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Old 05-11-2010, 06:56 AM   #1
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Default Mustard on the CHEESE?: Idiosyncracies!

I was making lunch this morning and had a flash memory of something from way back when.

Back in my early 20's, I was dating someone who was just chock full of idiosyncracies and used to make me insane with her particular way of doing things.

I was busy making a sandwich for her one afternoon and she was hovering over me watching my every move. When I put the two pieces of bread down and spread a nice layer of mustard on one piece, she immediately stopped me and said, "Mayo has to be on the other piece - Mustard CAN NOT be on both pieces"

So I obliged and then got out some lunchmeat and laid a couple of pieces out. I then grabbed some sliced cheese and laid it out on the bread.

At that point, she SHRIEKED and proclaimed that she "COULD *NOT* EAT THAT SANDWICH BECAUSE I HAD PUT THE MUSTARD ON THE CHEESE!!!"

I remember whipping around at her and saying something like, "What the hell are you talking about???? It all goes in the same hole! Do you think your mouth knows the difference if whether the cheese was put on the mayo side or the mustard side??"

She insisted that it DID make a difference.

I later discovered at her Mother's house that her entire family were "No Mustard on the Cheese" people!!!

Anyway, I was making our sandwiches this morning and I couldnt help but bust out laughing about this. I know we all probably have certain ways that we like to do things, not just with food but with our everyday stuff.

Jack has a particular issue with the toilet being over the roll ("Like a waterfall" she says).

And I believe that ice cream must be eaten in a coffee cup.

What's yours?!
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Old 05-11-2010, 07:12 AM   #2
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Old 05-11-2010, 07:22 AM   #3
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i go further than no mustard on the cheese side... not on the mayo side either (total textural slick squick). i nestle the cheese between the meat. of course if there is a barrier of let's say lettuce on top of either condiment, then the cheese can go on top of that...




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Old 05-11-2010, 07:22 AM   #4
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em.. ahem.. mashed potatoes must be purist... and side dishes go in tiny bowls... *whistles and wanders off*
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Old 05-11-2010, 07:23 AM   #5
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Originally Posted by Jess View Post
em.. ahem.. mashed potatoes must be purist... and side dishes go in tiny bowls... *whistles and wanders off*

Are you one of those "my food can't touch" people?! *snicker*
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Old 05-11-2010, 07:31 AM   #6
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Are you one of those "my food can't touch" people?! *snicker*
Oh no, but I am so positive you will hear from someone who is very soon!
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Old 05-11-2010, 07:31 AM   #7
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Are you one of those "my food can't touch" people?! *snicker*
No. *I* am the no food touchy freak.

The ONLY arguement we have ever had was over mashed potatoes.

Here's the condensed version:

Me: Worst work day EVAH

Jess: Planning my fav comfy food - mashed taters and steak/gravy

Me: Get home, Jess says something about taters being ready to mash, but I like to use a mixer so Hy decided to let me do it.

I am digging around for the mixer and blades and turn around to see

Jess: "PLOP" A dollop of brown mustard sitting in my mashed taters

Me: :

Jess was lucky that Hy didnt wind up wearing those GD mustardy taters.

Mashed taters should be, at least in my world, made with unsalted butter, half&half and salt and pepper.

When Jess tells the story now there is something in there about me and my "drive by huffing" LMAO

I think its pretty great that in three years and all the change we have been through, to ONLY have fought over mashed potatoes is a neat thing.

But yes, I do have food touchy issues. And mustard should never ever touch the cheese.
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Old 05-11-2010, 07:33 AM   #8
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HA! I lived.. and learned .. nevah evah again!!!
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Old 05-11-2010, 07:41 AM   #9
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Yep, cheese goes with the dairy (mayo) and meat with the savory (mustard). The center of the onion slice is discarded and never used, eww. When having a salad in a bowl I make two cuts, turn the bowl a quarter, make two cuts, turn the bowl, etc until I've gone all the way around. I didn't even know I did it until the ex pointed it out. LOL
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Old 05-11-2010, 07:43 AM   #10
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Im beginning to think there has been a vast conspiracy to keep me from this whole "Mustard and Cheese Can't Touch" knowledge my entire life :P
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Old 05-11-2010, 07:45 AM   #11
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Im beginning to think there has been a vast conspiracy to keep me from this whole "Mustard and Cheese Can't Touch" knowledge my entire life :P

Me too, never heard of such a thing. I would say ketchup and mayo should go on different sides of the bun/ bread, only because when they mix together they slide and create a mega mess.
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Old 05-11-2010, 07:47 AM   #12
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Funny....on a plate none of my food can be mixed...the different foods can't even touch each other or I get icked out. BUT on a sandwich...I don't care....mustard can touch cheese, mayo can touch meat...whatever. Odd, never really thought about that before.
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Old 05-11-2010, 07:58 AM   #13
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Old 05-11-2010, 08:07 AM   #14
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Mustard most definitely ON the cheese - I in fact will chunk cheese and dip it into honey or hot mustard as a snack.

