Paying It Forward

[Morgan]

I have looked through the threads, searching for a place to put something, which happened to socialjustice_fsu and myself this evening. I am a big believer in what goes around comes around....and feel that paying it forward is the only way to be. I know I can feel sorry for myself and wonder why all the negative shit happens in my life or give back and see what happens, it feels good to see someone smile, to see someone get something they need and to see a light in someone's eyes....

We met a young girl working in a restaurant, making $4 dollars an hour, raising 3 young boys alone, dead beat dad, and just barely surviving...the system sucks, corporate America sucks, keep them down, don't let them rise up....what is wrong, how can we be so f.....ing selfish. America home of the free, land of the brave......more like home of the greed, land of indentured. How can we expect these young people to overcome obstacles, they live in projects, they work at dead end jobs, they are not given the opportunity to raise above, so when we see an opportunity to help someone...we need to embrace it. Step outside of our comfort zone, find out what is going on, don't assume, ask questions, you may be surprised. People don't always want a hand out, maybe they just need a hand up......

After much discussion, SJ and I realized that the old and worn out laptop we were going to dispose of, which still had much use, could help her and her kids, get out of the situation she is in. Her desire to attend classes, the need to find a better job, a way of getting her out of the projects and into HUD housing, a small gesture, but a tool to afford her an opportunity out. So please remember it only takes a little to create something big....hopefully she will pass it on, and they will pass it on, etc, etc.....

[girl_dee]

Hi there, great thread...

We actually had a Pay It Forward thread on one of the other sites and it was a good one, so thank you!

I am making blankets and getting other items for the woman's shelter here in town. Also going to start donating to the Food Bank. It's a transition house for women who want a new start in life. They need EVERYthing.

I was given help when I needed it in my life so it's the least I can do in my own corner of the world.

[1QuirkyKiwi]

I do a lot of altruistic sewing and hand embroidery making blankets, soft toys and other items for the local Special Care Baby Unit, as well as donating these things to other charity raffles.

I donate my unwanted things to charity shops or homeless shelters….donate some of my free time to volunteering with disabled adults. I do sponsored swims and treks every couple of years for charity.

I’m another one who was helped by the kindness of others when I needed it most.

[Soft*Silver]

I am a firm believer in paying it forward.

this week i have an interview with a dog and cat rescue in my town, that needs helpers in their retail store. Since I cant foster now, I needed to find a way to help out for all the blessings I have been given for the care of my animals while I have been dirt poor. I know without the love and support of strangers and friends, I wouldnt have been able to keep my critters while I was dealing with all these health issues. When i was able, I fostered but now I cant because of my shoulder surgery. I need to just take care of my own right now, but I can help them by working in their store!

[ScandalAndy]

For the holidays I organized a group of people and we went caroling at a nursing home in downtown Philadelphia. The patients were mostly unable to leave their beds, and some of them asked to have their wheelchairs pushed into the hall so they could be closer to us.

I did a lot of traveling for New Year's, and as we were walking down the stairs to the tarmac to take a tiny plane, i noticed a lady struggling with her bag. I asked if she wanted a hand, and she gladly let me carry it down for her. When we got to the bottom she said "You know, when I was your age, I used to do that for people all the time". I said "Well thank you for allowing me to have my turn!"

[GPS]

We do alot of giving here in this small town, i had 9 boxes of toys, i gave to many families at christmas time, along with 19 bags of clothes. i find alot of stuff in storage units that i bid on. its the way i pay it forward..

[Sachita]

I honestly believe that each and every day you should wake up and make a conscious choice to be in service to humanity in some way. It can be as simple as a gesture or as huge as a financial donation.

Every week I buy bread and other food items from the Dollar Store and drop off at a food bank. Every single week without fail and have for a long time. I struggle with the whole food safety issue lately and decided I need to grow more but some places wont take fresh produce. I need to rethink this program.

