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Old 01-01-2018, 12:56 AM   #6
Deborah*
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Originally Posted by lisa93 View Post
I'm new here but I really need advice, and I feel like this is one of the few places that understand the butch/femme dynamics.

So anyways I'm the femme and my gf is butch. We've have been in a loving relationship for 5 years, we now own a house together and are even considering adoption soon. We have never had any incidences of violence in the past. My gf doesn't even like to raise her voice. I'm definitely the more feisty one. I've always had trust issues due to being cheated on in the past so on this particular night I saw a text pop up from a random girl's name, I asked her who it was, and she told me it was her friend. I didn't believe her so I snatched the phone but it was locked. I told her to give me her password and she wouldn't. I stupidly in the heat of the moment threw the phone across the floor and shattered the screen.

Then I got the shock of my life because she slapped the shit out of me. Mind you she's a lot bigger, taller, and stronger than me. But I'm no punk either so I hit her back and we started fighting like for real. She ended up whooping my ass bad. I was screaming and the guy who rents our basement out heard us and pulled her off of me.

She left that night to stay with her mom, but she's back in the house now. She apologized but I still told her to sleep in the guest room because I'm not over it. I can't believe she would ever put her hands on me like that. I want to get past this because I love her, and we have built a life together but idk if things will go back to normal. Any advice you all may have would be appreciated.
Honestly, I'd call the national domestic violence hotline. The phone # is 1-800-799-7233 http://www.thehotline.org to chat online. The hotline won't be biased because you're lesbian - they couldn't care less. What they DO care about is your welfare and safety.

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