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Old 05-03-2010, 07:45 AM   #61
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i am femme,,,
i am submissive,,,
but since my butch was super quiet, i was the one who will always fight for her, but she was very protective of me,,,
i guess we're different from the others because we both don't believe in toys, i mean, strap ons, vibrators, plastic cocks, dildos, etc...
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Old 05-03-2010, 07:58 AM   #62
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I actually do sometimes use Femme qualifiers because I am so excited to have Femme friends. I knew zero other Femmes before finding the Internets (heh) and it still makes me happy to be able to say "my Femme friend________". I think those of us who do not live in cities with millions of people and have less opportunity to see and meet other Femmes are maybe even a little star struck by other Femmes.
...

I love the transgressive feeling I get after work reading the newspaper while my big tattooed BullDyke G/F fixes dinner for me. It's HOT.
i love all of this! yes yes and yes!

i have said 'femme friend' because it's short-hand for 'she who gets a MAJOR part of my life without explanation, above all others' additionally, why not use the title (qualifier, if you must) for what it is, a title of respect?

<3
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Old 05-03-2010, 08:45 AM   #63
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i love all of this! yes yes and yes!

i have said 'femme friend' because it's short-hand for 'she who gets a MAJOR part of my life without explanation, above all others' additionally, why not use the title (qualifier, if you must) for what it is, a title of respect?

<3

So glad I am not the only one to proudly say...this is My Femme Friend!
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Old 05-03-2010, 05:15 PM   #64
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So glad I am not the only one to proudly say...this is My Femme Friend!
My fiesty fierce femme friend you ROCK
where is a cat woman icon pfft
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Old 05-03-2010, 06:21 PM   #65
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just droppin' in to ask:
is a "bad butch fairy"?
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Old 05-03-2010, 06:26 PM   #66
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just droppin' in to ask:
is a "bad butch fairy"?

So as an ally all you got out of the convos was this???
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Old 05-03-2010, 07:11 PM   #67
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So as an ally all you got out of the convos was this???
um, no. but it is the one question that continues to tickle my grey matter ... so far.
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Old 05-03-2010, 07:18 PM   #68
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um, no. but it is the one question that continues to tickle my grey matter ... so far.
This is the only Fairy Butch I know of

Is he bad?

I can't really say, rumor has it hy maybe a lil wicked...
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Old 05-03-2010, 08:39 PM   #69
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I do not always behave or even sit like a lady....

Do you?

Baby and wedding showers? Can't do it.

and you better remind me when your birthday is if you expect me to remember.
I think if I die and go to hell, it will be a baby shower that never ends.

This is a great thread - thanks for starting it.

I'm a femme whose ID has morphed a lot since I came out 4 and a half years ago. I guess I'm not a baby-femme anymore, but I understand now more than in the past that I am still discovering who I am and what I enjoy and/or will enjoy in the future. I suspect it may be my fate in life to continually be going through some sea change, and that's alright I guess.

I don't think of myself as fierce, but I'm glad there are fierce femmes here. I feel like a guy a lot of the time, but I live in the femme. Both elements seem to me to be my nature.

Lately I have decided that for me all lines that separate one thing from another need to be dotted, permeable. Like the walls of a cell, I guess.

Several of you in this thread have helped me understand myself better by sharing your lives and experiences and that means a great deal. So thanks.
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Old 05-05-2010, 03:45 PM   #70
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I think if I die and go to hell, it will be a baby shower that never ends.

This is a great thread - thanks for starting it.

I'm a femme whose ID has morphed a lot since I came out 4 and a half years ago. I guess I'm not a baby-femme anymore, but I understand now more than in the past that I am still discovering who I am and what I enjoy and/or will enjoy in the future. I suspect it may be my fate in life to continually be going through some sea change, and that's alright I guess.

I don't think of myself as fierce, but I'm glad there are fierce femmes here. I feel like a guy a lot of the time, but I live in the femme. Both elements seem to me to be my nature.

