05-13-2014, 09:46 PM | #281 |
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"Doctor, I have a memory problem!" The doctor says, "When did it start?" "When did what start?"
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05-14-2014, 05:07 AM | #282 |
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Hair Pulling...... not just for preschoolers. |
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05-14-2014, 06:45 AM | #283 |
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05-14-2014, 04:44 PM | #284 |
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Velcro. What a ripoff.
A guy walks into a bar with a set of jumper cables…the bartender says, buddy, I’ll serve you as long as you don’t start anything. If someone hits you over the head with a coffee cup, have you been mugged? |
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05-14-2014, 05:15 PM | #285 |
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Hair Pulling...... not just for preschoolers. |
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05-15-2014, 05:19 AM | #286 |
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Hair Pulling...... not just for preschoolers. |
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05-15-2014, 05:46 AM | #287 |
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Why does a seagull fly over the sea? Cuz if it flew over the bay, if would be called a bagel. |
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05-15-2014, 05:13 PM | #288 |
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__________________
Hair Pulling...... not just for preschoolers. |
05-15-2014, 06:08 PM | #289 |
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Patient: "Doc, you have to help me. