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EnderD_503 · 08-19-2011, 05:51 AM

I've always had a good relationship with my mother, partly perhaps because we were each other's support growing up with my father. I think we continue to be each other's support even now that I'm in my 20s and he's completely out of the picture. I'm not sure that she really understands my queer sexuality. That's ok by me. She's slowly coming to understand why/how I identify as male, but it was really tough for her and it still is. I guess for a long time she thought I was going to grow up to be non-feminine and unique woman who would go on to disprove what women are/are not capable of physically and in other aspects of life. She thought that having a male identity would just turn me into another jock or typical guy or something. Evidently, that's not who I am or what I hope to be, but I'm still waiting for the day when she truly knows and believes that. I think she's slowly coming to understand that. I think as she continues to see that I want to maintain my visibility as an XX-born male identity, she'll understand more and more that it's not about being "a normal/stereotypical guy," but that I really do want to change things instead of just disappearing into normalcy and gender complacency.

She's making an effort and has been accepting, and that's what matters to me most. She is really the only blood relative that I have regular communication with and who I really count as family (other than one cousin), so I'm glad that we still have a good relationship.

08-19-2011, 05:51 AM	#16
EnderD_503 Member How Do You Identify?: Queer, trans guy, butch Preferred Pronoun?: Male pronouns Relationship Status: Relationship Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: Canada Posts: 1,329 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,090 Thanked 3,907 Times in 1,032 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	I've always had a good relationship with my mother, partly perhaps because we were each other's support growing up with my father. I think we continue to be each other's support even now that I'm in my 20s and he's completely out of the picture. I'm not sure that she really understands my queer sexuality. That's ok by me. She's slowly coming to understand why/how I identify as male, but it was really tough for her and it still is. I guess for a long time she thought I was going to grow up to be non-feminine and unique woman who would go on to disprove what women are/are not capable of physically and in other aspects of life. She thought that having a male identity would just turn me into another jock or typical guy or something. Evidently, that's not who I am or what I hope to be, but I'm still waiting for the day when she truly knows and believes that. I think she's slowly coming to understand that. I think as she continues to see that I want to maintain my visibility as an XX-born male identity, she'll understand more and more that it's not about being "a normal/stereotypical guy," but that I really do want to change things instead of just disappearing into normalcy and gender complacency. She's making an effort and has been accepting, and that's what matters to me most. She is really the only blood relative that I have regular communication with and who I really count as family (other than one cousin), so I'm glad that we still have a good relationship.