Lately I have decided that for me all lines that separate one thing from another need to be dotted, permeable. Like the walls of a cell, I guess.

Several of you in this thread have helped me understand myself better by sharing your lives and experiences and that means a great deal. So thanks.

I totally feel like a guy most of the time. Some can see it, some can't.

Those who do see it are most dear to me!

4 and 1/2 years? Man time flies! xoxooxox
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Old 05-11-2010, 07:22 AM   #71
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Apoc! Im with you on the whole baby-shower thing.

Jack and I had to attend one about a week ago for my little cousin and both of us were in excrutiating grossness with all the shower games and "ooh-ing" and "aah-ing".
No, I do NOT want to try to draw a baby on a paper plate with my eyes closed but I will oblige for the sake of my beloved cousin.

Im always really amused too at how other (mostly straight) women shriek in horror when I tell them I don't really like kids and never want to have any of my own. Sometimes I feel like I have just told them that my uterus is made of acid and Im not really human by their reactions.

On some level, I think its the whole expectation for some that woman=Mother=nurturer. Have a big fat bitch tell you that she hates kids and the little bubble of "Stepford Pussy" is popped rather easily.

Fantastic thread!
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Old 05-18-2011, 09:32 AM   #72
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So it's been a year and much has changed.

Still Femme

Still fierce

Discovering my Momi side. Learning to accept sweetness in my life and that gentle kisses and cuddling do not make me weak.

LOveee "Stepford Pussy"! lmaorof

Still hate baby showers

Sending out a big hello to all my Fierce Femme Sisters and Allies!
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Old 05-18-2011, 09:40 AM   #73
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Just wondering how different femmes here at BFP participate in creating more visibility for femmes at queer events like Pride, or if you've ever partaken in any kind of femme event of some sort.

Also, do you see an effort to create more visibility for femmes within the queer community where you live? How about at Pride events where you live? Is that something you actively try to create more of, and if so how do you go about it?
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Old 05-18-2011, 10:08 AM   #74
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When we were younger the Ohio femme population would place "Femme" stickers on our asses, we'd all walk around and clearly as diverse you could see we were a force to reckon with. As older femmes we now gather at one place and wear our femme pride without needing that sticker, once you meet a femme, well we are hard to forget. We attend events the younger crowds now put on and support and still have our phone tree.

Here in Florida I've yet to find Femme companions, which is kinda sad.

As a Femme ally, what do you Ender do to help keep our visibility out there?
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Old 05-18-2011, 10:25 AM   #75
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Just wondering how different femmes here at BFP participate in creating more visibility for femmes at queer events like Pride, or if you've ever partaken in any kind of femme event of some sort.

Also, do you see an effort to create more visibility for femmes within the queer community where you live? How about at Pride events where you live? Is that something you actively try to create more of, and if so how do you go about it?
Great questions.

The town I live in often has a Femme contingent in the Pride Parade.
I must admit I've not joined it, my lack of participation isn't out of apathy, but because I enjoy watching the whole parade. Also, I live in a town that has a very high % of queer families and is an ultra-liberal bubble. Its easy to take visibility/acceptance for granted here.

But that wasn't always the case. When I was younger Femme visibility was really important to me because I felt invisible to everyone (queer & heterosexual). I spent a lot of time empowering myself and my peers - to be out and loud and fierce.

But now I am older, self-confident and I am blessed to have some fabulous Femme friends who live right here and that I spend time with. So, I've not felt the need to join a specific Femme group.

I'm politically active, but I choose carefully which queer political battles I get involved in and I direct my energy and resources in those directions. Femme visibility, while important, is not a high priority politically *for me*.

All that said, I've seen a rise in the number of Femme visibility and coalition building groups in some of the nearby big cities like New York and Boston in recent years. And I think it is GREAT! especially for young or just coming out Femmes.
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Old 05-18-2011, 12:34 PM   #76
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Great posts!