Food can not only touch on my plate, I often will make a mound of mashed taters and then spoon peas or corn or what have you veggies on top.

But ketchup must never be on the plate - it has to be in a side dish *g*
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Old 05-11-2010, 08:08 AM   #15
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when assembling a hamburger, my honey has to put the ketchup on top of the burger, NOT on the bun that wil then rest, on top of the burger. It MUST go on the meat. For me, condiments have an order, mayo, mustard, ketchup, do not vary from this.
I agree about the mashed potatos, but I have to warm the half and half, melt the butter into it, I dont use plain salt, Lawry's season salt is what I like, and dont be trying to sneak anything else in them. You can put what you want in them when they are on YOUR plate! don't even ask me about my fruit phobia!
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Old 05-11-2010, 08:18 AM   #16
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I don't want my food to touch.

Yes, please put that pasta in a separate bowl. Thanks. Oh, no, I'll help myself and make sure that the green beans don't touch the turkey.

Yes, I know it all winds up in the same place.

No, it doesn't matter that it does, because it is not yet in that place.


And I don't want anything with the same texture as onions or mushrooms anywhere near my plate, either, thank you kindly.

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Old 05-11-2010, 08:41 AM   #17
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Funny how things work, eh, Medusa?...

On my hot dogs, it's either sauerkraut OR chili, put both on and I wont even touch it, oh..and my weiners have to be Kosher Beef...i don't do that pork by-product oscar meyer stuff {yes, your bologna has a first name..and a 3rd, 4th, 5th etc}, don't care how broke we are...we're broke? fine, we shouldnt eat hot dogs anyways.
And where do people get off adding cheese and RAW onion to a hot dog???{if u order that stuff, u can hang up on kissing me for the day}

Beans can't go on my rice, let alone touch the plate, Sauce is ok, no Beans..especially kidney beans {to me they resemble cockroach eggs}

My ramen has to be al dente...It's a texture thing, if it's Soggy, I won't eat it...

My egg salad has to have cayenne pepper and horseradish mayo..
My tuna/chicken salad also...No onions !!! Not raw...

And yes, I've had a few clashes with some Dames I've dated, and one of 'em even said what you did Medusa, u sure we never dated??
She did point out a fact I still muse about...
"It goes down the same fuckin hole, u nitpicking bastard, if u barf it, the stuff's Mixed anyways, if u Poop it, you wont even know how to identify it"...


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Old 05-11-2010, 08:52 AM   #18
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Oh I forgot one of my biggest quirks-I have to come out even. I take a bite of each thing in my meal each time. So as I get to the end of the meal, if I see I am going to run out of something I will go get a spoon or two, whatever it takes to be even. It's such common knowledge that my son will offer me his veges if he sees I'm not even and we're out. LOL Of course I'm sure it has nothing to do with him not liking some veges. :-)
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Old 05-11-2010, 09:19 AM   #19
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The food not touching issue was a bit hard for me to wrap my head around. As a chef for close to 30 years, presentation and "building" a plate is first nature. It actually takes me work to NOT assemble a presentation but to serve things on separate platters/ bowls/ etc. to allow for her to place things the way she needs them.

I have a lot of my own delightful quirks. I am a laundry nazi. I have however learned to say thank you when someone helps out and just go off quietly somewhere and refold everything.. sick, ain't it?

I am also a neat freak and am pretty much constantly tidying things or vacuuming . I hate sweeping, as I think it just stirs up more dirt. So, I will come behind you after you sweep and vacuum. I can deal with a "lived in" clutter for a day ( maybe ) I like things in their place and will move them around if they aren't where they belong. This is mostly because if I can't find stuff when I need it and go ballistic. Plus, order is very calming for me.

With all of my quirks I am actually fairly easy to live with. We ( the wife and I ) work most of our lil issues out in fairly creative and amicable ways.

Her: " MY plate. Do what you want to yours. THIS is mine ( insert waving hand over her plate)

Me: Yes, dear.
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Old 05-11-2010, 09:47 AM   #20
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All sandwiches MUST be cut in half... diagonally... Just does not taste the same if it is cut straight across! Oh, and I don’t share from my plate. You can have some of my food, but, I will put some on another plate for you…

Yeah, I’m one of those people that won’t eat or drink anything in someone else’s house if it isn’t clean or has any bad smells…
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