I have my own server and build searchable blogs for people who like to start or try their hand at business or offer free healing services.

I donate food often to SPCA and or Humane Society.

I pay a girl to work for me but make it a conscious effort to sit down, talk and help her with things she needs to stay in college and inspire her to stay strong on a tough world.

I cook for my granddaughters mother/family shopping to provide safe meals, save her time and money. Her happiness is important to me at any expense. I have very little time but I make the time.

I work with families through social networking and individuality to help them cook, grow, buy, preserve healthy organic food for their family on a budget. When I help one it has a domino effect. I saw one of the ladies I work with start posting about food safety on her wall and very passionate about it. It made the hard work worth it.

I foster, adopt, so whatever I can for animals. This never stops. I can'r afford to board dogs free for military but I do offer a discount and evaluate each situation to determine who needs the help the most. So if I have 4 full pay boarders I can afford to take a dog at a very low discount because a mother of 2 had to leave her husband and until she gets on her feet. If I could afford to do it for free I would but I just can't.

I believe that blessings come to you because of the service you give. When I hear people say they don't have time or money but then I see them spending countless hours on facebook (or here) and they have plenty of money to buy 5.00 Starbucks, etc. I am sadden. I operate two businesses, a farm, all my animals, my family and that includes some child care. You make the time for things that are important. Doing your part IS important and if you engaged in a process of doing "something" every day you'll see the positive effects it has on your life. It just feels good and try to avoid the self righteous trap. Do and practice humility.

I'd like to see some ideas on how YOU can do this no matter your challenges.

If your disable how about going to the shelter pages to see which dogs are available and go onto craigslist and see who is looking for dogs and start matching them up.

If you have a car offer someone who doesnt a ride. When you go tot he store or run an errand ask them if they'd like to go or offer to pick something up for them.

Organize your friends and neighbors to give you their old blankets and pillows then take them to the animal shelters. See if they will add 5 bucks and take some big bags for food.

Do you like kids? Can you offer child care to a single mother who needs mommy time? Or offer to help her one or two days a week with housework or laundry?

any other ideas?

[Sachita]

Here's a great thing to do! This was at our local humane society and I'm sure many areas offer the same. This is easy for people to do:

Spay / Neuter Needs
We are seeking a volunteer to scan the classified ads in the newspaper as well as listen to radio shows advertising free puppies or kittens. A list of phone numbers will be maintained so shelter employees can call the owners and offer financial assistance for the spay surgery for the mother dogs and cats. What a wonderful way to help with the pet overpopulation crisis!

[LaneyDoll]

If you want a "Pay It Forward" idea, try this one...




Pink Elementary School has come up with a wonderful idea to help children less fortunate themselves. They have decided to make "Birthday Boxes" for children living at the women's shelters or in local foster homes. Frequently, these children get left out on important days like birthdays. The birthday boxes will be made out of shoe boxes, filled with such things as streamers, napkins, paper plates, decorations, balloons and gift cards for pizza and cake. Every child knows how much fun it is to have a birthday party and are very excited about the idea of creating a 'birthday party in a box' for others. In addition to the goodies inside the boxes, there will also be a note explaining the Pay it Forward idea and urging recipients to find some way of 'paying it forward', if not materially then with simple kindnesses to those around them. There's always a way to help others no matter what our own circumstances and the students at Pink School are finding this out. What a great idea!

[sylvie]

Love this thread!

i truly believe in paying it forward.. There have been SO many times in my life, that someone has done so for me, and really do all i can each day, no matter how big or small the gesture, to pay it forward ..

i am very passionate about helping women in poverty, because i've been there for years & years.. i am also very passionate about helping children, because as a family in poverty, it still tugs at my heartstrings looking back.. i get overwhelmed with guilt sometimes (& i'm working on that daily) - self forgiveness isn't always easy to find.. And so again, i am working on paying it forward..

