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Old 12-30-2009, 10:40 PM   #1
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Default What do you want?

Seems like people have a fairly good grasp on what they don't want but often times fail to address the things they really do want in a partner and/or relationship.

Think about it, put it out there - what DO you want?
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Old 12-30-2009, 10:43 PM   #2
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I want trust and loyalty. I want to be able to be my quirky self always. I want my friends and lovers to not run away from my different-abilities. I want to live voraciously TODAY and know that when my illness wins, those that love me will continue to love me and my Adele-isms.

Lucky for me I have these things. I am always open for applications. I promise to not ask for that which I am not willing to give. I promise to love you back for eternity. Be it mine or yours.
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Old 12-30-2009, 10:52 PM   #3
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I want trust and loyalty. I want to be able to be my quirky self always. I want my friends and lovers to not run away from my different-abilities. I want to live voraciously TODAY and know that when my illness wins, those that love me will continue to love me and my Adele-isms.

Lucky for me I have these things. I am always open for applications. I promise to not ask for that which I am not willing to give. I promise to love you back for eternity. Be it mine or yours.
Nice SF. Wouldn't it be grand that no one should ever need to start off a list of "want" with two things that should be standard - trust and loyalty.
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Old 12-30-2009, 10:55 PM   #4
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I want respect and trust and faith in me and us as a cohesive unit. I want freedom to be myself and understanding during the times that I am not so wonderful. I want laughter and wit and brilliance. I want the patience of a saint and the integrity of a hero. Hell, I want a hero. And I want to be his heroine.
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Old 12-30-2009, 10:58 PM   #5
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I want respect and trust and faith in me and us as a cohesive unit. I want freedom to be myself and understanding during the times that I am not so wonderful. I want laughter and wit and brilliance. I want the patience of a saint and the integrity of a hero. Hell, I want a hero. And I want to be his heroine.
Great. Now I have that dang I Want A Hero song in my head.

Sounds great otherwise.
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Old 12-30-2009, 11:13 PM   #6
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Nice SF. Wouldn't it be grand that no one should ever need to start off a list of "want" with two things that should be standard - trust and loyalty.

The thing is this. I have falsely assumed that I had those things. Until it became glaringly clear that I didn't. I have never in my life felt so *safe* (in a non boring way) before I married Cal (Plato on this site).

I have also forged friendships amongst Femmes that make me feel equally safe. I cherish that. Having people travel across the country whilst I am in the ICU rambling feverishly at them about utterly non-sensical things restored my faith in Femme Alliances that I needed/wanted but was scared to death of after walking away from psuedo friendships that left scars so deep I thought I'd never let another penetrate. Loyalty and Trust are oft espoused by people in theory, but in practice the selfish "what's in it for me?" mode seems to win out.

I married somebody who knows my quirks, past history, familial strife and doesn't judge me. Instead this person is my rock and my anchor. We are a team. Silly perhaps, but I've not had that before. I cherish it.
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Old 12-31-2009, 12:13 AM   #7
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Great. Now I have that dang I Want A Hero song in my head.

Sounds great otherwise.
Any time I can help!
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Old 12-31-2009, 04:47 PM   #8
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I want respect and trust and faith in me and us as a cohesive unit. I want freedom to be myself and understanding during the times that I am not so wonderful. I want laughter and wit and brilliance. I want the patience of a saint and the integrity of a hero. Hell, I want a hero. And I want to be his heroine.

Oh. My. Gawd. I've never seen a better description of Gryph, and our relationship.

I'm betting Ryan is very much like him... May you have what you want, Gemme. It's totally worth the wait!

*and here I thought I wouldn't have anything to say in this thread!*
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Old 12-31-2009, 05:00 PM   #9
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I want to know that in their eyes, I am the best girl in the room, no matter who else is in it. I want to be able to always look into their eyes and see love there, even when those eyes have faded. I want someone I can depend on, because they will always be able to depend on me. I want someone who can love me despite my flaws, its in my flaws that you can see me for who I am, and who does not expect me to be perfect. I want someone who can accept being loved in return. I want someone who will hold me when I cry and not mock my tears, stand with me when my back is against the wall, calm me when I rage, rejoice with me when I laugh, and dance with me in the rain. I want honesty, and truth, and respect, and the freedom to love, and be loved, unconditionally.
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Old 12-31-2009, 08:23 PM   #10
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Oh. My. Gawd. I've never seen a better description of Gryph, and our relationship.