To be honest, I have not gone to Pride the past few years or participated much in Queer events locally and that needs to change! I was in a relationship and my G/F was a home body and we just did not go.

But Ender your post really made me re-think....I do need to get involved in more Femme stuff and making ourselves more visible...htough it does seem with the younger Lesbians, being Femme or Lipstick is WAY more accepted than back in the 80's.

So I guess I need to look up when Pride is this year and go.
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Old 05-18-2011, 07:31 PM   #77
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Great posts!

To be honest, I have not gone to Pride the past few years or participated much in Queer events locally and that needs to change! I was in a relationship and my G/F was a home body and we just did not go.

But Ender your post really made me re-think....I do need to get involved in more Femme stuff and making ourselves more visible...htough it does seem with the younger Lesbians, being Femme or Lipstick is WAY more accepted than back in the 80's.

So I guess I need to look up when Pride is this year and go.
I think Christie is wanting to come down for Nash Pride. Last time it was on the riverfront and she came close to heat stroke.. ack.. Hoping they move it back to the park, much nicer/ roomy and more places to escape the heat! Hope to see you
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Old 05-19-2011, 06:50 AM   #78
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I really like the use of "fierce" and femme together! Just do.
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Old 05-24-2011, 11:06 AM   #79
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Originally Posted by apocalipstic View Post
Great posts!

To be honest, I have not gone to Pride the past few years or participated much in Queer events locally and that needs to change! I was in a relationship and my G/F was a home body and we just did not go.

But Ender your post really made me re-think....I do need to get involved in more Femme stuff and making ourselves more visible...htough it does seem with the younger Lesbians, being Femme or Lipstick is WAY more accepted than back in the 80's.

So I guess I need to look up when Pride is this year and go.
You betch'er glittery fierce femme self needs to go to Pride this year! We will be there, avoiding heat stroke, and honestly, I've not experienced much of being unaccepted - in fact, most of the "kinder queers" (younger crowd) I've known in Nashville actually love that I am comfortable embracing femme.
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Old 05-24-2011, 11:51 AM   #80
LaneyDoll
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How Do You Identify?:
Girly girl femme
Preferred Pronoun?:
She; Ma'am; Miss ;)
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Pitbull protected.
 

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Location: Birmingham, AL
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I tell everyone I am an enigma. So, if any of these sound stereotypical or offensive, I apologize-this is simply what I have encountered in my time...

I CAN take 3 hours to get ready BUT that is start to finish (shower, shave, shampoo etc etc etc).

However, if you tell me that I have 30 mins to get ready, I can-assuming I am already clean or can go with damp hair.

I am a disaster in the kitchen but can bake fairly well.

I know nothing about tools but can repair my costume jewelery when need be. AND, can make my own floggers (which would be in high demand if I would actually sell them.)

I cannot do anything to maintain my car and prefer to pay someone else to change the oil, detail it etc. I love to drive though and I love to drive fast!

I love to get dirty & sweaty when I work outside.

I do not bemoan a broken nail or a bad hair day.

I love to be waited on but do not expect it.

I will pay the check if you let me. I will always offer to, unless I tell you I am broke and cannot afford to go out and you offer to treat.

I do not maintain a manicure. I keep my nails short and neat but polish free. My toes ALWAYS have a pedicure-even in winter.

Do not dare to suggest I cannot do something I want to do. Just let me succeed or fail on my own.

Please do not ask me to be in a wedding-especially if you want me to be a server. If we are related, I will gladly help though. Do not ask me to host a shower. I will maybe attend, I WILL send a gift but I am not comfy chatting about most things discussed at those events.

Yes, I am approachable but am rarely approached. But, few people actually make the first move. I have had people tell me I am intimidating but I am really not.
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There are beauties who stop traffic and then there are beauties who grow obsessively in the hearts of the susceptible.
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