[thedivahrrrself]

Originally Posted by chris1life

Alright this is my first thread and Maybe I'll be able to explain without it sounding nuts. My daughter is 13 she came out to me a week or so ago that's how I found this site. Was looking for someone That is going through something similar. I tried to talk to my mom but I was in my early 20 when I came out she doesnt quite understand. I myself being butch and married to a woman has no problem with her being a lesbian. I'm actually very proud that she had the nerve and awareness to do it now. This is my concern for her as her mother. As I've said in other post we live in small town Mississippi and the tolerance for us is small. I worry people will b mean to her. Kids are awful to each other. I worry that she will have to go through the confusion I went through regarding my identity. I worry that if she does experience a lot of hate she will blame me for it. This can be a hard life, yes its getting better but we still Have a long way to go. I look at her and am so proud of her but at the same time its a little sad. Id always hoped she would be straight just to save her heart ache. Her fathers side of the family is very religious and she is close to them. I'm worried how they will treat her. We talked she knows I support her and love her and she also knows if someone messes With her mama bear will be there for her. I guess my question is this how do you help someone so young find themselves or do you help and how do you help them when friends or family is cruel. I want to be there for her and I want her to be happy. All of that may seem like rambling but I was older and dealt with things on my own but she is still just a kid.

Kids, even in Mississippi, are a lot better than they used to be. All you can do is be there for her and support her. She is brave to have come out so young. But being so young you have to realize that her identity is still developing and let her know that it doesn't have to be set in stone. I think you have to let her reveal herself at her own pace and in her own way, and be there to catch her when there's fallout. She has an opportunity to define herself as she sees fit, something most of us were not afforded until much later in life. She is blessed.

I know you worry about her because she's gay, but if you think of it, she is really lucky, for a young lesbian. She has a mom who truly understands, and also accepts and supports her. How many of us can say we had that?

I know you hate that you can't protect her from bigotry, but it is not so hard to wage a battle in the world when you have a supportive place to come home to.