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Old 12-30-2013, 09:49 PM   #43
Paradox
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Constant Outsider - Humanist
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She
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Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Toronto - Canada
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Great Thread.

I haven't had any dangerous issues with visibility and perhaps here in Canada there is more tolerance (not perfect by no means). I have heard of the rude, derogatory comments some of my friends received because of their appearance. There's a price to pay - the public scrutiny, community ridicule. It's like going through high school all over again. I always been thick skinned, but there are times that it is annoying can be hurtful.

I've experienced the 'what are you?' look on the faces of people I would meet for the first time who can not figure out if I am male or female. I don't scream dyke 24/7 but for many I look like a lesbian/butch. I received the double take in regard to the public washrooms on occasion, but again luckily nothing that would involve any confrontation.

Growing up tomboy, wearing my dads sweaters whenever I can, and preferring tees and slacks/jeans over skirt and dress is more natural for me.

I don't necessarily go out of may way to 'be' butch or non-femme. I have a naturally stronger masculine features. And it can be beneficial at times as I am not easily harassed. But at the same time there are the assumptions of what a butch should wear or how they should behave. However, there some nice, intelligent folks, as one friend who was smart enough to know that even though I look butch, (especially stereotypical idea that butch must = tough and rough), he understood due my height and size the odds of me moving around rolls of flooring by myself that was practically as tall as I am and weighting almost 500lbs ea is unlikely and got me the help I needed. He did not place misconceived assumptions about me because of a label, but used some practical sense.

Public displays of affection is not my cup of tea, and I am even more cautious when I am with a date or when I was in a relationship simply because people can be stupid and do stupid things. Much rather prevent an incident from happening as I don't handle stupid very well.
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