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04-14-2011, 05:43 AM
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#41 |
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Member
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Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
Serene Highness ;} Relationship Status:
Dreamily contemplating some outrage against conventional morality 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Houston area
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Stuff that has worked for me
Embrace and encourage individual interests and adventures for both yourself and your partner. You are not conjoined twins, by maintaining your difference you increase limerence and it helps keep conversation interesting.
Get away every once in awhile and have an adventure (esp in long term relationships). You need to get out in the world and see each other interacting with said world, this helps remind you why you love the person in the first place. Have sex in new ways and new places, resist the rut that leads to boredom that steals your heat. Have sex in a new room in the house, try a new position, shake it up. You don't have to get all crazy (unless you want to) but try new things. Do physical things together, wrestle, dance, walk, by connecting physically (other than sexually) it helps build new neural paths and strengthens your bond. When talking about emotional issues try to stay open and in the present moment. Really listen to what your partner is saying, even if it is hard for you to hear, even if you want to jump in and defend yourself, even if you think they are wrong, wrong, wrong. Just listen and support them, your time to talk will come and you will find the situation less combative if they feel genuinely heard and accepted. Both parties should practice this and believe me you will get better at it over time (it takes practice). Try reflecting back what you are hearing, e.g. "I hear you are frustrated because you feel like when I don't empty the dishwasher I am taking you for granted." Agree to fight fair, have ground rules and stick to them, better yet write them down so it can remain an objective touch stone. When you fuck up, genuinely apologize and make it right as much as you can. Remember no one is perfect and it is difficult to make changes. Remove the sawdust in your eye before you gun for the log in someone else's. Maintain yourself, your body, your mind, your spirit or soul, your credit score. There is nothing wrong with maintaining a little mystery and there is everything to gain by loving yourself and engaging in good strong self care.
__________________
. "I need no warrant for being, and no word of sanction upon my being. I am the warrant and the sanction. " Ayn Rand, Anthem "So you'll die happily for your sins. You'd rather die in guilt then live in love?" Timothy Leary Last edited by Venus007; 04-14-2011 at 05:46 AM. Reason: forgot a pearl o' wisdom, lol |
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04-14-2011, 05:46 AM
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#42 | |
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Practically Lives Here
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dee Relationship Status:
Hitched up 
Join Date: Nov 2009
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Quote:
Anything less is an UNtruth and deceitful |
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04-14-2011, 05:48 AM
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#43 |
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Guest
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Have your life, her life and our life! |
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04-14-2011, 07:30 AM
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#44 |
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Practically Lives Here
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dee Relationship Status:
Hitched up
Join Date: Nov 2009
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lessons learned
Talk about goals, where you are heading, where you want to be in the future if you plan a future with someone, winging it doesn't work.
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04-14-2011, 08:00 AM
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#45 |
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Infamous Member
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femme ones Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Tennessee
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Romance. Romance. Romance.
Take the time. It is important. Oh and for sure learn to let go and laugh about silly things. Random little everyday things.
__________________
~ I've learned that people will forget what you said,
people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. ~ Maya Angelou |
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04-14-2011, 08:02 AM
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#46 |
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Practically Lives Here
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dee Relationship Status:
Hitched up
Join Date: Nov 2009
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Respect each other's bathroom privacy!
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04-14-2011, 08:04 AM
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#47 |
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MILLION $$$ PUSSY
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Kinky, Raw, Perverted, Uber Queer Alpha Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
Iconic Ms. Relationship Status:
Keeper of 3, only one has the map to my freckles 
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Respect
Listen Talk Laugh Fuck Comfort
__________________
"If you’re going to play these dirty games of ours, then you might as well indulge completely. It’s all about turning back into an animal and that’s the beauty of it. Place your guilt on the sidewalk and take a blow torch to it (guilt is usually worthless anyway). Be perverted, be filthy, do things that mannered people shouldn’t do. If you’re going to be gross then go for it and don’t wimp out."---Master Aiden   |
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04-14-2011, 08:28 AM
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#48 |
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Member
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Queer femme submissive Relationship Status:
Married Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: UK
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No matter how mad you are, reach out and touch - literally - just before you go to sleep.
