How romantic are you?

[VintageFemme]

Romance is truly the only way to my heart. I'm an old fashioned romantic too. I'm not a practical girl whatsoever. I would much rather be given flowers than a plant any day. And I love reading poetry to someone of my affections and having it read to me as well. Or better still, writing poetry for someone and vice versa. Love songs and 'our song' and secrets between only each other that no one else 'gets', flirting, love letters handwritten, oh the list goes on forever! There is nothing as romantic as chivalry either. Not to me at least.

Some of the most romantic moments in my life have been first kisses. I love when that first kiss is asked for. "May I kiss you?" Good goddess is there anything sweeter? I don't think so. Once it was standing in a parking lot in the rain. That might be the most romantic kiss I've ever had.

And then once, on a first date while waiting for her to show up, she calls and asks if I'm ready and when I tell her I am, she tells me to go my balcony. I lived on the third floor and of course it was dark. I do and it's Winter and very cold but all of a sudden I hear her below me on the ground starting to play her guitar and sing, "Wild Thing" LOL! to me!!! I about fell over laughing and my heart was just jumping all around in my chest. It was so adorable and when she was through, all of these other people from other balconies started applauding LoL... needless to say, a very romantic date ensued. And then once someone played Happy Birthday to me on their harmonica naked for my birthday, and still another time a midnight picnic under the stars, and and and...

Mhmmm there is absolutely NOTHING better than romance.

[JAGG]

I am very romantic but I don't kiss and tell so you just have to find out on your own.

[TheMerryFairy]

*Smiles* Well, I am very romantic but it isn't always done in a traditional sense. It really depends on the situation and the person

I always keep the romance burning . Sometimes it is intense and other times it is a soft, slow burn. I believe that with the right person I can and WILL sweep them off their feet.

I don't necessarily expect anything from anyone else but chilvary goes a long way.

[WolfyOne]

I thought this was going to be a poll...imagine my disappointment

And like JAGG, I don't kiss and tell
There are ways of finding out...one would be to ask

[MsTinkerbelly]

When I get in the car at o dark thirty in the morning and find a full tank of gas...yep, I get all squishy.

I'm the letter sending, leave love notes on the windshield, give her a massage kind of girl, but do something to simply make my life easier and I'm a puddle at her feet.

May I ask what is it about displaying good manners (ie. holding doors open) that makes them a romantic gesture instead of normal behaviour with everyone?

Romance, like most things, is subjective. I'm with you Words, a simple act merely to please is as romantic as the traditional grand gestures.

[WolfyOne]

Originally Posted by Daktari

May I ask what is it about displaying good manners (ie. holding doors open) that makes them a romantic gesture instead of normal behaviour with everyone?

Romance, like most things, is subjective. I'm with you Words, a simple act merely to please is as romantic as the traditional grand gestures.

I will open a car door or any door I can get to before she gets to it, to let a femme in and you're right, it is about good manners.
Are you telling me, it's not normal behavior for everyone
That's something I learned young.

Originally Posted by WolfyOne

I will open a car door or any door I can get to before she gets to it, to let a femme in and you're right, it is about good manners.
Are you telling me, it's not normal behavior for everyone
That's something I learned young.

I'm saying it is normal behaviour, like you I was brought up that way. I was wondering why treating women (men and children too) with good manners is considered chivalrous and romantic.

[Apocalipstic]

I'm not romantic.
But I want to be.
Someday.

[VeganDebbie]

Originally Posted by Apocalipstic

I'm not romantic.
But I want to be.
Someday.

You and me both.....

[VintageFemme]

Originally Posted by Daktari

May I ask what is it about displaying good manners (ie. holding doors open) that makes them a romantic gesture instead of normal behaviour with everyone?

I couldn't agree with you more. Case in point:

Years ago a coworker asked me if I was gay. Have you seen me? I am so femme and rarely if ever, does anyone think I'm gay much less ask me and so in shock I looked at her and asked her, "why would you ask me that?" and she proceeded to tell me that straight women don't hold the door open for other women nor do they light each others cigarettes. I was appalled at her comment. I don't do those things because I am gay, I do them because it is the right thing to do. Our society has become so self involved that we have forgotten common courtesies and manners.

And re: Chivalry? Again, I couldn't agree more. Opening car doors and walking on the outside of a sidewalk is not chivalrous however... again, case in point:

Years ago when I was in a relationship, my son, my partner and myself were sightseeing. I was completely oblivious to my surroundings and taking pictures not paying any attention to who was around me or what was going on. My partner and son both came and removed me from the situation quietly and calmly without my even being aware of what was going on and afterthefact I discovered I was in the middle of a very questionable environment and my safety could have been very much in question. That... was chivalry.

