Quote:
Originally Posted by always2late
I have been pondering something for a bit...and I decided to start a thread about it.
Several years ago, my dad and I had a discussion about the decimation of "traditional" masculine attributes. He stated that society and the media were making the idea of "traditional" masculinity superfluous. The idea of masculinity representing strength was become an anaethema. "Men", according to my dad, were now supposed to be "sensitive" and exhibit attributes commonly associated with the traditional idea of "feminine". I began thinking about how I viewed masculinity....and what I "expected" with regards to behavior and mannerisms. And, at the risk of receiving a ton of sh*t for it, I have to admit that the type of masculinity I am attracted to could best be described as "traditional".
I was wondering if it would be possible to open a discussion on this premise. I am especially interested in the opinions of our butch/FTM community, and anyone else who has struggled with the idea of gender and the "traditional" roles prescribed by society. What are your views as to what constitutes masculine attributes and/or "personality"? And have you found your ideas challenged by family, friends, significant others, or society in general?
P.S. Came back to edit and add this....for the femmes...what do you look for in a partner with regard to masculinity? What are your ideas and/or preferences in this area?
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My father (a child of the Greatest Generation) was a sensitive man with strength. I saw my father cry many times on many occasions, but never considered this to be a feminine trait. My mother was equally strong and dished out the penalties. I would always wonder, as a child, why my friends would be more scared of punishment from their father. I thought it was strange because if you even considered looking at my mother wrong, she'd take your head off faster than a New York minute. My mother had, if I had to place a word on it, inner strength. She ran the household financially.
I considered my father to be a man's man of his generation in some ways and I guess anti-stereotypical in others as I grew and came to understand more of what I observed. I tried to emulate him more than my mother because I felt a gender kinship with him. Both of them define me. When I observe masculinity in men, I see many things. Some of which I have always had/felt and others that don't fit me at all.
I've always looked for both strength and sensitivity in a partner. The strength shown by my mother and the sensitivity by my father.