Butch Femme Planet  

Go Back   Butch Femme Planet > FUN > The Fluffy Stuff: Flirting, Humor, Chat

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 08-04-2013, 07:10 AM   #1
Mopsie
Senior Member

How Do You Identify?:
Femme
Preferred Pronoun?:
Female ones
Relationship Status:
Single
 
Mopsie's Avatar
 
1 Highscore

Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Shenandoah Valley Virginia
Posts: 4,769
Thanks: 36,246
Thanked 8,588 Times in 1,857 Posts
Rep Power: 21474852
Mopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST Reputation
Smile Corny jokes

I work in mental health. My part time job is at a group home. One of the residents loves corny jokes. Everytime I come to work she has a new one to tell me. Then I tell her a corny joke back. I have now exhausted my knowledge of corny jokes. I know I could just google corny jokes but I thought a thread would be more fun!


So what are the corny jokes you know?
Mopsie is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 13 Users Say Thank You to Mopsie For This Useful Post:
Old 08-04-2013, 07:14 AM   #2
Mopsie
Senior Member

How Do You Identify?:
Femme
Preferred Pronoun?:
Female ones
Relationship Status:
Single
 
Mopsie's Avatar
 
1 Highscore

Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Shenandoah Valley Virginia
Posts: 4,769
Thanks: 36,246
Thanked 8,588 Times in 1,857 Posts
Rep Power: 21474852
Mopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST Reputation
Default

Here's a joke she told me yesterday:

There are two potatoes standing on a street corner.

How do you know which one is the prostitute?

Answer: The one wearing the sign "Idaho."

Mopsie is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 18 Users Say Thank You to Mopsie For This Useful Post:
Old 08-04-2013, 07:42 AM   #3
Wrang1er
Senior Member

How Do You Identify?:
Me, myself and I
 
1 Highscore

Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Here
Posts: 1,526
Thanks: 6,112
Thanked 7,085 Times in 1,355 Posts
Rep Power: 21474850
Wrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST Reputation
Default What did one hat say to the other hat?

You stay here. I'll go on a head.
Wrang1er is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 17 Users Say Thank You to Wrang1er For This Useful Post:
Old 08-04-2013, 07:45 AM   #4
Gaige
Senior Member

How Do You Identify?:
Stone Butch
 

Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: above my boots
Posts: 2,097
Thanks: 2,649
Thanked 3,756 Times in 1,171 Posts
Rep Power: 21474852
Gaige Has the BEST ReputationGaige Has the BEST ReputationGaige Has the BEST ReputationGaige Has the BEST ReputationGaige Has the BEST ReputationGaige Has the BEST ReputationGaige Has the BEST ReputationGaige Has the BEST ReputationGaige Has the BEST ReputationGaige Has the BEST ReputationGaige Has the BEST Reputation
Default

What’s Irish and stays out all night?

Pati-o furniture :-p


Gaige is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 14 Users Say Thank You to Gaige For This Useful Post:
Old 08-04-2013, 09:14 AM   #5
Hollylane
Practically Lives Here

How Do You Identify?:
.
Preferred Pronoun?:
.
Relationship Status:
.
 

Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: .
Posts: 11,495
Thanks: 34,694
Thanked 26,372 Times in 5,877 Posts
Rep Power: 21474860
Hollylane Has the BEST ReputationHollylane Has the BEST ReputationHollylane Has the BEST ReputationHollylane Has the BEST ReputationHollylane Has the BEST ReputationHollylane Has the BEST ReputationHollylane Has the BEST ReputationHollylane Has the BEST ReputationHollylane Has the BEST ReputationHollylane Has the BEST ReputationHollylane Has the BEST Reputation
Default Cute/fun thread Mopsie! :)

What does a mermaid wear to math class?

