Quote:
Originally Posted by Martina
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Hi Martina,
I will start by being honest, I have read your posts and have never responded even if I have felt I had something to add because you come across as so well informed I think I have been a little in awe of you and never felt I could bring anything of use `to the table ` as it were ! {this is said as a compliment not a criticism
} So I shall address that now !
Yes I do think it is expected of bigger women to make more of an effort to compensate for their weight/body shapes/figures. Too often we hear the phrase `oh she could put a bin bag on and look fabulous` and its nearly always said about `slim` women. I think there is a view that if a big woman has a full face of makeup and a smart pulled together outfit that by `making an effort` she has pulled back a few points {as society sees} that she lost because of her weight. And then of course you will hear comments like `oh shes so pretty, always makes such an effort with herself, if only she`d loose some weight she`d be perfect`
.gif "Say What?")
As I have answered your post it just dawned on me that when my own weight fluctuates and I`m a few pounds heavier/bloated etc and I try on something that feels tight and uncomfortable instead of just choosing something smart but that I know is roomier I fear I instead select something ultra comfy, oversized, dare I say shapeless which isnt so bad in itself but I now realise I then usually either dont bother with make up or use less and tone it down, put my hair in a ponytail instead of styling it, in short everything is taken down a level based on my not being able to squeeze into a particular size dress or skirt. I wasnt really conscious I was actually doing that until now. I need to be aware of that though its probably linked to issues with selfcare from my childhood.
Interested to hear other Femmes thoughts, thanks for the thread Martina.