[AtLast]

Originally Posted by MsMerrick

Note, first of all.. This is a question for people who have identified as Bisexual, currently id as such, and or those that think they may be, but aren't sure.
My question, really has more to do with..
Does it mean you are attracted to both males & females.. and if co, sexually, emotionally, a bit of both, just one.. or ..neither or..something else altogether?
I have always thought of myself as bisexual and , in what I call..strict Kinesyian definition, I am. I have enjoyed sex with and been attracted to, both males & females.. On the other hand, I am a tad mature.lol and at this stage of the game, aka life.. I am rarely attracted to anyone..
Also, several years ago, talking to a Butch friend, s/he was talking about having enjoyed sex with men, in hir younger days.. but finding that emotionally, who she went to, for comfort, to talk about a triumph, etc etc, were her female lovers, not her male ones.. a light bulb went off in my head, and I though ohmigawd, maybe I really am a Lesbian !
And yet.. .. I really don't know, if someone were to put a metaphysical gun to my head and say Ok, WHICH IS IT ...
A couple people were defining themselves as bisexual, and others talking about defining as bisexual, early on..then that changing ...
I hope I don't have to say this too often but
If you define bisexual as a disease ridden whore.. You might want to not post in this thread, though reading it, might be a n education ..
At least I hope it will

I guess part of what I am getting at..is it all about sex?
Seriously ..
Or is there something else, and if so, is that always divided as equally or randomly, as it were..
Is it about who we go to ? Who we date, who we are attracted to ?
Anybody want to go next ?

No, it isn't all about sex... wasn't and isn't for me, anyway. Even in the throws of raging hormones back in the day.

I did go through "that transitional” period of being bi when I was really lesbian many years ago as a young adult (early 20's- I know, I was actually slow!). It was really about denial and fear at that time.

I was heterosexual prior to this and continued to be sexual and loved men until nearly 30. Then, it was the combination of the physical and emotional energy that was most satisfying with women for me ht took hold. It remains that way, however, I have never felt negative about my relationships with men. Sex was good with them, too. Probably because I had good relationships with them outside of the sexual as well just as I have with women. And while I was bi, I was poly. This changed when I was with a particular woman and reached a developmental stage in which monogamy and commitment merged in a positive way for me (No, I don‘t hold that commitment is only within monogamous relationships). Been that way ever since.

To me, bisexuality is just one mode on the continuum of sexuality. I have even had a period in my life that I felt asexual - and it felt right. LOL, I guess I don't have a great need to badger myself about where I am sexually and never have since I became sexually active with others, or outside of myself (we come to sexual experience long before sharing it with someone else- pun intended ! Unless, unfort6unately, we are abused). As I look back (as well as today), I have just never been alarmed about any stage/mode of sexuality I have gone through.

I do know that I am at the core, lesbian and simply prefer women most of all on all of the levels of relating intimately (which goes beyond the physical for me) and have for many years now. This has been what I have personally felt to be sexual maturity for myself- a multi-dimensional array of sensation (including all of the senses) and perception physically, emotionally and spiritually with a woman. It’s not the same for everyone. Could that change? I doubt it, but, one never knows. I have arrived at a place (yes, it is about aging) in which I believe anything is possible.

One's character, content and carriage is what brings eroticism to me. So, I believe that may be part of why my sexual history has been heterosexual, bisexual, asexual and lesbian- it always hinged on these essential features of attraction and synergy for me, not necessarily one's gender.

Since I have become comfortable with what puts me in a state of butch, I would have to say that it is the state of femme that draws me more at this time of my life. Again, a late comer.

I had a wonderful fairly long-term relationship with a bi woman that was married and had an "open" marriage. It simply fit that particular time of my life and I believe that this was her natural and real state of sexuality. She really was equally attracted to and interested in both men and women and remains so. During this time, I was not bi.

I also think I am just more fluid in matters of sexuality and sex due to age and life’s experiences.

This will be an interesting thread, I think! And I also hope that there is no bi bashing.