An algae-bra.
Hollylane is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 19 Users Say Thank You to Hollylane For This Useful Post:
Old 08-04-2013, 10:57 AM   #6
Cin
Senior Member

How Do You Identify?:
Butch
Preferred Pronoun?:
she
Relationship Status:
Truly Madly Deeply
 
2 Highscores

Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: In My Head
Posts: 2,805
Thanks: 6,326
Thanked 10,623 Times in 2,488 Posts
Rep Power: 21474851
Cin Has the BEST ReputationCin Has the BEST ReputationCin Has the BEST ReputationCin Has the BEST ReputationCin Has the BEST ReputationCin Has the BEST ReputationCin Has the BEST ReputationCin Has the BEST ReputationCin Has the BEST ReputationCin Has the BEST ReputationCin Has the BEST Reputation
Default

How do you make holy water?

You boil the hell out of it.
Cin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-04-2013, 11:35 AM   #7
always2late
Senior Member

How Do You Identify?:
Femme
Preferred Pronoun?:
m'lady
 
always2late's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: NJ
Posts: 2,000
Thanks: 1,834
Thanked 6,231 Times in 1,462 Posts
Rep Power: 21474853
always2late Has the BEST Reputationalways2late Has the BEST Reputationalways2late Has the BEST Reputationalways2late Has the BEST Reputationalways2late Has the BEST Reputationalways2late Has the BEST Reputationalways2late Has the BEST Reputationalways2late Has the BEST Reputationalways2late Has the BEST Reputationalways2late Has the BEST Reputationalways2late Has the BEST Reputation
Default

Two french fries were walking down the road, and one was a-salted.
__________________





Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field. I'll meet you there ~ Rumi
always2late is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 18 Users Say Thank You to always2late For This Useful Post:
Old 08-10-2013, 07:12 AM   #8
Mopsie
Senior Member

How Do You Identify?:
Femme
Preferred Pronoun?:
Female ones
Relationship Status:
Single
 
Mopsie's Avatar
 
1 Highscore

Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Shenandoah Valley Virginia
Posts: 4,769
Thanks: 36,246
Thanked 8,588 Times in 1,857 Posts
Rep Power: 21474852
Mopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST Reputation
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wrang1er View Post
You stay here. I'll go on a head.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gaige View Post
What’s Irish and stays out all night?

Pati-o furniture :-p


Quote:
Originally Posted by Hollylane View Post
What does a mermaid wear to math class?

An algae-bra.
I worked at my part time job last night. I told my client the first three jokes from this thread. She loved them! She laughed so hard I thought she was going to spit out her meds.

Thanks for all the jokes everybody - keep them coming!

Mopsie is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to Mopsie For This Useful Post:
Old 08-10-2013, 07:36 AM   #9
Wrang1er
Senior Member

How Do You Identify?:
Me, myself and I
 
1 Highscore

Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Here
Posts: 1,526
Thanks: 6,112
Thanked 7,085 Times in 1,355 Posts
Rep Power: 21474850
Wrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST Reputation
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mopsie View Post
I worked at my part time job last night. I told my client the first three jokes from this thread. She loved them! She laughed so hard I thought she was going to spit out her meds.

Thanks for all the jokes everybody - keep them coming!


Mopsie - knowing that makes this even better. Thanks for sharing.
Wrang1er is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Wrang1er For This Useful Post:
Old 08-04-2013, 01:41 PM   #10
VintageFemme
Senior Member

How Do You Identify?:
Femme
Relationship Status:
Single
 
VintageFemme's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Outside
Posts: 2,299
Thanks: 3,828
Thanked 7,641 Times in 1,657 Posts
Rep Power: 21474851
VintageFemme Has the BEST ReputationVintageFemme Has the BEST ReputationVintageFemme Has the BEST ReputationVintageFemme Has the BEST ReputationVintageFemme Has the BEST ReputationVintageFemme Has the BEST ReputationVintageFemme Has the BEST ReputationVintageFemme Has the BEST ReputationVintageFemme Has the BEST ReputationVintageFemme Has the BEST ReputationVintageFemme Has the BEST Reputation
Default =)

How do you catch a unique rabbit?
U nique up on it.
How do you catch a tame rabbit?
Tame way.
__________________
Unfinished Business & Open to Serendipity
VintageFemme is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 18 Users Say Thank You to VintageFemme For This Useful Post:
Old 08-04-2013, 02:27 PM   #11
Wrang1er
Senior Member

How Do You Identify?:
Me, myself and I
 
1 Highscore

Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Here
Posts: 1,526
Thanks: 6,112
Thanked 7,085 Times in 1,355 Posts
Rep Power: 21474850
Wrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST Reputation
Default

What did the mother buffalo say when her boy went off to college?