Just today, i made some phonecalls ..
After losing weight, i've gathered many of my clothes (most still having tags on them even) and am donating them all to a place that opens it's doors to women in poverty a few times a week.. No charge for what they take.. That was one place i depended on myself and it's important for me to know that someone will benefit from these clothes, and NOT be charged for them ..

Also, i made a phonecall about volunteering at a Community Health Center for Women .. i have depended on this Center for so many things.. They have helped me have my utilities turned back on, they have put me through a self esteem course in 2008 (which really was the beginning of taking my life back), they have offered me so many services throughout the years when i wasn't working - and so now, i would like to pay it forward and help women who are where i once was - if i could offer hope or inspiration - or if i could simply be an ear to listen.. if i could DO something for someone that would help their situation, in any way or make their days easier..

Also, i will be getting involved in a program called the Food Purchasing Club.. It's a non profit organization that is to help members of the community stretch their food dollar by offering access to good quality vegetables and fruit.. Members simply pay 10 or 20 dollars, the money is all pooled together and then the fruit and vegetables are purchased for them direct from wholesalers or in bulk.. Volunteers help purchase, sort and deliver them to the families in need.. This does my heart good, really.. To know i could help with something like this which would ensure families have healthy foods.. i remember that being one of my major concerns for my children, living on the cheap processed foods each day and the lack of nutrition they might be getting..

Just a few of the things i'm working on this week..
Reading everyone's replies here makes me smile, SO inspiring.. We have a Planet full of wonderful souls.. ♥

[ScandalAndy]

tonight, as i was standing in the concession line at the movies, the older couple in front of me turned around and handed me their free popcorn voucher.



i settled for thanking them profusely, even though i really wanted to hug them. the only reason i got to go to the movies tonight is because my friend had free passes and invited me along.

[sierragirrl]

[B]funny i ran into this thread.i have just set it up with a friend of mine who is raising her grandaughter to purchase a bike for the granddaughter next month. She is at the age where girls start to be mean to other girls and has lost alot of her "friends".she suffers from low self esteem.her mother is a recovering drug addict and is raising another child but not this one.She really is a good seed and shoot a bike = excersize so thats a plus.
i will be dropping off the bike when she is not around,i want her to know there are people out there who love her. [B]

[Logicaly]

So when my sister was a junior in high school, it was her first week at a new school, she had just transferred there from another school she was having some issues at. She was let out of class a few minutes early and was driving home. She was doing the speed limit, obeying all traffic laws, had a green light, and this other high school kid ran out in front of her. She swerved to try and avoid hitting him while slamming on the breaks, instead of getting out of the way, the kid jumps on the hood of the car, crashes into the wind shield and then bounces off. She crashed into the center divide, and into the sign post. Sign post goes right through the front window the car, and literally missed stabbing right through her by inches. She of course was completely shook up. I was at home with my mom that day, my dad was at work with our only other car that was a good 45 minutes away. I had no way to get to my sister.

Two mothers who where there picking up their kids that day at that time, saw the accident happen. They immediately parked their cars and went over to my sister. One stayed with her and made sure she was okay, the other came and picked me up when she found out I had no way to get there. We had never met these women before in our lives and they could have easily done what everyone else does when they see an accident, slow down, look, and then keep driving. Instead they stopped and helped, they made it possible for me to get to my sister when she needed me the most.

Now I have to admit, before that day, I never really stopped at accidents, I was one of the people that slowed down, looked and then kept going. Now, I always make it a point to stop, the only time I don't is when I see that other people are already on the scene because there is no need to make it complicated. I always offer a bottle of water or just make sure they are alright. It is not much, but some times that is all that is needed.

[LaneyDoll]

Originally Posted by ScandalAndy

tonight, as i was standing in the concession line at the movies, the older couple in front of me turned around and handed me their free popcorn voucher.

i settled for thanking them profusely, even though i really wanted to hug them. the only reason i got to go to the movies tonight is because my friend had free passes and invited me along.

