Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet
"the system"
the economy
my financial situation
my chevy car (PIECE OF SHIT)
NOT being able to find a very expensive item I seemed to have lost in the move. (VERY pissed about this one)
I'm pissed and disappointed at myself for various personal reasons
I'm pissed I made some very bad decisions (my friend said I didn't make bad decisions, that I made the decision that was the lessor of two evils... that made me feel good at the time and made me think that I didn't fuck up as bad as I had thought, but I'm still pissed at myself for making bad decisions, even if I didn't have any good ones to choose from.)
I'm pissed and hurt that I failed as a mother and will probably never have a good relationship with my son
I'm pissed that my Mom and a friend's Mom have been dealt such a horrible hand in life
I'm pissed that life is NEVER easy...
The calm person in me says it's okay to be pissed at the world sometimes, as long as you have good life and coping skills to deal with it and process those feelings in an appropriate manner.
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Ok, missy...
It is ok to be pissed at the world. However, I don't like when my friends consider themselves failures - ESPECIALLY when it comes to parenting special needs children.
You DID not FAIL anything. Parenting isn't a pass or fail as long as your child has grown into adulthood without you having caused irreparable harm to him. Period. You and I both know that our children will be in therapy, blaming us for the state of their lives, no matter our efforts. Its ok.
You should be proud of singly parenting a child with the challenges of your son. I know firsthand, on a daily basis, just how difficult a task this can be and you need to remember that as parents, we do the best we can. Period. Once the child reaches adulthood, its up to him.
To be brief. Be KIND to yourself.
I'm home and the phone is on if you need to talk. Even at 2am - but you know that.
By the way, if life were easy, I'm pretty sure we wouldn't appreciate the simpler joys. I, for one, wouldn't.
Big gay love,
C