Opposites attract?

[MsTinkerbelly]

While reading the "living alone, does it make you weird" thread i got to thinking about my own relationship, and how we are polar opposites when it comes to some very basic things.

I am an introvert; enjoying time on my own, the thoughts in my head, and the friendship of a few carefully chosen people. A party is easier with someone to go with, and i never go a new place alone.

My Kasey is an extrovert; she loves everyone she meets, wants to talk all the time, wants to go/do/see everything, and always wants to be with me.

Yet...it works for us!

She gets me out and doing things, i give her the family eating popcorn by the fire, and she helps me be more involved with the world.

Because i am not working and she works from home there are few but precious alone times, but i make the most of them i can...reading, bird watching, napping etc...

So tell me, are you opposites? How do YOU make it work?

[candy_coated_bitch]

You are pretty much describing me and my partner when it comes to the introvert/extrovert thing. Mostly I think it works for us although I am still not sure he 100% gets what it means to be an introvert.

We don't live together, but I spend at least half my time at his house. He doesn't mind interacting with me ALL the time and sometimes I have to say to him that I really want to be alone, or have suggested he go talk to some other friends LOL. Luckily he doesn't take offense. He worries sometimes about leaving me alone if he wants to go out and I am usually like--no REALLY, please go out. I will be fine! (In my mind: I can't WAIT to be alone finally!) We find humor in it.

My introversion helps ground him I think and his energy and extroversion does help me get outside of myself, and outside of the house so I am not a shut in.

He is also a very thinking/logical person and I am much more feeling/intuitive person. This CAN create many problems in communication, but it can also be good because we are each good at different things and help each other out.

We both do creative work (I'm an artist, he's a furniture conservator), but we do different kinds of work. He has to be very precise and also knows how to build things and I am really great at color and take a lot of risks. We have found that we both have assets the other doesn't have we have both helped each other out in projects.

He's a meat eater, I'm a vegetarian. That we just have to accept about each other, though when he picks up pig heads from the local butcher it's rather disturbing to me. But he cooks a lot of vegetarian stuff for me, which is nice.

What else? We are both fairly neat but not neat freaks so we don't have any Odd Couple issues there. He's 17 years older than me so there can be generational issues at times. With pop culture we are in two totally different places. Half the time he doesn't get my references and half the time I don't get his. He will ask me about a TV show for instance, that I have never even heard of. And I will ask when it was on. He will say "Oh in the early 70's." And I will have to say, my love I wasn't even born then LOL.

He also LOVES telling stories. Over and over and over. I prefer to communicate concisely and when necessary. I have a rule now where he can tell me the same story three times and then I reserve the right not to listen. Sometimes I will sit there for a while before I can't hold in the snickering and he will say "Oh, have you heard this one before?" Oy vey.

But on of the things I love most about him is that he lets me laugh at him.

He's an optimist, I'm a realist.

Really, our relationship is very complicated and the differences can be difficult. But I think on the whole we benefit from them when we remember to accept each other and also have a sense of humor! To me, it's beneficial to be able to draw on each other's strengths--we have gotten each other through difficult times that way and have also helped each professionally with interesting results.

I doubt I would want to be with someone too much like me! We'd just exist in opposite ends of the house reading books and never speaking or going out LOL.

[MsTinkerbelly]

Thanks ccb!

Since we live together full time i have to find other ways to get me time...one of the best is when my daughter is gone for the weekend and i can garage sale by myself. I have a small ebay business and i find some of the coolest things at garage/yard/tag/estate sales.

Another way is walking the dog as it gives me time to think without a lot of distractions. Although, it's a bit hot now so we spend more time in the backyard.

[cricket26]

i have always said.."its a cruel world...opposites attract"...because it is a blessing and a curse to be with your "opposite self"

because in many ways opposites compliment each other and help each other not only survive but bring out the best in each other

but even when opposites are working together and creating amazing partnerships things can get very difficult....

being with an opposite can bring out the best and the worst in you...but you will never be bored!

[MsTinkerbelly]

Originally Posted by cricket26

i have always said.."its a cruel world...opposites attract"...because it is a blessing and a curse to be with your "opposite self"

because in many ways opposites compliment each other and help each other not only survive but bring out the best in each other

but even when opposites are working together and creating amazing partnerships things can get very difficult....

being with an opposite can bring out the best and the worst in you...but you will never be bored!

So very true!

I have been with people much like myself, and often times felt bored out of my mind! There is somethng to be said for beng with someone who brngs out your other side and keeps you on your toes. Lol

[JDeere]

I am a mix of introvert and extrovert, she is a major extrovert.
I listen to country music and she listens to rap.
I dress my way and she dresses her way.
There are a few more thing probably but I can't think of it right off the top of my head, I need to think a bit more.

I think if you can make it work, being opposites, than more power to the couple. I however have to work extra hard on mine, she is a handful and a half.

[lisa93]

my first love was my opposite but we didn't work well together.

[Gemme]

DC and I compliment one another very well. Our strengths and weaknesses balance each other out and make it easier to move through life's obstacles. I tend to get upset quickly but it burns out shortly whilst He tends to have a slow burning wick but when He gets upset, there's Hell to pay. He's more quiet and I'm more social. We're very yin and yang but We have a lot of similarities too. I think that 100% opposites will have a harder time of it than a couple that is 75-85% opposite. There's needs to be some sort of overlapping, be it favorite foods, TV shows, hobbies, etc.

[girl_dee]

i totally think opposites attract and as long as you let each other be who you are, it can (and is for me) amazing

[Kätzchen]

Originally Posted by MsTinkerbelly

While reading the "living alone, does it make you weird" thread i got to thinking about my own relationship, and how we are polar opposites when it comes to some very basic things.

I am an introvert; enjoying time on my own, the thoughts in my head, and the friendship of a few carefully chosen people. A party is easier with someone to go with, and i never go a new place alone.

My Kasey is an extrovert; she loves everyone she meets, wants to talk all the time, wants to go/do/see everything, and always wants to be with me.

Yet...it works for us!

She gets me out and doing things, i give her the family eating popcorn by the fire, and she helps me be more involved with the world.

Because i am not working and she works from home there are few but precious alone times, but i make the most of them i can...reading, bird watching, napping etc...

So tell me, are you opposites? How do YOU make it work?

I'm a Gemini and my Love (of two years and going!!) is a Scorpio.

We are polar opposites. LOL.

I'm the introvert. My Love is the extrovert (with a generous dose of introversion). When we are together, it is H E A V E N on earth.

When we are apart, it is H E L L (but we have mad respect for each other, so we stay together more than we are apart).

[kittygrrl]

hmm, yes & no...in the b/f dynamic there is definitely a complementary difference that i appreciate..but that is not enough...i think sharing the same vision, politics, interests, sexual appetite, financial habits and (ideal)beliefs can make a heaven or hell........