cut corners, thin the soup. Usually I'm the one people have to have a word with to tell me to relax, stop trying to save them cash - they know their budget better than me. Lol if I get taken out for dinner, and someone else is paying, I'll pick the cheapest item on the menu.
But I'm tagged with generous indulger becauae of my wishes, not my reality.
So perhaps good for a discussion... Maybe not so good for an absolute!
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I wasn't meaning that a magazine quiz would be an end point for a financial discussion, just that something is usually needed as an introduction to the topic. People in western culture tend to have a lot of anxiety around talking about it in anything more than an abstract.
It makes people uncomfortable and frequently defensive, it's one of those hot button topics. Your response is a perfect example. (Not to be personal, you just gave a good sample) the thread was a light game/quiz but as soon as personal examples were used, you seemed to express defensiveness or at least a desire to clarify (correct me if I'm mistaken). Most people, I'm referring to North America, attach judgement to whatever their relative standing to money is, especially when one gets near either extreme end of the spectrum. The closer a person is to 'average' the more comfortable people are around them and the less judgement is attached. We live in a consumer based economy and are barraged with 'good enough' messages tied to financial consumption all day long. It's not that different from things like sex and appearance based judgments but seems to have even stronger taboo signals tied to it.
It's an interesting topic even in the abstract but I do think it's important to have those discussions when getting to know a person in a more intimate way if it looks like it may go in the direction of a relationship. It just seems harder to bring up than other subjects.