Bison!
Wrang1er is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 16 Users Say Thank You to Wrang1er For This Useful Post:
Old 08-04-2013, 02:31 PM   #12
Wrang1er
Senior Member

How Do You Identify?:
Me, myself and I
 
1 Highscore

Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Here
Posts: 1,526
Thanks: 6,112
Thanked 7,085 Times in 1,355 Posts
Rep Power: 21474850
Wrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST ReputationWrang1er Has the BEST Reputation
Default

How much does a pirate pay for corn?

A buccaneer.
Wrang1er is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 17 Users Say Thank You to Wrang1er For This Useful Post:
Old 08-04-2013, 03:17 PM   #13
stargazingboi
Senior Member

How Do You Identify?:
~
Preferred Pronoun?:
~
 
stargazingboi's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: ~
Posts: 1,954
Thanks: 10,392
Thanked 8,321 Times in 1,626 Posts
Rep Power: 21474852
stargazingboi Has the BEST Reputationstargazingboi Has the BEST Reputationstargazingboi Has the BEST Reputationstargazingboi Has the BEST Reputationstargazingboi Has the BEST Reputationstargazingboi Has the BEST Reputationstargazingboi Has the BEST Reputationstargazingboi Has the BEST Reputationstargazingboi Has the BEST Reputationstargazingboi Has the BEST Reputationstargazingboi Has the BEST Reputation
Default

What did one toilet say to the other toilet?

~You look flushed
stargazingboi is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 17 Users Say Thank You to stargazingboi For This Useful Post:
Old 08-04-2013, 03:32 PM   #14
Mopsie
Senior Member

How Do You Identify?:
Femme
Preferred Pronoun?:
Female ones
Relationship Status:
Single
 
Mopsie's Avatar
 
1 Highscore

Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Shenandoah Valley Virginia
Posts: 4,769
Thanks: 36,246
Thanked 8,588 Times in 1,857 Posts
Rep Power: 21474852
Mopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST ReputationMopsie Has the BEST Reputation
Default Here's another one my client told me last week ...


Q: What do you call a pig who takes karate lessons?

A: Pork chop!

(Said with appropriate accompanying hand gestures ... which made it cuter.)
Mopsie is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 14 Users Say Thank You to Mopsie For This Useful Post:
Old 08-06-2013, 11:33 AM   #15
nycfem
Moderator

How Do You Identify?:
femme sub
Preferred Pronoun?:
Baby Grrl
Relationship Status:
Attached
 
nycfem's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: NYC
Posts: 6,766
Thanks: 52,812
Thanked 21,723 Times in 5,081 Posts
Rep Power: 21474857
nycfem has disabled reputation
Default

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Why the long face?"
__________________
*****

How do I... ?
Check out the Members Helping Members thread:
http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/foru...embers+Helping
nycfem is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 13 Users Say Thank You to nycfem For This Useful Post:
Old 08-09-2013, 04:22 PM   #16
Blade
Infamous Member

How Do You Identify?:
TG
Preferred Pronoun?:
He
Relationship Status:
once in a while someone amazing comes along...and here I am!
 
Blade's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Down on the farm
Posts: 5,492
Thanks: 9,850
Thanked 14,399 Times in 4,049 Posts
Rep Power: 21474856
Blade Has the BEST ReputationBlade Has the BEST ReputationBlade Has the BEST ReputationBlade Has the BEST ReputationBlade Has the BEST ReputationBlade Has the BEST ReputationBlade Has the BEST ReputationBlade Has the BEST ReputationBlade Has the BEST ReputationBlade Has the BEST ReputationBlade Has the BEST Reputation
Default

what do you call a camel without any humps?

