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Old 11-22-2009, 09:03 PM   #41
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sassy_dee View Post
I am completely outraged!

I cannot believe that after Morningstar ( yes a lovely member of OUR community ) apologized TWICE for posting something SOME people find offensive that she was still beat up over it. So it becomes a free for all?
Lets all pretend to be therapists and *counsel* the poster. WTF !!!!! Must be nice to live in glass houses.

I see LOTS of things done in the name of humor that are offensive, IMO.
Hell Wanda Sykes offended the hell out of me last night, I didn't beat her up because it was not funny IN MY OPINION. Some people probably thought she was hilarious.

I see LOTS of posts that I find offensive on ALL of the BF sites.. so I skip over them. I don't beat up the person who posted it! If its "not my cup of tea" I skip over it and I do LOTS of skipping.

Seeing that causes rape and sexual abuse? WTF is that about? I assure you that seeing that video does not *turn* someone into a rapist.

Morningstar I am very sorry this happened to you and I do believe if you were one of the *cool kids * this would NOT have happened to you.

Please don't stop trying to bring lighthearted humor to us. I find you a breath of fresh air among those of us that are wound up just too goddamn tight

Let's not escalate this experience to "outrage" or an insistence that "seeing that causes rape" (because that is NOT what was said at ALL.)

It should be seen as an act of respect and love that people who felt offended were willing to tell Morningstar how they felt without anger, malice, or holier-than-thou. I see people wanting to connect here - extending a hand to say "Help me understand you". THAT is powerful.

We will also not be "skipping over" sexism on this site. We will be working together as a community to combat it.

I also want to comment on this "cool kids" thing. Morningstar IS a "cool kid" in my book. She is a funny, thoughtful, warm person and I dont think we are doing her any service by implying that she is not just as valid or important as everyone else on this site.
We are NOT NOT NOT going to start building this high-school club in our heads where people start insisting that anyone who doesnt agree with them is a "cool kid" and thus, immune from being asked to explain themselves.
Every single person on this site is fucking awesome, there isnt a single person here who is better than or worth more than anyone else BUT if we say something that someone is finding offensive, then we should ALL be willing to answer for why we said it. Myself included.

We all make mistakes. I think pretty highly of anyone who is willing to say "Hey, my bad" and take the chance to learn from that experience.
I also want to make sure that I am clear when I say that nobody asked Morningstar to apologize for anything, they asked her to explain why she felt it was funny. There is a HUGE difference there. Asking for an apology says, "Hey, you OWE me something" and asking for an explanation says, "I respect you and want to hear what you have to say".
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Old 11-22-2009, 09:09 PM   #42
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Old 11-22-2009, 09:19 PM   #43
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Legendryder View Post
Wow. I gotta go look at those new smilies!! I love that dead horse one.

yes exactly

Morningstar loves horses, she hasn't to my knowledge asked why we may find that smilie offensive, not once.


Its a matter of opinion and in MY opinion if this is up for debate open a new thread and get the hell off of the original poster of this thread.

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Old 11-22-2009, 09:23 PM   #44
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I also want to comment on this "cool kids" thing. Morningstar IS a "cool kid" in my book. She is a funny, thoughtful, warm person and I dont think we are doing her any service by implying that she is not just as valid or important as everyone else on this site.
We are NOT NOT NOT going to start building this high-school club in our heads where people start insisting that anyone who doesnt agree with them is a "cool kid" and thus, immune from being asked to explain themselves.
Every single person on this site is fucking awesome, there isnt a single person here who is better than or worth more than anyone else BUT if we say something that someone is finding offensive, then we should ALL be willing to answer for why we said it. Myself included.

Medusa, this was very well said. I want to thank you. As someone who has had that "cool kid" epitaph used against me as a way of marginalizing me, thank you a thousand times for addressing that.

Just because someone posts a lot or has an opinion that others agree with does not make them a "cool kid". It makes them someone who expresses themselves verbally.

I could go on about this subject and bare a lot of my soul, but right now I am not feeling safe because of this comment--so I won't.

Why is it that in an effort to protect (and does Barb need protection?) someone, we have to attack others.
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Old 11-22-2009, 09:29 PM   #45
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sassy_dee View Post
yes exactly

Morningstar loves horses, she hasn't to my knowledge asked why we may find that smilie offensive, not once.


Its a matter of opinion and in MY opinion if this is up for debate open a new thread and get the hell off of the original poster of this thread.

