Butch Femme Planet  

Go Back   Butch Femme Planet > GENDER AND IDENTITY > General Gender Discussions

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 05-27-2010, 08:57 PM   #81
Nat
Senior Member

How Do You Identify?:
bigender
Preferred Pronoun?:
whatevs
Relationship Status:
in a relationship
 

Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Tx
Posts: 3,535
Thanks: 11,042
Thanked 13,993 Times in 2,596 Posts
Rep Power: 21474853
Nat Has the BEST ReputationNat Has the BEST ReputationNat Has the BEST ReputationNat Has the BEST ReputationNat Has the BEST ReputationNat Has the BEST ReputationNat Has the BEST ReputationNat Has the BEST ReputationNat Has the BEST ReputationNat Has the BEST ReputationNat Has the BEST Reputation
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jackhammer View Post
In my mind there are many roads that go in different directions that we all have traveled, and no matter how different our experiences and results have been, we share the most important thing in common. Every damn one of those roads were like sharp gravel under bare feet, so no matter how you identify on this website- to me, we are all brave, fearless and deserve respect.
This is beautifully stated.
__________________
I'm a fountain of blood. In the shape of a girl.

- Bjork

What is to give light must endure burning.

-Viktor Frankl
Nat is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Nat For This Useful Post:
Old 05-27-2010, 10:10 PM   #82
amiyesiam
Senior Member

How Do You Identify?:
femme
Preferred Pronoun?:
she/they
Relationship Status:
single
 
amiyesiam's Avatar
 

Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: pa
Posts: 2,703
Thanks: 17,488
Thanked 10,138 Times in 2,161 Posts
Rep Power: 21474853
amiyesiam Has the BEST Reputationamiyesiam Has the BEST Reputationamiyesiam Has the BEST Reputationamiyesiam Has the BEST Reputationamiyesiam Has the BEST Reputationamiyesiam Has the BEST Reputationamiyesiam Has the BEST Reputationamiyesiam Has the BEST Reputationamiyesiam Has the BEST Reputationamiyesiam Has the BEST Reputationamiyesiam Has the BEST Reputation
Member Photo Albums
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jackhammer View Post
Under our names in the custom pronoun field is a place to accommodate how we prefer to be addressed, we incorporated it into the website because we felt it would help all of us approach each other in a more genuine and respectful manner. Using a pronoun that negates an identity chosen by a member isn't taken lightly by this website, because it does matter to some of those many brave folks who make up this diverse community and fill it out.

There will never be a default for ALL of us, just like there will never be a true universal toilet flapper for all toilets, or one cutting blade that fits all lawn mowers.
I heard people say that it was a shame that we even have to have a box for pronoun preference because the default "should" be x, y or z. The way I see it, it is never a shame to empower someone with the ability to self-identify or make space for people to be honored.
The pronoun field, I know, some don't care for, however I think it is wonderful. Anything that allows me to know, before I engage someone, what their pronoun preference is, can only be a good thing. I don't want to disrespect anyone or look like I am trying to be disrespectful when I wouldn't do such a thing.
__________________


A year from now you will wish that you started today~Karen Lamb
amiyesiam is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to amiyesiam For This Useful Post:
Old 05-27-2010, 11:51 PM   #83
friskyfemme
Member

How Do You Identify?:
femme
Preferred Pronoun?:
precious
Relationship Status:
down to earth
 
friskyfemme's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Arizona
Posts: 332
Thanks: 395
Thanked 370 Times in 152 Posts
Rep Power: 827
friskyfemme Has the BEST Reputationfriskyfemme Has the BEST Reputationfriskyfemme Has the BEST Reputationfriskyfemme Has the BEST Reputationfriskyfemme Has the BEST Reputationfriskyfemme Has the BEST Reputationfriskyfemme Has the BEST Reputationfriskyfemme Has the BEST Reputationfriskyfemme Has the BEST Reputationfriskyfemme Has the BEST Reputationfriskyfemme Has the BEST Reputation
Default