Originally Posted by sierragirrl

funny i ran into this thread.i have just set it up with a friend of mine who is raising her grandaughter to purchase a bike for the granddaughter next month. She is at the age where girls start to be mean to other girls and has lost alot of her "friends".she suffers from low self esteem.her mother is a recovering drug addict and is raising another child but not this one.She really is a good seed and shoot a bike = excersize so thats a plus.
i will be dropping off the bike when she is not around,i want her to know there are people out there who love her.

Things like this are paying it forward. Good deeds, often done without recognition and for random reasons. A lot of times, these deeds are small, do not involve a lot of money and benefit chance strangers. I am not saying that donating to charity etc is not paying it forward but the basic idea is to do things randomly, as the opportunity presents, for people you do not know or barely know.

From the internet:
~Steps
1. Be attentive wherever you are for opportunities to help someone. Perhaps you have an elderly or disabled neighbor who is too proud to ask for help with their yard work or maybe you're in a restaurant and see someone who looks like they could use some kind stranger to pay for their meal. You can change people's attitudes about the world through your unobtrusive acts of kindness.

2. Do something nice for someone you don't know (or don't know very well). It should be something significant, and not for a person from whom you expect a good deed -- or anything at all, for that matter -- in return.

3. Spread the word. If the person thanks you and wants to "repay" you (that is, pay it "back"), let them know that what you'd really like is for them to pay it "forward" -- you'd like them to do something nice for three people they don't know, and ask those three people to do something nice for three more people. The idea is to consciously increase the goodness of the world.4Pay it forward. When you notice that somebody has done something nice for you, make a note in your mind to practice three acts of kindness towards other people, as described in Step 3.

~Tips:
*The "pay it forward" concept was popularized with the book Pay It Forward by Catherine Ryan Hyde, which was later made into a movie with the same title.
*Even small acts, such as paying the bridge toll for the car behind you when you pay for your own, counts. If it makes the world a friendlier place, you succeeded!
*Practicing the "pay it forward" principle will make you alert to unexpected kindness from strangers toward you, and you may find yourself becoming more grateful for everyday kindness and consideration from people you don't even know.

[Tommi]

We are the world. We are the Children.

Love ya
Tommi.

[princessbelle]

What a WONDERFUL thread. You ALL are so inspiring.

There are opportunities everywhere. Really there are. As a nurse doing home health i try and watch for those. We aren't allowed to donate money or items to these families. But, what we ARE allowed to do is take the time to "hear them".

Sometimes it's as easy as that. People are lonely. Everyone wants to be heard and validated. Everyone has a story.

When you say in passing "hi, how are you today" and you get a look of sadness, maybe take the time to pat a shoulder in Wall-Mart or at the grocery store and see if they want to talk.

It can mean a world of difference to someone who is lonely and in need of friend to hear them, even if it's 5 minutes of our time.

Cost=nothing. Time=very little. Difference=could be huge.

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Originally Posted by ScandalAndy

tonight, as i was standing in the concession line at the movies, the older couple in front of me turned around and handed me their free popcorn voucher.



i settled for thanking them profusely, even though i really wanted to hug them. the only reason i got to go to the movies tonight is because my friend had free passes and invited me along.

When I lived in Scotland, Strathclyde Passenger Transport were hiking their travel prices up too often on the Underground Discovery tickets (an all day travel ticket on the Underground), those of us who had finished using the ticket would hand them over to people as they wee entering the station. There were times I was given the ticket….either way it saved a few pounds for everyone.

When I’ve bought myself a fresh juice or tea from a Coffee shop and I see someone who is counting the pennies of what they afford to buy, I’ll buy them a coffee or tea.

There is an elderly lady who comes to the Disabled Arts Studio….I asked my cousin to make her a loaf of bread when I go on the days I know she’ll be there. It makes her whole day and she doesn’t care that a bread maker made it, lol!

