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Old 11-15-2013, 07:55 AM   #15
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Originally Posted by Nat View Post
I love this thread. Even for those of us who aren't primary caregivers now, there's a time when many of us will be on the caregiver or caregivee side in the future. Whichever side we fall on, I think it's helpful to have more understanding beforehand.

And as the daughter of a primary caregiver, I'd love to know how those caregivers here are most in need of support. As a caregiver, what most do you need from your loved ones who are not in the caregivee role?
I take care of my mother- not living full time with her, but 2-3 days a week.

It was interesting to think about the question of what support i need.
When I was recently hospitalized and then recovering, my friends took up my responsibilities to mom- and that was an amazing blessing (not least because it involved travel to her).

Also fascinating to have to be the one receiving the care, instead if giving it. (A short video about my illness is in my signature link)

I'm single, and starting off trying to schedule dating around eldercare can be tricky and/or embarrassing. I know I should think "If someone can't handle my devotion to my mother, it's a bad match!" But what if the woman is really hot and I just want to date her? Anyway.
When I had to live with my mom (she had a more serious situation then) it was also awkward to not be able to bring women home.

People have told me that I'm "tied to my mother's apron strings" and that it's usually a gay (male) clichè to fret over one's mother. As always, it comes back to sexism and homophobia I guess.

Ever since I started taking care of Mom I've wanted to make a dykeumentary about how lesbians - who were often kicked out their families for their sexuality (and/or gender expression) are the ones who end up doing the eldercare. Is there already such a film? If not, should we make one?
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