[Quintease]

I coped really well, but then I never expected to be acknowledged in the street.

I :

Live in gay areas

Used to have stickers on my car

Didn't wear earrings or too much colour

Didn't wear much jewellery at all

Didn't hang out with gay men or straight women in gay places

Didn't put pretty things in my hair

Didn't giggle unless I was drunk

Didn't humor straight men at. all.

Would complain to my friends about invisibility so they'd feel obliged to step in if someone misidentified me

Would dress down (slightly) or drag (queen) up when going to a gay venue or anywhere with majority gay.

It sounds sucky but it wasn't for me. It took away from a heteronormative appearance, so lesbians would pick up that I wasn't straight and men would think twice before hitting on me.

Now that I'm married and not worried about pulling women, I've noticed a difference. My style has become more tomboyish, yet lesbians are starting to ID me as straight. I'm convinced this is because I'm starting to break all of my own rules.