Where do I meet potential dates??

Jrio91 · 11-15-2013, 02:35 AM

Hello all!

I'm having a little trouble meeting people here in Spokane, WA. The LGBT community here doesn't seem very big whatsoever. =\ I'm kind of new to the lesbian dating scene though, having only come out this summer. I look like a girly straight girl so that may be one of my problems lol.

I was hoping for a little advice on where to go to meet people. Or does anyone know any good lesbian dating apps/sites I could try? Or is anyone also from Spokane or nearby? Let's get a drink!

lol I just feel like since coming out my love life is at an all time low and I am not ok with this! Help?

caffeinelover · 12-09-2013, 05:19 PM

Hi,

I've noticed no one replied to your post so I'm diving in. I'm a middle aged sexy, beautiful femme and even though I live in a big city have also a problem with meeting people.

The LGBT community can be a daunting place if you are not "visible" as a lesbian and are just coming out.I'd think this website is a good place to start exploring possibilities.

I empathize with the feeling of coming out and feeling like your love life is doomed because of geography. However, all you need is the one good person for you.Maybe going to meetups will help or just following some interests of yours will lead you to the right person.

Good luck!

ProfPacker · 12-09-2013, 06:22 PM

I feel the same way. I have tried online dating sites but the jury is still out. I think because I just want to date. I haven't been on the market for 34 years so in addition to the fact that I am older than many are looking for I have no idea how to flirt or start a conservation in a bar, etc. Always been a bit of a wallflower. I live in NJ and even though I have access to NYC it seems a little daunting

Bad_boi · 12-09-2013, 07:20 PM

To me it seems online and bars are the best bet as far as the Evergreen state is concerned. If you are lucky you can end up meeting someone someplace random.

TruTexan · 08-22-2015, 04:56 PM

BUMPED.......................

homoe · 08-22-2015, 05:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TruTexan

BUMPED.......................

City Jails, County lock ups, and probation officers offices

TruTexan · 08-22-2015, 05:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by homoe

City Jails, County lock ups, and probation officers offices

lmao homoe go for it !

Shystonefem · 08-22-2015, 05:48 PM

It isn't easy. Being femme makes it even harder. I feel that, if you are a femme, you have to be the one to start up the conversation. You have to let the person you are interested in actually get the idea that you are interested.

I feel like butches have an easier time meeting people because they are not invisible (most often).

I don't do that starting the conversation thing. Lol. I am really just too shy.

imperfect_cupcake · 08-22-2015, 06:02 PM

Okcupid and POF have quite a few in Spokane. I've even been contacted by a couple butches in Spokane (im in Canada) because the Butches I've talked to find it hard to figure out. Considering Spokane was listed in Autostradle as a total dyke city (from their survey response) kind of makes you despair that all the dykes are home, sitting on their couches wondering where each other is!!!
Try meetups as well, it's a website/app that gets local groups of people together. And if you don't see what you want, start a group in meetups yourself. I'm going to as soon as school is finished and I have time to be a hostess to a group (show up at every meeting for the first year)
I started one in Oxford and I had to leave just as it got underway

Hominid · 08-22-2015, 06:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shystonefem

It isn't easy. Being femme makes it even harder. I feel that, if you are a femme, you have to be the one to start up the conversation. You have to let the person you are interested in actually get the idea that you are interested.

I feel like butches have an easier time meeting people because they are not invisible (most often).

I don't do that starting the conversation thing. Lol. I am really just too shy.

Kind of funny, actually. Well-post testosterone FtMs are in the same boat as femmes!

randrum · 08-22-2015, 09:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shystonefem

I feel like butches have an easier time meeting people because they are not invisible (most often).

I don't do that starting the conversation thing. Lol. I am really just too shy.

I tend to be invisible. Or maybe it's more oblivious.

But I definitely relate to the shy thing. I have trouble starting conversations.

Especially with an attractive femme. I get all tongue tied. And that suave butch I like to think I am ends up looking like a stumbling idiot.