Humphrey
__________________
Yeah so what if I'm triple dipped in awesome sauce?

The best way to predict the future, is to create it.
Blade is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to Blade For This Useful Post:
Old 06-08-2014, 11:01 AM   #17
JustLovelyJenn
Senior Member

How Do You Identify?:
Femme
Preferred Pronoun?:
She/her
Relationship Status:
That's Need to Know
 
JustLovelyJenn's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Aberdeen, WA
Posts: 4,478
Thanks: 12,464
Thanked 13,995 Times in 3,685 Posts
Rep Power: 21474855
JustLovelyJenn Has the BEST ReputationJustLovelyJenn Has the BEST ReputationJustLovelyJenn Has the BEST ReputationJustLovelyJenn Has the BEST ReputationJustLovelyJenn Has the BEST ReputationJustLovelyJenn Has the BEST ReputationJustLovelyJenn Has the BEST ReputationJustLovelyJenn Has the BEST ReputationJustLovelyJenn Has the BEST ReputationJustLovelyJenn Has the BEST ReputationJustLovelyJenn Has the BEST Reputation
Default

__________________
--Jenn
JustLovelyJenn is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to JustLovelyJenn For This Useful Post:
Old 06-08-2014, 02:39 PM   #18
gotoseagrl
Senior Member

How Do You Identify?:
old-fashioned queer stone submissive girl
Preferred Pronoun?:
mermaid, *very* lucky babygirl
Relationship Status:
Saltwater mermaid ♡
 
gotoseagrl's Avatar
 

Join Date: May 2010
Location: CA
Posts: 2,209
Thanks: 5,192
Thanked 6,116 Times in 1,726 Posts
Rep Power: 21474852
gotoseagrl Has the BEST Reputationgotoseagrl Has the BEST Reputationgotoseagrl Has the BEST Reputationgotoseagrl Has the BEST Reputationgotoseagrl Has the BEST Reputationgotoseagrl Has the BEST Reputationgotoseagrl Has the BEST Reputationgotoseagrl Has the BEST Reputationgotoseagrl Has the BEST Reputationgotoseagrl Has the BEST Reputationgotoseagrl Has the BEST Reputation
Default

Patient: Doctor, I think I need glasses!
Waiter: You certainly do, this is a restaurant!

Patient: Doctor, I feel like a pony!
Doctor: Don't worry, you're just a little hoarse!
__________________
Be still when you have nothing to say; when genuine passion moves you, say what you've got to say, and say it hot. D. H. Lawrence

gotoseagrl is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 11 Users Say Thank You to gotoseagrl For This Useful Post:
Old 06-08-2014, 04:38 PM   #19
Happy_Go_Lucky
Member

How Do You Identify?:
OFOS Butch who desires femme company.
Preferred Pronoun?:
Handsome devil you.
 
Happy_Go_Lucky's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Anywhere I want to be
Posts: 676
Thanks: 3,190
Thanked 3,359 Times in 626 Posts
Rep Power: 21474848
Happy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST Reputation
Default

__________________
Hair Pulling...... not just for preschoolers.
Happy_Go_Lucky is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Happy_Go_Lucky For This Useful Post:
Old 06-09-2014, 05:25 AM   #20
Happy_Go_Lucky
Member

How Do You Identify?:
OFOS Butch who desires femme company.
Preferred Pronoun?:
Handsome devil you.
 
Happy_Go_Lucky's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Anywhere I want to be
Posts: 676
Thanks: 3,190
Thanked 3,359 Times in 626 Posts
Rep Power: 21474848
Happy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST ReputationHappy_Go_Lucky Has the BEST Reputation
Default

__________________
Hair Pulling...... not just for preschoolers.
Happy_Go_Lucky is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to Happy_Go_Lucky For This Useful Post:
Reply

Tags
jokes

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 02:19 AM.


ButchFemmePlanet.com
All information copyright of BFP 2018