randrum,
Don't forget that sex and gender are not the same thing. There are butches who identify as female (sex), but not as a woman (gender). Butch is also a gender.
Additionally, many do not see sex (male/female) as binary and instead see it as on a continuum. Genderqueer people, for example see themselves as somewhere in the middle (or they see themselves as both). There are gender neutral people, genderfluid people, etc.
I am just suggesting that you don't jump to male from female. There is lots inbetween. Don't stress yourself out about it. Do some research on gender theory.
I identify as stone, butch, and as transgender (not transsexual). I use male pronouns, but I am also ok with "hy". I am closer to male on the gender/sex continuum and have had male top surgery. Professionally, I live as female, but outside of work I usually "pass" for male and prefer to be related to as a male by the public. I use the men's restroom. See? Gender is fluid and fun! ha! Don't box yourself in!
I have never been to our chat, but I assume people are asking because they want to know which pronoun you would like used. You can either tell them you just want your name used, or choose a pronoun.
Last thing. There are a lot of female identified butches (plus butches who identify as both a female and as a woman), who are more masculine than male identified butches. Additionally, there are a lot of female identified butches who pack. Don't let the traditional societal way of thinking about gender get in your way.
Enjoy the gender journey!
__________________
-Dapper
Are you educated or indoctrinated?
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