[Esme nha Maire]

One of the things I discovered only the other month, whilst attempting to help a netfriend sort their head out, is that it's possible to have romantic feelings without lust being involved. We were looking at information on asexuality (for that's what I susepcted my friend might be), and there I came across the information that asexual people sometimes still feel romantic attraction to others, they just don't want to have sex with them.

This rang a bell with me - I can find some guys very sweet and charming - but I'm just not really interested in getting into bed with them. It explained why I was happy enough in the early stages of courting with guys, being wooed, wined and dined, but sex - well, sure, they can do the necessary to physically arouse my body, but I'm just not interested in their bodies. Women on the other hand - woohoo, hell, yes! :-} I want to run my hands over their bodies and have them run theirs over mine... (for starters, ehehe)

I realised, having read the stuff on asexuality, that the reason I'd presumed I was bi (albeit heavily leaning toward women) for some years was because I'd been confusing romantic feelings towards guys with lustful ones. I may well be biromantic, in other words, but I'm quite definitely homosexual - I lust only after women. Sure, I was curious about guys, but having followed my curiosity and experienced 'em... - nah, not for me.

I can't help but wonder how many others - in society in general, not just amongst homosexuals or gender dysphorics - also have a 'romantic' setting that doesn't align exactly with their 'sexual' setting? And could failure to recognise that possibility be at the root of many people's confusions with regard to sexuality?