02-02-2012, 08:47 PM | #201 |
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02-06-2012, 12:07 AM | #202 |
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From the Super Bowl on screen information....
"The Tight End Comparison"
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02-15-2012, 07:29 PM | #203 |
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"Your zipper just went in my eye"
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02-18-2012, 09:27 PM | #204 |
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HAHAHHAHAHAHHAH
Its butter,,,its not a medicine,,,its a condiment
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02-18-2012, 11:57 PM | #205 |
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"I could probably still do it, with a pole that had the right length and weight..."
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02-20-2012, 06:18 PM | #206 |
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"you need to go get yourself a new nipple
the one that's on there now is old, worn out and no good" |
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02-20-2012, 07:02 PM | #207 |
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As seen posted in the produce department:
"ripe for tonight" |
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02-21-2012, 09:34 PM | #208 |
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Said during a meeting of "Professionals" at work today...
"We really need to troll around, and then present this in a vanilla way"
and... "You're really only looking at his package" |
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02-25-2012, 02:41 PM | #209 |
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heard on a local news segment this morning describing the winter fest:
"thousands of holes have been drilled this morning." yes, my depraved mind did indeed go there. |
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02-25-2012, 03:29 PM | #210 |
Timed Out
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Overheard my roomie on the phone yesterday...
"you wanna pull on my nut?" |
02-25-2012, 03:32 PM | #211 |
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I'm dating myself. It's really working out. I think I'm the one!!! Join Date: Jan 2012
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Overheard in my sister's kitchen . . . " I want the ball sauce on my pasta."
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03-03-2012, 12:39 PM | #212 |
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At the grocery store...
"Actually, it took me longer because I'm talking to you, usually I'd be in and out pretty quickly...."
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03-03-2012, 01:04 PM | #213 |
Timed Out
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"It was pretty sticky when I touched it."
Overheard thru the curtain in the ER last night. |
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03-05-2012, 11:23 AM | #214 |
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Spoken by Chris Harrison (of The Bachelorette fame) while guest hosting on Access Hollywood Live and in reference to a performer appearing on SNL:
"He does a great show and his bits are phenomenal." |
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03-05-2012, 03:26 PM | #215 |
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"Oh, I almost fell on your lips"
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I'm not tall enough to ride emotional roller coasters
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03-05-2012, 04:27 PM | #216 |
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After removing items from my bag:
Clerk "do you need a bag today" Same observant clerk "you realize you are wearing two different ear rings" Me "every day"
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Do not follow where the path may lead.
Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail. Muriel Strode |
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03-07-2012, 01:41 AM | #217 |
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"It's not going to be a long list, I'm not over-packing this year, I can't, I'm flying"
"When you pack stuff that you end up not using, or wearing...Of course you don't know that while you're packing, you think..Well...I might wear that, and it does give you other wardrobe opportunities..." |
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03-12-2012, 10:14 PM | #218 |
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"If I have dry hands, I may just go over and get a couple squirts..."
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03-21-2012, 09:51 AM | #219 |
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I am sure this is not an unexpected post...
"They just don't make them wieners long enough."
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03-21-2012, 04:39 PM | #220 |
Timed Out - Permanent
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"You can't poke it gently. You have to stick it in hard in order for the stuff to come out"
Overheard conversation about breaking the seal on a new tube of super glue. |
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