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Old 03-28-2018, 02:16 AM   #21
Esme nha Maire
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Just a quick additional comment; I woke up fuzzy-headed with a slew of random stuff rattling around my brain when something from my past surfaced and I had a lightbulb moment: Dapper, I wasn't concerned about my lack of breasts until I hit my teens, at which point I became VERY upset that I wasn't devloping/hadn't developed them. And my lack of concern, when breasts did develop under the influence of oestrogen, mirrors the relative lack of concern re genitalia amongst FTMs. I'mthinking aloud here, but..

It's as if the brain is wired so that as long as there is a certain minimum amount of appropriate development in the one area, it doesn't get too upset, whereas too much development in the other makes it very unhappy. Which end causes distress from lack and which from excess is invese between the genders. And as you pointed out, the timing difference between MTFs and FTMs over when distress sets in is down to the 'normal' developmental processes causing problems early in MTF girls and late in FTM guys.

There's a kind of symmetry to that. My inner pattern-recognition geek is satisfied now :-}

Sigh - life. It's all so very complicated! And no user manuals! It's no wonder, given the over-simplistic view of life that was/is thrust at us early on that so many feel confused or distressed unless they are given suitable information or role models to help them understand that things aren't always simple!

There's a kind of symmetry to that
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Old 03-28-2018, 05:12 PM   #22
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Esme nha Maire,

Yes. It is when FTMs start to get breast growth that their distress goes off the charts. Meanwhile, it is the facial hair and muscle mass which triggers MTFs. That is why kids can no longer "hold it in", at adolescence. They just burst at that point.

I have heard many FTMs say they "never thought it would happen to them". They never thought they would menstruate, never thought they would grow breasts. It just didn't "make sense" to them that this would happen, so they assumed they wouldn't. And these are people that didn't know they were "boys"/trans, they just knew they weren't like the other girls, so it didn't make logical sense to them that they would become women. It's amazing how we can twist things around in our brains in order to reduce our emotional distress is amazing.
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Originally Posted by Esme nha Maire View Post

It's as if the brain is wired so that as long as there is a certain minimum amount of appropriate development in the one area, it doesn't get too upset, whereas too much development in the other makes it very unhappy. Which end causes distress from lack and which from excess is invese between the genders.
I like this thinking. You are suggesting that perhaps the reason that some FTMs do not have lower dysphoria is because getting top surgery is enough? Or, maybe you weren't saying that directly.

I can also tell you that you sometimes FTMs say that they didn't have lower dysphoria until after they had top surgery. It is like they start to become more conscious of another female part of their body after the most "womanly" thing about them is no longer there to focus on.
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Old 04-15-2018, 01:44 AM   #23
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Dapper, I wouldn't have a clue as to why some FTM's don't get bodily dysphoria regarding their genitals. I was just postulating a hypothesis which has a neat symmetry that makes sense to me!

That's interesting about FTM's thinking it'd never happen to them. I WISHED male bodily changes at puberty wouldn;t happen to me, but I knew absolutely that they would, and worried about it for years before it actually happened.

Regarding the change at one end affecting the perception at the other.. hmmn... there might even by some symmetry in that with MTF's too. The difficulty would in teasing out those who decided to have breast augmentation solely due to their internal feelings about how their body should be from those who did so due to societal pressure on women to look a certain way. I couldn't even begin to guess what proportion when I went through things even had breast augmentation, let alone have any idea as to why. This because my contact with other trans-women was fairly minimal - my membership of a nationwide support group was , for me, purely informational - how to get treatment, what to expect, possible ongoing issues. Medical problem, once sorted, that's it, job done, moving on... (if only life were THAT simple! 8-} ) But one chatted whilst in the waiting area with other patients... (shrugs)
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