I'm betting Ryan is very much like him... May you have what you want, Gemme. It's totally worth the wait!

*and here I thought I wouldn't have anything to say in this thread!*

I think you may be right about Gryph and Ryan being cut from the same cloth.
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Old 01-10-2010, 10:16 AM   #11
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This morning I was thinking about my past pursuits in finding a relationship. I don't really look, per se but I do open myself up to it. In the past I'd post these lengthy online personals and when ask what I wanted I's have this long list.

I've learned over the years that no matter your list there are always exceptions to the rule and your needs change based on circumstances. I know that what I want today is different then what I thought I wanted 5 years ago.

We all want honesty, trust and loyalty. They shouldn't even have to go in a list. Funny how often we all put them there any way.

I'm a little torn right now. On one had I want to open myself up to the universe and let whatever happens happen. To trust that if I love myself, trust that they best circumstance will happen that the right partner will come into my life.

On the other hand maybe I should be more proactive and constructive with finding a partner. That if I want to manifest this reality I need to know exactly what I'm asking for but can I really do this? Do I even know what i really want? lol

I am an attractive woman- strong, independent, intelligent, articulate and a loyal partner. I think there are many of us here with these same qualities. I often wonder why so many are single. I know its not easy when you're a subculture within a subculture- BF, but damn, it just seems like the biggest mountain, at least for me.
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Old 05-07-2011, 03:53 AM   #12
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- Someone who no matter how busy their live is, makes time for me in some way or another
- Honesty and respect
- Someone who realize that "success" doesn't always have to have a monetary value.
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Old 05-07-2011, 10:50 AM   #13
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All the things everyone else has listed..and..someone who understands that friends/family/debt/trials and tribulations of all sorts will always come and go..but in the end bottom line is when the dust settles it will always be them and I left standing side by side to take on any and all challenges...when all is said and done it is "us against the world" Doesn't sound complicated does it? You would be amazed. A 100/100 relationship..I give 100% and they give 100%.
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Old 05-08-2011, 04:05 AM   #14
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I wish my most recent ex could have realized that.
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Old 05-08-2011, 10:31 AM   #15
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This says it all

http://youtu.be/05qcA4KPI0k
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Old 05-08-2011, 10:42 AM   #16
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ok a year later and a lot wiser...

I want an intelligent, conscious human being who knows who they are without getting caught up in labels. Someone that enjoys the dynamic and makes me feel like I'm the only girl in the world. Someone that LOVES gardening and cooking. Someone's who's idea of a perfect day is sitting on the porch watching our fur babies play, watching and teaching grandkids about life. Someone that doesn't have to think about doing the right thing.. it just happens. Someone who wants to work at being healthy and strong enough to spend the rest of our golden years together.
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Old 05-08-2011, 10:44 AM   #17
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I want trust, honor, loyalty, honesty, intellegence and laughter.

I want someone who sees me for who I am... beautiful, ugly, strong, weak.. Might not like all of me, but loves all of me and wouldn't change a thing.

I want conversations that last for days
I want to like someone so much that I have to go find them if I haven't seen them in twenty mins, just to see their face and say hi...
I want someone secure enought to know that one day I will miss them and then the next day tell them to go away...

I want the security of knowing that if I'm alive in twenty years, they are going to be charging up my rascal and finding my other shoe...

I got lucky... or did I? Did I luck out or did I say what I wanted and get it?
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Old 05-12-2011, 04:34 AM   #18
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wants someone who loves cuddling as much as I do
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Old 05-24-2011, 09:09 AM   #19
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In my journey to find the love of my life. (And yes, i'm still searching.) I have noticed that I want trust. I want us to keep no secrets from each other, as honesty creates some stability. I want her to be able to look at my flaws, and i look at hers and know the person hiding behind this wall of them is the person that is who they are in love with. Also, I want someone real. I've had way to many girls use me as a pawn in their game, or they were just fake. I want someone who has true emotions, and when she says them, it's what she really feels, and it's not a script. I want someone who is going to love me uncondtionally and love me for who I am. I refuse to be someone's mold. And, whenever possible and just when they need me to, I want to be their hero.
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Old 05-24-2011, 09:30 AM   #20
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I want more time in the day, but that's something I need to work on.

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