[SoSousMe]

I am very hard to miss in a social situation, until people see My chest, I have not had top surgery yet, so sometimes that's the only clue given off that I am not bio male. And it's saved My butt more than once in public restrooms. It's extremely difficult to travel this earth and not be stared at, talked about, looked at with disdain.

I have been threatened, chased, and damn near accosted in a bathroom by a group of women at a wedding in Atlanta. I was chased out of a small town by a small group of teenage boys, the only reason I did not stand My ground, as was My usual reaction, was because I had My 6 year old son with Me. The clerk at the counter and I made eye contact as she picked up the phone to call the local police, she seemed more scared than I. My son was terrified. I had done nothing more than stand in line with My boy waiting to pay for a pizza.

I have been in more bar brawls than I care to admit, due to rowdy college boys believing I was unaware that I was "some kinda fuckin dyke". I never backed down, until that day with My son. Here in My hometown, I was the first out "lesbian", and over the years, this town has become quite the little queer friendly place to live. But back then it was not nearly as accepting. It is when I go out of town where I run into trouble now.

My wifey does not understand why I am always watching the crowd, why, if I see a group of "questionable" men approaching us, I may take My hand from hers. She says it's My being ashamed, I cannot make her understand, it's self preservation at times. I am 47 years old now, and I am not nearly as quick to jump into a fight with a 20 frat boy as I used to be.

You can be damn sure, no matter where we are, I am constantly scanning the crowd, waiting for a fist to fly. This is Texas, in most towns, it's still frowned upon, and trust Me, I've been kicked enough times, punched enough times, and chased enough times to know when to run. And I won't put My girl through that, if she's still innocent to the thought of anti-gay, homophobic hate filled attacks, I will do what I can to keep it that way.