April 10
Stumbling Under the Tenth Step
When I’ve been outside of my mind it is so hard to tell when I’ve come home again. The landmarks take on such distortion in memory that the facts seem bloated or anorexic as I turn my face from side to side. Old journals remind me of old journeys and perhaps there are accurate landmarks mentioned, but how can I know for sure that these too are not just the ravings of a mind gone mad. Real or imagined I must take the daily count and try to keep the score in favor of the actual. I don’t always know that I’ve fallen until I inventory the dirt on my face, but better that I face the dirt than live the delusion of a mole.
Notice the shape of your fixtures
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DROWNING NAKED
Bare & Exposed
I laid myself on the alter
Of my home group
AA, my only Source
I emptied the contents of my soul
And bore the mantle of overexposure
But vultures lurked in many rooms
I was safely guided by persons of my gender
To more secluded and effective place of transmission
I thrust myself into the arms and mind of my sponsor
She escorts me to the steps with the door closed
And taught me how and when it could be prudently opened
AA is a power greater than me, so is the ocean
Precaution needs to be taken when wading in
Care must be exercised as to how much to bare.
You are reading selections from More Sober on the Way to Sane and Lines From My Life by Sherrie Theriault
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