[Jet]

Originally Posted by purepisces

The past.

I had a long, heartfelt and very painful conversation with my dad today. I love him so much, but his continued support and enabling of my mother has driven a wedge between us over the years. I worry about him all the time, he’s seventy and not in good health. He had his driver’s license taken away a year ago so he is completely dependent on my mother.

I have this terrible fear that he will end up in a “What Ever Happened to Baby Jane” situation. I told him that today, while sobbing in his arms. He chuckled and said not to worry, that if he was unable to take care of himself that he was sure that she would put him in a nursing home. He doesn’t seem worried, so I’m not sure why I am? I told him that it’s hard for me to spend time with them together because of the horrible way she speaks to him. It brings back so many traumatic memories for me.

They’ve been married for forty years and I told him that it breaks my heart knowing that he has been miserable more years than I have been alive. But, he said that he’s happy, mostly. He’s learned to let things roll off his back. He said I need to let go of the past and just thank god that I’m still here.

Letting go. It’s a constant struggle for me, but I am trying. Most days I do pretty well, but today is a bad day and the memories are vivid. Hopefully, tomorrow will be a better day.

Try to let go, remember only the good things and be at peace with them. I'm in a similar situation with my dad, minus the mother figure. Now i appreciate the good things-memories of him