[candy_coated_bitch]

I ended up not having therapy Wednesday as Masshealth fucked up my ride. I was and am really disappointed, as I really needed that session. But I'll be back on Tuesday.

I had one therapist in the past who was big on Somatic techniques and sometimes I found it helpful and sometimes I found it even more triggering. It often caused me to dissociate, as I carry so much trauma my body does not want to experience or remember and forcing it does not help. And yes, it is also difficult with c-ptsd to untangle the threads where one trauma ends and the next begins. And there's the constant re-traumatization as d_c described. It wasn't for me. I find EMDR much more helpful though I didn't realize EMDR actually falls under Somatic Therapies, but it makes sense.

I fired that old therapist who kept triggering me and forcing me into traumas I wasn't ready for and constantly dissociating. It just didn't work out between us