This has been interesting reading. I just want to share something with ya'll. I grew up in the midwest. We referred to everyone as 'you guys'. My mother, however, was insulted when a waitress in a restaurant greeted her, myself, and my sisters with how are 'you guys' today. My mother retorted 'do you see any guys at this table?' Though none of her daughters even realized the wording, it did make me aware that it really was not appropriate for our server to address us that way. She meant no disrespect I am sure, but I would hope that my mother speaking up made her more aware of how she could be preceived. So ya'll take a lesson! Being respectful, is not about what is comfortable for you. It's about what is comfortable for the person you're addressing. As well as, being compassionate is 'not assuming disrespect' is about assuming ignorance of the part of other person. We need to be more tolerant and kinder to each other while we as a non-hetro group are emerging into a cohesive force to be reckoned with.
Love and Light.
__________________
Love and Light,
FF
friskyfemme is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to friskyfemme For This Useful Post:
Old 05-28-2010, 03:16 AM   #84
chefhottie25
Member

How Do You Identify?:
boi
Preferred Pronoun?:
hy
Relationship Status:
happily taken
 
chefhottie25's Avatar
 

Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: ohio
Posts: 1,406
Thanks: 26
Thanked 889 Times in 477 Posts
Rep Power: 1175216
chefhottie25 Has the BEST Reputationchefhottie25 Has the BEST Reputationchefhottie25 Has the BEST Reputationchefhottie25 Has the BEST Reputationchefhottie25 Has the BEST Reputationchefhottie25 Has the BEST Reputationchefhottie25 Has the BEST Reputationchefhottie25 Has the BEST Reputationchefhottie25 Has the BEST Reputationchefhottie25 Has the BEST Reputationchefhottie25 Has the BEST Reputation
Default

This is an interesting topic. I identify as a boi...although most of the heterosexual people in my life refer to me as butch. I am slowly educating them. My dad and best friend both get it and call me a boi. However, at work(i am a chef) I am aware of the woman in me. There are no other women that work in the kitchen. My co-workers view me as a woman, but again I am slowly educating them on the boi construct. On a few occasions some of my co-workers have told me that I cook like a guy, or that I am like a guy because I engage in the conversations about which servers are hot, and because I am not obviously upset by their banter and name calling amongst one another. So, I guess that this thread as got me thinking about how I identify. I know I am a boi...but I have been called both he and she. Neither one really matters to me. I guess I have some more thinking to do.
chefhottie25 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to chefhottie25 For This Useful Post:
Old 05-28-2010, 09:29 AM   #85
Dylan
Timed Out

How Do You Identify?:
Permanently Banned 10/2010
Preferred Pronoun?:
He
Relationship Status:
She thinks all my jokes are corny
 
Dylan's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Great State O'
Posts: 880
Thanks: 1,027
Thanked 1,839 Times in 500 Posts
Rep Power: 0
Dylan Has the BEST ReputationDylan Has the BEST ReputationDylan Has the BEST ReputationDylan Has the BEST ReputationDylan Has the BEST ReputationDylan Has the BEST ReputationDylan Has the BEST ReputationDylan Has the BEST ReputationDylan Has the BEST ReputationDylan Has the BEST ReputationDylan Has the BEST Reputation
Default

Martina,

If you started a thread to discuss femme/your gender and to discuss how sometimes your gender is sometimes lumped erroneously with another's gender, and a bunch of butches came into that thread and started discussing how A) your gender is automatically disrespectful to theirs, and B) why don't you ID as butch? and C) celebrated being butch and D) mocked you and started having poking and jabbing conversations about femmes/your gender...would you feel your femme/your gender thread were the right place for that celebration?

Aside from that, you're right...I generalized your personal post. For that, I apologize. It's not fair to you. Again, I'm sorry.


Dylan

P.S. Butler is heinous
Dylan is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Dylan For This Useful Post:
Old 10-11-2017, 08:32 PM   #86
lisa93
Junior Member

How Do You Identify?:
femme
 

Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: maryland
Posts: 31
Thanks: 0
Thanked 20 Times in 10 Posts
Rep Power: 7
lisa93 is on a distinguished road
Default

I never realized this before.
lisa93 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to lisa93 For This Useful Post:
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 05:31 AM.


ButchFemmePlanet.com
All information copyright of BFP 2018