[Parker]

As a butch, I'll put my 2 cents in:

I never really cared for it - I just did it for a femme who wanted to do it bc she liked it. Same for packing a softie - never cared for it, just did it bc someone I was dating loved it.

But then, I never really thought of my strap-on cock as an extension of ... well, anything really. It was always just a tool I used for penetration sex with my partner if I was with a woman who enjoyed penetration sex.

I tried to get into it - I did all of the things people in these situations tell you to do in order to somehow connect that cock with my clit, but it never happened and it made me feel less than for a long time - like I wasnt a "real" butch if I didnt like strap-on blow jobs or if my strap-on wasnt an extension of my clit or whatever. It was a real mind fuck and not cool at all.

It took me a while to figure out that even though some like to speak for entire groups, they werent speaking for me and they dont speak for all butches - we are all different and allowed to like, dislike, and connect or not connect to whatever we desire. Same for femmes - some like strap-on BJs and some dont - and if a femme doesnt care for it, it doesnt make her a regular dyke or not a femme (neither of which is an insult btw), it makes her a femme who doesnt care for it.

So if I were your partner, I would love for you to ask me and talk to me about it - see how I felt. Am I just being shy or am I avoiding the topic bc I dont like the idea of it but am afraid of how you might react? Keep in mind she might not like it, but is willing to do it for you. On the other hand, she may think it's hot or kinky and didnt know how to broach the topic with you. You'll never know until you ask.