"Abuela" to 3 here: almost-17, 6.5, and, newborn, all born to my ex's dd and 3 different babydaddies, all druggies with significant criminal histories.
The eldest lived with us on and off for most of her life, and full time for the last couple of years after her momism her job and apartment due to her pain pill addiction. She's a beautiful petite energetic young woman who is a cheerleader and soccer player. So far at least she has responded to her mom's issues by staying very clear (by HER choice) from alcohol, drugs and sex. She and I have always had an arm's length relationship, both because her mom had huge issues with me and my ex's indulgence when I tried to have expectations of her such as chores and homework before texting and tv! I'm thrilled that we have finally bonded over something - we're both roller derby freaks
The 6yo is my heart. I've raised her as her primary parent since she was 20m but when the ex finally moves out next month, all the kids will go with her - I have zero legal rights. She has shown a strong preference for boy thing since she was 18m old and has rejected all girl thing since she was 3 and talks to me all the time about that she's really a boy. Her mom and my ex (grandmom/guardian) have huge issues with it and try to push her towards girl stuff, even though my ex is a TG butch.
The new baby was born July 29 at just 3.5lbs and addicted to methadone.
So... Not your typical grandma story.
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