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Nomad · 10-27-2012, 02:28 PM

piggybacking off of the processing about straight women using the word "femme" as part of their identity --- i've heard other people use this word to describe themselves too. can a particular word actually "belong to" (for lack of a better descriptor) a particular group of people? i dont think it can in 95% of the cases. i know a solid handful of gay men who use the word "femme" to describe themselves. i know a straight man who uses the word to describe himself. i knew a transguy in Seattle that used the word "femme" to describe himself.

can we be perschnickity about this sort of thing? arent people's ID words theirs to choose? i bring it up, despite not knowing exactly where i stand on the idea because i'm still shuffling the info, because recently someone told me that i wasnt who i described myself to be. i called myself something, i cant remember what, something like blah blah blah stonefemme blah blah blah and the person i was talking to sort of laughed and said "oh Nomad, you're not a stone femme." (as if SHE would know!) i felt like she was negating my definition of myself and i dont know anyone who has the right to do that. so maybe that's where my curiosity-questioning-processing comes from, even though the two arent necessarily related.

and i hope this isnt derailing the thread because i dont want to do that.

(just trying to sort it all out)

10-27-2012, 02:28 PM	#90
Nomad Timed Out How Do You Identify?: stone femme Daddy's girl Preferred Pronoun?: she/her Relationship Status: disinterested Join Date: Jun 2012 Location: in my head Posts: 991 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,848 Thanked 3,745 Times in 734 Posts Rep Power: 0	piggybacking off of the processing about straight women using the word "femme" as part of their identity --- i've heard other people use this word to describe themselves too. can a particular word actually "belong to" (for lack of a better descriptor) a particular group of people? i dont think it can in 95% of the cases. i know a solid handful of gay men who use the word "femme" to describe themselves. i know a straight man who uses the word to describe himself. i knew a transguy in Seattle that used the word "femme" to describe himself. can we be perschnickity about this sort of thing? arent people's ID words theirs to choose? i bring it up, despite not knowing exactly where i stand on the idea because i'm still shuffling the info, because recently someone told me that i wasnt who i described myself to be. i called myself something, i cant remember what, something like blah blah blah stonefemme blah blah blah and the person i was talking to sort of laughed and said "oh Nomad, you're not a stone femme." (as if SHE would know!) i felt like she was negating my definition of myself and i dont know anyone who has the right to do that. so maybe that's where my curiosity-questioning-processing comes from, even though the two arent necessarily related. and i hope this isnt derailing the thread because i dont want to do that. (just trying to sort it all out)