[princessbelle]

Originally Posted by Kelt

I'm back from my week+ in the land of weird. Surreal doesn't even to begin to describe some of what is going on, I'll have to come back over the next couple of days and vent a bit, I'm glad this thread is here, I'm gonna be a new regular.

Everyday seems to be a new test of how many hats can I wear at once. A sample day: waking up to discover my mother has decided the house should be 90 degrees : setting up the special hearing impaired phone that I ordered and had drop shipped only to discover she doesn't plan on using phones anymore :- touring two more nursing homes to make sure my father is in the best : finding more clothes for him and learning how to use the heat press in laundry for labeling : having my ass pleasantly kissed by a "wealth management" firm that is doing literally nothing for us (at $55k per year in fees just to be on 'standby') and assessing whether or not I'm up for this challenge myself : straight back over to the nursing home to work with PT on customizing a wheelchair : whisking mother to her Dr appointment where she forgot where she was or why only to have the Dr say she's fine to live by herself based on a questionnaire of course as we left she wanted to know who the nice man was : off to the accountant to sign papers that aren't ready : discovering the park brake on her car decided to seize in the parking lot >> REAALLY?? : get that towed and another car : to head back to the nursing home to learn about swallowing issues in stroke patients from the speech therapist : back to mothers house to put together a tv because hers has been broken for a month only to have her tell me she won't watch it even though she just asked me to "fix" (replace) it that morning. .................etc............etc........ ... Of course then she only sleeps about 4 hours a night because throughout the day she 'nods-off' every half hour and gets her sleep then, and when mother's awake...yep, the 90 degree thing.

I'm pretty sure there was more and that was only one day. After a week of those days I'm pretty much ready for the booby-hatch (her term) myself.

And of course at the end of all this the return 7 hour drive at the end where I come home to find the yard guy bailed again and I have no food.

Me tired...



Oh yeah, hates me for being gone.

Wow Kelt. I feel for you. There is a LOT on your plate!!!! I'm guessing you are alone in this and that is not good. If you have no siblings, or at least none that will help, you are not alone. My brother passed a few years ago and this left me alone to care for my mom. I have since moved in with her because it made it way easier to care for her than from afar. But, i get that most people don't have that option. We, thankfully, lived less than a mile from each other so it was an easy option for me.

I wonder if you have (and please forgive me if this is redundant or too invasive) reached out to others...as in ...does their insurance company have Case Managers, Social Workers...do they qualify for Home Health and so on. There is a huge amount of help out there, problem is most people don't know where to look for it. Another problem is people may think they don't qualify for it, but almost all qualify for some.

I am a Registered Nurse and Case Manager and work with the elderly on a daily basis. Please reach out to someone, and feel free to reach out to me if you want to, you gotta get some help.

And again, you may have already done this but you should not be facing this along. No one should. Please know i am posting this with empathy and compassion.

In the mean time, i'll remember you in my prayers and send you white light and positive energy. We all have these "things" to deal with. The secret in walking the easiest and BEST path, is knowing our options....