11-15-2013, 02:35 AM	#1
Jrio91 Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Her, She Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Aug 2012 Location: Washington Posts: 79 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 35 Thanked 219 Times in 46 Posts Rep Power: 4265140	Where do I meet potential dates?? Hello all! I'm having a little trouble meeting people here in Spokane, WA. The LGBT community here doesn't seem very big whatsoever. =\ I'm kind of new to the lesbian dating scene though, having only come out this summer. I look like a girly straight girl so that may be one of my problems lol. I was hoping for a little advice on where to go to meet people. Or does anyone know any good lesbian dating apps/sites I could try? Or is anyone also from Spokane or nearby? Let's get a drink! lol I just feel like since coming out my love life is at an all time low and I am not ok with this! Help?

12-09-2013, 05:19 PM	#2
caffeinelover Junior Member How Do You Identify?: ------------------ Preferred Pronoun?: ------------------------- Relationship Status: -------------------------- Join Date: Sep 2013 Location: -------------------- Posts: 18 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 40 Thanked 65 Times in 15 Posts Rep Power: 429508	Hello Hi, I've noticed no one replied to your post so I'm diving in. I'm a middle aged sexy, beautiful femme and even though I live in a big city have also a problem with meeting people. The LGBT community can be a daunting place if you are not "visible" as a lesbian and are just coming out.I'd think this website is a good place to start exploring possibilities. I empathize with the feeling of coming out and feeling like your love life is doomed because of geography. However, all you need is the one good person for you.Maybe going to meetups will help or just following some interests of yours will lead you to the right person. Good luck!

08-22-2015, 04:56 PM	#5
TruTexan Senior Member How Do You Identify?: lesbian butch Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Aug 2013 Location: in a one horse town in a large state, in the U.S. Posts: 3,952 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 6,112 Thanked 5,268 Times in 1,633 Posts Rep Power: 21474850	BUMPED....................... __________________

08-22-2015, 05:48 PM	#8
Shystonefem Member How Do You Identify?: Stone Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Shy for President Join Date: May 2014 Location: NH Posts: 1,105 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,475 Thanked 3,678 Times in 898 Posts Rep Power: 21474847	It isn't easy. Being femme makes it even harder. I feel that, if you are a femme, you have to be the one to start up the conversation. You have to let the person you are interested in actually get the idea that you are interested. I feel like butches have an easier time meeting people because they are not invisible (most often). I don't do that starting the conversation thing. Lol. I am really just too shy. __________________ Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them - that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like. ~Lao Tzu

12-09-2013, 06:22 PM	#3
ProfPacker Member How Do You Identify?: butch/MOC Preferred Pronoun?: Hy/hym/hys but in circumstances like work and some other places she Relationship Status: single Join Date: Sep 2013 Location: nj Posts: 1,365 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 7,023 Thanked 4,816 Times in 1,187 Posts Rep Power: 21474848	I feel the same way. I have tried online dating sites but the jury is still out. I think because I just want to date. I haven't been on the market for 34 years so in addition to the fact that I am older than many are looking for I have no idea how to flirt or start a conservation in a bar, etc. Always been a bit of a wallflower. I live in NJ and even though I have access to NYC it seems a little daunting

12-09-2013, 07:20 PM	#4
Bad_boi Member How Do You Identify?: Transman (male) Preferred Pronoun?: He, Him, His ect. Relationship Status: Handsome bastard. Tournaments Won: 1 Join Date: May 2010 Location: Seattle Posts: 727 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 122 Thanked 1,824 Times in 499 Posts Rep Power: 0	To me it seems online and bars are the best bet as far as the Evergreen state is concerned. If you are lucky you can end up meeting someone someplace random.

08-22-2015, 06:02 PM	#9
imperfect_cupcake Senior Member How Do You Identify?: feminine dolly dyke Preferred Pronoun?: Your Grace Relationship Status: I put my own care first Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: In a gauze of mystery Posts: 1,776 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,426 Thanked 9,727 Times in 1,613 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Okcupid and POF have quite a few in Spokane. I've even been contacted by a couple butches in Spokane (im in Canada) because the Butches I've talked to find it hard to figure out. Considering Spokane was listed in Autostradle as a total dyke city (from their survey response) kind of makes you despair that all the dykes are home, sitting on their couches wondering where each other is!!! Try meetups as well, it's a website/app that gets local groups of people together. And if you don't see what you want, start a group in meetups yourself. I'm going to as soon as school is finished and I have time to be a hostess to a group (show up at every meeting for the first year) I started one in Oxford and I had to leave just as it got underway