[*Anya*]

It really is shocking when it happens and made me doubt myself so much (19-years) that I could be so blind and trusting.

I just have to accept I was in my 20's and just not burned often enough to become less trusting.

Totally vulnerable is not smart but wearing emotional armor isn't either.

A pre-nup is business and when you unite legally, there is love (better be) but one has to protect their assets (no matter how small) and whatever you want left for your children (if any).

The legal fight, if there is one, is costly and emotionally damaging.

My recent ex spent a fortune fighting her ex domestic partner just so she could "win" because she was so pissed her partner of 20-years (no infidelity) wanted out. The partner took less to just to end it.

That should have been a clue for me but it took me a couple of years to figure out the other side of the equation.

Originally Posted by butchgeek

Knowing what I know now, I will. I went into marriage thinking that it was forever. I did not expect that it would end with the infidelity of my ex after 15 years. I also did not expect the level of dishonesty, manipulation, frankly money-grubbing that ensued. I have a learned a great deal, and would rather have this conversation, as awkward as it may be, when a future relationship starts to get serious, to protect both of us from the unexpected.