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Originally Posted by Ol' Jet
Nice informative thread, thanks for starting it. Personally, I lost 17 years to PTSD..the "S" meaning shock not stress. My trauma occured in one night. I suffered adrenal shock and lost 18 pounds over three days from shock; the doctors couldn't believe it. It's been a long road and there was never relief and no cure other than reliving it and facing what happened. It's taken a year to do just that. i should have died, but didn't. My hair changed color in 5 minutes; I lost pigmentation due to shock in my system.
Two things: prayer (lots of prayer) and a medicine to get me through the moments. My only regret is that my mom isn't alive to see me come through. 2010 is going to be a great year because I'm reclaiming my person and my life. But the thing is, I'd just as soon leave this world having been through this. I'm not one for wanting to live and i have to because I'm Catholic. I'm not invensted in life or anything it has to offer including a relationship. I've pretty much relinquished everything. A lot was taken from me and I'm not sure I can reclaim all of it. If not, i'm okay with that..
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I am not familiar with adrenal shock, will have to look up. It sounds horrible and I am so sorry you still have the feelings and symptoms you do.
I do understand the being OK with not being alive any more. I feel like that so much too.
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Originally Posted by atomiczombie
My answers are in red. I will come back and say more later.
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Thank you for answering AZ, I have or have had all of the symptoms too.
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Originally Posted by Andrew, Jr.
I am more "verbal" online than I am in real time. In real time I am very quiet and shy. I just feel the need to protect myself at all times. When you come from a violent childhood, you understand. Violence can be verbal, physical, emotional, intellectual, and sexual abuse. Basic dysfunction all the way around.
I will never understand why my mother never stood up to her husband. Never helped her kids. It blows my mind. When folks talk about how wonderful their families are...I just wonder what that really means.
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You know Andrew, we are about the same age. Things were different for women then, maybe she was as scared as you were.
In my case the biggest trauma that my father either killed or contributed heavily to the death of my mother and we moved to the United States in 4 days on the plane with her casket and never went home. My father was incredibly abusive always and we never mentioned my mother again. I lived in complete fear. Every day of every minute.
I broke ties with my father completely 11 years ago, and when he died last January had not seen him in 10 years...until after he died. I . see . him . everywhere . now. He is in my dreams, he is at the park looking at me, he is in my head.
I have a definite family phobia too. I get that completely.
Thank you all for sharing, I know its so difficult to even think about.