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Old 04-05-2016, 06:47 AM   #20601
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10 Jokes for people who are well read or intellectually, deliciously tweaked.


1.What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

2. Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

3. I tried walking up a hill without a watch but had neither the time nor the inclination.

4. What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? I don't know and I don't care.

5. What do you get when you cross an octopus and a cow? A reprimand from the Scientific Integrity and Professional Ethics committee and immediate withdrawal of grant funding.

6. Your mom is so mean, she has no standard deviation.

7. A German asks for a martini. "Dry?" asks the bartender. "Nein," just one.

8. Pavlov is sitting at a bar, when all of a sudden the phone rings. Pavloc gasps, "I forgot to feed the dogs!"

9. How many Marxists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, the lightbulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.

10. I have kleptomania, but when it gets bad, I take something for it.


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Old 04-05-2016, 07:11 AM   #20602
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Old 04-06-2016, 12:56 AM   #20603
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Old 04-06-2016, 03:41 AM   #20604
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Just wanted to wish everyone a great month of April!!!!
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It is said, " Some lives are linked across time.....

Connected by an ancient calling that echoes through the ages "......
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Old 04-06-2016, 06:54 AM   #20605
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Congratulations to the U.S. women's hockey team!


United States beats Canada for gold at women's hockey worlds.

Alex Carpenter dashed Canada's hopes of reclaiming women's world hockey championship gold on home ice.

The daughter of former NHL player Bobby Carpenter scored the overtime winner for the United States in a 1-0 win over the host country Monday in Kamloops, B.C.

The U.S. went undefeated in the tournament en route to a third straight world title. Coached by former NHL defenceman Ken Klee, the Americans outscored their opponents 23-2 in the tournament.

Canada and the U.S. have met in every final of the 17 women's world championship. Canada won the first eight, but momentum has swung south of the border with their archrivals taking seven of the last nine.

... Russia downed Finland 1-0 in shootout for the bronze medal.

... Sweden finished fifth, the Czech Republic sixth and Olympic bronze medallist Switzerland seventh in the tournament. Japan was relegated to the 'B' world championships with Germany earning promotion to Plymouth.

The rivalry between the two countries brings attention to women's sports and women athletes, and is good for the quality of the play.

Now watch out for Canadian women in soccer at the Rio games.



Captain Meghan Duggan, since 2013

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Old 04-06-2016, 07:44 AM   #20606
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Old 04-06-2016, 08:48 AM   #20607
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Default lmaooo (I'm childish, I know) :)

Law School Renamed for Antonin Scalia Briefly Abbreviated "ASS Law"

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Old 04-06-2016, 02:45 PM   #20608
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Old 04-06-2016, 04:05 PM   #20609
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Old 04-06-2016, 06:11 PM   #20610
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Quote:
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This is so fantastic, I can't stand it!
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Old 04-06-2016, 07:12 PM   #20611
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Old 04-07-2016, 06:10 AM   #20612
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Old 04-07-2016, 07:24 AM   #20613
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Old 04-07-2016, 07:02 PM   #20614
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Old 04-07-2016, 07:59 PM   #20615
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Old 04-07-2016, 08:07 PM   #20616
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Old 04-08-2016, 07:08 AM   #20617
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Remembering my boy Marco. 1995-1997

He chose me when he was 7 weeks, the big lumbering goober jumped on top of all of his siblings to reach me.

Wanted him to be trained for personal protection, so off he went to boot camp at 4 months. They kept him for 6 weeks, I could visit to observe him but had to remain hidden as to not to be a distraction. That was difficult, but I got it.

They also had to train me on how to handle him. My goodness, he could do just about anything on command.

He grew to just shy of 125 lbs, yes a big boy.

So, we were ready to go on our work/adventures outside of the country. Marco made going through checkpoints with men in jackboots and automatic weapons, a breeze. They were too busy admiring Marco, they failed on more than one occasion to ask me for my papers.

He was just a year and a half when his behavior changed from a confident boy to a paranoid and jumpy boy. Noticed his hair was falling out in large clumps and he had a sore that refused to heal. The local vet took some blood and the results came a week later.

Marco had a very rare leukemia, it was going to be fast with no cure.

I could not breathe naturally the rest of the day, it was forced. He knew, he knew I knew. We were inseparable for a few days. I took him on all of his favorite places, and he ate all of his favorite foods.

The last walk was to the vet. His kind eyes told me he was going to be okay.

Thinking about you today Marco and every day.

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Old 04-08-2016, 07:14 AM   #20618
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Old 04-08-2016, 01:51 PM   #20619
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Old 04-08-2016, 04:12 PM   #20620
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