How do I know when I am getting older?
~when I need a magnifying glass to read the newsprint and food labels,
~when I realize store clerks have no idea how to make change unless the register tells them and even then they can get it wrong,
~when I remember that Boone's Farm Apple Wine used to be the rage,
~when all kids look alike to me,
~when I go to say something and promptly forget what it was,
~when I cant find my keys cuz they spent the night in the lock,
~when I cruise the newspaper for the early bird specials,
~when colonoscopies and cholesterol pills are dinner conversation,
~when you go to matinee movies cuz you don't drive at night,
~when you ask for the senior discount everywhere,
~when the folks at the pharmacy know me by name
~ when the tv and movie stars of my generation are advertising boniva and activia.