My Maori Grandmother/family taught us that these acts of Paying It Forward should be a part of everyone’s life naturally. When tourists visit the Marae food and tea/coffee is given as common place and for the time they visit, they are a part of the family.

I smile a lot at people....even though I get odd looks sometimes, lol!

[Tommi]

Originally Posted by LaneyDoll

Things like this are paying it forward. Good deeds, often done without recognition and for random reasons. A lot of times, these deeds are small, do not involve a lot of money and benefit chance strangers. I am not saying that donating to charity etc is not paying it forward but the basic idea is to do things randomly, as the opportunity presents, for people you do not know or barely know.

From the internet:
~Steps
1. Be attentive wherever you are for opportunities to help someone. Perhaps you have an elderly or disabled neighbor who is too proud to ask for help with their yard work or maybe you're in a restaurant and see someone who looks like they could use some kind stranger to pay for their meal. You can change people's attitudes about the world through your unobtrusive acts of kindness.

2. Do something nice for someone you don't know (or don't know very well). It should be something significant, and not for a person from whom you expect a good deed -- or anything at all, for that matter -- in return.

3. Spread the word. If the person thanks you and wants to "repay" you (that is, pay it "back"), let them know that what you'd really like is for them to pay it "forward" -- you'd like them to do something nice for three people they don't know, and ask those three people to do something nice for three more people. The idea is to consciously increase the goodness of the world.4Pay it forward. When you notice that somebody has done something nice for you, make a note in your mind to practice three acts of kindness towards other people, as described in Step 3.

~Tips:
*The "pay it forward" concept was popularized with the book Pay It Forward by Catherine Ryan Hyde, which was later made into a movie with the same title.
*Even small acts, such as paying the bridge toll for the car behind you when you pay for your own, counts. If it makes the world a friendlier place, you succeeded!
*Practicing the "pay it forward" principle will make you alert to unexpected kindness from strangers toward you, and you may find yourself becoming more grateful for everyday kindness and consideration from people you don't even know.

[Morgan]

[Vlasta]

What a great thread !!!!! Thank you

Working in the medical field all my life I never treated just a patient , but a whole family and I always made an extra step which doesn't cost you anything , but it comfort everyone involved in crisis . While I was still working ER before working in an anesthesia it was traumatic itself for the patient and family just to be in ER at many times with a life threatening conditions . Yes , it was extra work , but very satisfying to me .

I went to a grocery store and I heard " Nurse , nurse " I turned around and there was a person said you saved my life . Well , I didn't feel I saved someone's life on my own , but obviously I made that impression on the patient by my actions . This particular patient had a heart attack and want to leave and go home . I was always honest and stern . I told him and his wife . If you leave you will die . Harsh ? Yes , but truthful . Thank God he listened . It was so great to see him and his wife still together and happy . Many times when people approach me , I am embarrassed since I don't remember " you took care of my mom or dad " . I see so many people on daily bases it was very hard to remember everyone circumstances .

As for giving , I am all for it . I have means to do so and never hesitated to give . I believe in an another thread I stated , I donate and adopt a family or single mother in need .

This past holiday was a first time I didn't do anything since my own life was in turmoil , I felt guilty for not doing anything this year , but my situation was too demanding and I was too involved in it . We really didn't have the Christmas and call me crazy, but this coming Monday we will have a typical Czech Christmas dinner as a family . No tree , but family time since we couldn't do it during the holidays .

Yet , we as family combining two houses together I am not interested in craigslist , everything will be donated to people in need . The economy it's so bad , people are lacking a basic things , I am not interested to get any money for anything we no need . Actually it's a shame we have so many things when there are people they are having a hard time to put food on the table for they family.

I hope this makes some sense since I am writing this , because my pain woke me up and I needed to take my antibiotics . I will never forget people in need and when I can , I will always do something no matter what . I was raised that way by my parents my heroes , many posts I read here just wrench my heart .

I wish I could help more .

much love to all

Vlasta