Just for argument's sake, the dead horse emoticon is not offensive to me because it refers to the expression, "You're beating a dead horse." It actually implies it is useless to beat a dead horse because, well, it's already dead. Idiomatically, it refers to someone who will not let a "dead" topic go.

beating a dead horse
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Old 11-22-2009, 09:39 PM   #46
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Originally Posted by blush View Post
Just for argument's sake, the dead horse emoticon is not offensive to me because it refers to the expression, "You're beating a dead horse." It actually implies it is useless to beat a dead horse because, well, it's already dead. Idiomatically, it refers to someone who will not let a "dead" topic go.

beating a dead horse

Thank you for that very insulting explanation of a cliche. I am well aware of what it means. Maybe the visual of a dead horse is offensive to me. Because its meant to be funny.. its ok.

Arwen, with all due respect you called someone in this thread a misogynistic jerk. I would venture to say that probably felt like an attack.

Damn right I defended Barb.

Now I'm done, completely. I am sad.
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Old 11-22-2009, 09:43 PM   #47
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Sassy, please point out to me where I said that Dean was a misogynistic jerk. Here, I'll quote what I said.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Arwen View Post

So which is it, Dean? Are you a thinking, caring butch or are you the misogynistic jerk you have portrayed yourself as here?
Do you see that I asked him which he was? That I said it was what he himself portrayed himself to be?

I really really really dislike being misquoted. Please make sure you know EXACTLY what it is you are accusing me of before doing so.

With all due respect, of course.
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Old 11-22-2009, 09:46 PM   #48
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Sassy,

I am going to ask you to step back from this thread before posting again. I am feeling your high emotion coming through in your words and it appears to me that you are no longer "hearing" what people are saying.

Thanks.
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Old 11-22-2009, 09:49 PM   #49
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sassy_dee View Post
Thank you for that very insulting explanation of a cliche. I am well aware of what it means. Maybe the visual of a dead horse is offensive to me. Because its meant to be funny.. its ok.

Arwen, with all due respect you called someone in this thread a misogynistic jerk. I would venture to say that probably felt like an attack.

Damn right I defended Barb.

Now I'm done, completely. I am sad.
I didn't mean to insult you. I didn't know how common that expression was or if it might be a more regional one. If my tone seemed snarky, I apologize. It really was not my intent.
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Old 11-22-2009, 09:51 PM   #50
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*screeching sound of rubber (bottom of my Chuck's) smokin' the pavement*. At first I thought I was in the wrong thread. I'd better go to page 1.
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Old 11-22-2009, 10:05 PM   #51
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Hmmm. Well I haven't read anything that would hypnotize me yet, but damn, look at that selection of smiles...smilies...smi
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Old 11-22-2009, 10:11 PM   #52
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That is so strange the way that ass wiggles back and forth depending on the way you click it.
Hypnotic? Yes, it kinda is! Haha!

I see that many have expressed grave upset at all images of disembodied female asses, and I respect that. There certainly are a lot of disembodied female asses online aren't there? Disembodied cleavage too.

Even so, hypnotic clicky disembodied asses are just amusing, whether that is a female ass, or a male ass, or a disembodied monkey ass. Asses are just inherently funny. (To me). I don't think that makes me sexist.

Morningstar I hope you and others will not be afraid to post even lightly humorous threads for fear of being flamed. You gave me a smile with your thread and it did not offend me.
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Old 11-22-2009, 10:19 PM   #53
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Just for the record...



The horses, deer and all the critters here are "my friends"... I "godbless" road kill to cope.

I said "I do not care for the horse getting beat" emoticon "at all". I never said I found it offensive. (Nor that I felt it shouldn't be there.) And I said I was glad that there were groups like PETA. Plus, someone else said they "loved" that emoticon. I was thus simply expressing that there was a good example how varying our personalities are.

I didn't mean to "tie" it in with the shaking rump video, but perhaps one could do that, if they wish to - like an analogy of sorts. Sure, why not?!

But, I was responding to two things: the animal/PETA comments, and then the topic of sexism and how that impacts our ability to function well here in our community and how people hurt, (including opening poster's pain as well, if it was there). Well, I think I made that clear. I felt supportive of Morning and thought I relayed that fairly well.

Hope I'm not being misunderstood here. I'm starting to get paranoid writing!

You all know how "protective" I get. I mostly try and respond/post kindly and respectfully, and here in this instance, I truly was. Sorry, if anyone is hurt by my posts.

I am just a pussycat, really.





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Old 11-22-2009, 10:21 PM   #54
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Thread closed - Let's move on.
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