In/on my nightstand, are the following items:
A lamp
a Kleenex box
a coaster
a copy of Bureaucracy and Democracy, which helps me sleep
usually a glass of water and whatever earrings I've been wearing that day
the only item I've ever owned made of real fur
a headset for sleeping with the phone on
some Burt's Bees for my lips
and a loaded .38 which I hope I'll never have to use.