There is nothing as lonely or as crazy making as being in bed next to the person you love but being too hurt/proud/indignant to ask for a hug. Don't make them ask. Just do it. Words |
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04-14-2011, 08:33 AM
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#49 | |
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Practically Lives Here
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dee Relationship Status:
Hitched up
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Quote:
I'm the opposite, I don't want to be hugged or hug if I am mad. I just want to be left the hell alone, maybe I've been doing it wrong all these years. |
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04-14-2011, 08:45 AM
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#50 | |
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Member
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Queer femme submissive Relationship Status:
Married Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: UK
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Quote:
Me? I need some kind of physical contact just before W/we go to sleep regardless of who's mad with the other. Nothing sexual, just a 'so okay, one of us is mad now but it'll all be okay in the morning' kind of touch. And, to be honest, nine times out of ten it is. Words |
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04-14-2011, 08:55 AM
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#51 |
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Senior Member
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Me... Preferred Pronoun?:
... Relationship Status:
<3 myself 
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Touch me...
with words... your hand... your lips... your heart... Touch me deep into my soul... |
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04-14-2011, 09:24 AM
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#52 |
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Pink Confection
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She, Her, Ma'am Relationship Status:
Dating Myself 
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Be nice to me
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04-14-2011, 09:29 AM
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#53 |
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Senior Member
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With my souls eyes. Preferred Pronoun?:
He Relationship Status:
lol Join Date: Nov 2009
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Give random back rubs, foot rubs, kisses.
Make decisions together after you discuss them. Be there for your mate. Realize that some days you will not like each other and that is fine. Try not to go to bed upset with each other. Release the bad energy before the new day starts. Always be honest and have good intentions. There are plenty more things but I am lazy and I don't want to type them.
__________________
In Lak'ech Ala K'in I'm a Soul Rebel  http://wannabereverend.wordpress.com/ Spirituality is not a belief system or ideology, it is the surrender of one's ego to the infinite wisdom and knowledge that is the universe. |
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04-14-2011, 09:53 AM
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#54 |
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Member
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Unabashed Feminine Lesbian Preferred Pronoun?:
Her, She Relationship Status:
Married! Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Upstate NY
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Find joy in each other's joy.
Take affection as willingly as you give it. Encourage each other to new heights. Make the most of the day-to-day moments together. Treat each other with respect and kindness. Communicate and tell the truth. Never use each other as excuses for unhappiness. Bring me tea when I'm tired.
__________________
In the flush of love's light we dare be brave And suddenly we see that love costs all we are and will ever be. Yet it is only love which sets us free. Maya Angelou Wedding Photos: https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?...1&l=22b092b98c
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04-14-2011, 10:17 AM
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#55 |
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Senior Member
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Northwest Wind and Lake Michigan Preferred Pronoun?:
Paesano Relationship Status:
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If you are thinking maybe I should breakup with her/him-you should.
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04-14-2011, 06:55 PM
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#56 | |
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Infamous Member
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=)  Join Date: Nov 2009
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hugs
Quote:
__________________
I don't want to spend my life with someone I can live with, I want to spend my life with someone I can't live without. |
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04-14-2011, 07:31 PM
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#57 | |
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Practically Lives Here
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dee Relationship Status:
Hitched up
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Quote:
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04-14-2011, 07:40 PM
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#58 | |
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Infamous Member
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Hy (Pronounced He) Relationship Status:
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Quote:
Hey now, that's what I am talking about!
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Sometimes you don't realize your own strength until you come face to face with your greatest weakness. - Susan Gale |
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04-14-2011, 08:04 PM
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#59 | |
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Infamous Member
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she Relationship Status:
Married 
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hide the horse until the ceremony is over...
Quote:
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Pole bachit, a lis chuye.
The field sees, the forest hears |
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04-14-2011, 08:07 PM
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#60 |
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Infamous Member
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she Relationship Status:
Married
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when you are really angry with me....so angry with me...walk over and touch my face lovingly...so I know that even thru the anger you love me...that even tho we are angry, the moment is just a moment and not a rock that shatters the mirror upon which we look at each other....
and I...I shall do the same for you....
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Pole bachit, a lis chuye.
The field sees, the forest hears |
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