[wahya]

In a sentence my ex gf used to call me Pe Pe le pew, Unfortunetly she was penelope. lol

Originally Posted by wahya

In a sentence my ex gf used to call me Pe Pe le pew, Unfortunetly she was penelope. lol

Was that because you smelled when stressed and called her 'my petit cabbage'?

[wahya]

Originally Posted by Daktari

Was that because you smelled when stressed and called her 'my petit cabbage'?

Yeah..I think that had to be it! Wow that's what it had to be. Well I better cancel my therapy appt now. lol

[thedivahrrrself]

I think I am too much of a klutz to pull off romance. LOL And I'm a terrible liar so keeping surprises to myself is very hard for me.

I do make very sweet mix tapes And I do special things for the person I love. I just don't pull them off in a way that screams "romance". It's more likely to be like, "Look! I made you heart-shaped cookies," and then I drop the tray all over the floor.

I don't find the traditional "romantic" things to be all that romantic. I wish I had seen the flowers in South America, though, before I made a blanket statement about hating flowers. As it turns out, I just hate roses...and carnations.

I like to be romanced a little. Too much can be kind of awkward I think. But it's nice to know the person you love appreciates you and cares about the things you enjoy. There are few things more romantic than watching stars together, in my opinion, so U planning a surprise trip to the planetarium was a super sweet gesture. Sending his friends back to buy and then secretly transport a drum I fell in love with at a craft fair probably tops my list of the most romantic things anyone's ever done for me. I was completely surprised. Spontaneity definitely adds to the romance.

[SuddenlyWestFemme]

My ex was neither romantic nor polite (but I was in love anyway). I stopped thinking about romance as important. And then the first date I went on after we broke up (way before I was ready to date) was with a very polite and romantic Butch and it just felt so wonderful. For me, it is like a light switch... turn it on and I light up. When off, I don't remember how great the light feels.

And in regards to manners versus romance. Personally, I consider holding the car door open as romantic and not just polite. Where I grew up, this was not done in general--so it is not a 'back in my day' kind of thing. Car door opening was ONLY done in dating situations (well... or if someone's hands were full and they couldn't do it themselves). Maybe it is different geographically? So I associate it with the excitement of dating and do consider it romantic. Now, not letting the house door slam on, or holding open the building door is just being polite (in my book).

I do agree with Dakarti in general. Being polite is not romantic--it is just the right thing to do. But polite can mean different things culturally... so I classify things as romantic that others may think are just basic manners and visa versa.

I am a spontaneous romantic (in the way Hollylane mentioned earlier-- stealing a kiss, being the first to link arms, making last minute decisions to take a walk in the moonlight, and other little spontaneous things).

Question on romance (that was coincidentally bought up at work yesterday): If someone brings flowers to every girl they've ever dated on the 2nd date... well... is it romance or dating routine? If someone gives every person they've ever dated a handmade picture album, filled with pictures of the two of you, for Christmas... is it romantic or dating routine? Any thoughts on the difference between romance and dating routines...or if they are the same thing. Does it even matter?

[~baby~doll~]

I live for romance. My favorite is the twenty-four hour love affair when I find hints of love and detailed plans for the evening. It starts with crimson lip prints on the mirrors. Then I find a menu of desired dishes for dinner with wines. I get red 's delivered.
The best is a hand written description of our love making. I am so romanced by this point I can hardly fulfill my plans for the day.

[ForestGirl88]

I tend to be overly practical. I clean the house, fix the faucet, make you a five course dinner and rock your body with things like drinking wine off your skin and letting you completely sit this one out (so to speak).

But......I have a very hard time talking about my feelings or being gushy and vulnerable. I should be butch, but I'm definately femme lol!

[CherryBlonde]

Originally Posted by Daktari

May I ask what is it about displaying good manners (ie. holding doors open) that makes them a romantic gesture instead of normal behaviour with everyone?

Romance, like most things, is subjective. I'm with you Words, a simple act merely to please is as romantic as the traditional grand gestures.

What makes it romantic and chivalrous is the fact that not everyone does do it. In fact a lot of people dont do it. It says something about a person that treats me and others like that all the time. It says they care and are caring. It also says they care enough to make me feel special and make me feel safe and protected. Everything doesnt have to be a grand gesture. It's the little things that count too but to say that opening doors and walking on the outside of the sidewalk is not romantic and chivalrous is in itself an unromantic comment.

[Semantics]

I think unromantic comments do it for me.

Questioning the norm is true chivalry. I'm pretty sure I read that once in Andreas Capellanus's The Art of Courtly Love, but then again my Latin is a bit rusty.