Funny or Silly Lyrics From a Country Song

[A. Spectre]

I'll start:


And I'd like to check you for ticks....


Brad Paisley 2007 "Ticks"

[Kätzchen]

"Please don't let him talk you back
The way he's done before
Why he's had a hundred chances
He don't deserve you anymore"

Buck Owens (He Don't Deserve You Anymore)


<<<<<~~~ my go-to anthem that I sometimes sing to myself (among other good C/W song lyrics)

[charley]

May the bird of paradise fly up your nose
May an elephant caress you with his toes
May your wife be plagued with runners in her hose
May the bird of paradise fly up your nose

[homoe]

Thank God and Greyhound you're gone
I didn't know how much longer I could go on
Watching you take the respect out of me
Watching you make a total wreck out of me
That big diesel motor is a-playing my song
Thank God and Greyhound you're gone

[homoe]

I've been washed down the sink of your conscience
In the theater of your love I lost my part
And now you say you've got me out of your conscience
I've been flushed from the bathroom of your heart

[homoe]

Well, he must o' thought that is quite a joke
And it got a lot of laughs from a' lots of folk
It seems I had to fight my whole life through
Some gal would giggle and I'd get red
And some guy'd laugh and I'd bust his head
I tell ya, life ain't easy for a boy named "Sue"

[homoe]

Ya can't roller skate in a buffalo herd
Ya can't roller skate in a buffalo herd
Ya can't roller skate in a buffalo herd
But you can be happy if you've a mind to

[homoe]

All my ex's live in Texas
And Texas is the place I'd dearly love to be
But all my ex's live in Texas
And that's why I hang my hat in Tennessee

[homoe]

Now everyone blamed his old man
For making him mean as a snake
When Amos Moses was a boy
His daddy would use him for alligator bait
Tie a rope around his neck and throw him in the swamp
Alligator bait in the Louisiana bayou

[homoe]

She said, "I'm going out with my girlfriends
Margaritas at the Holiday Inn"
Oh, have mercy, my only thought
Was tequila makes her clothes fall off

[Kätzchen]

"You Cant Go Roller Skating In a Buffalo Herd," -- Roger Miller.


I think I got it wrong earlier and hope this makes up for it, Ace.

[homoe]

Hat down, cross town, livin' like a rockstar
Spent a lot of money on my brand new guitar
Baby's got a habit: diamond rings and Fendi sports bras
Ridin' down Rodeo in my Maserati sports car
Got no stress, I've been through all that
I'm like a Marlboro Man so I kick on back
Wish I could roll on back to that old town road
I wanna ride 'til I can't no more

[homoe]

You can tell your mom I moved to Arkansas
You can tell your dog to bite my leg
Or tell your brother Cliff whose fist can tell my lip
He never really liked me anyway

[homoe]

I like beer, it makes me a jolly good fellow
I like beer, it helps me unwind and sometimes it makes me feel mellow (Makes him feel mellow)
Whiskey's too rough, Champagne costs too much, vodka puts my mouth in gear
This little refrain should help me explain as a matter of fact I like beer

IF I'm not mistaken, Brett Kavanaugh sang this at his confirmation ceremony..

[Bèsame*]

Breaking up with you was like taking my bra off
Feeling free and loose like this T-shirt I got on
Yeah I should be crying, grieving some kind of loss
But it's like taking this pink and lacy, suffocating bra off

[Bèsame*]

You got frisky with your boss at the copy machine
You drunk-dialed your ex-husband, don't remember a thing
Had a fancy dinner at your mother-in-law's
Spilled A1 Sauce on her table cloth, don't sweat it
Tide stick will get it

[Bèsame*]

She put the her in hurt
She put the why in try
She put the S-O-B in sober
She put the hang in hangover (hangover)
She put the ex in sex
She put the low in blow
She put a big F-U in my future
Yeah she's got a way
She's got a way with words
Yeah she's got a way with words

[A. Spectre]

I love you honey
I love your money
But most of all I love your automobile


Patsy Cline I love you honey

[Kätzchen]

I never promised you a rose garden

(Lynn Anderson).

[Bèsame*]

Sittin' on a bench at West Town Mall
He sat down in his overalls and asked me
You waitin' on a woman
I nodded yeah and said how 'bout you
He said son since nineteen fifty-two I've been
Waitin' on a woman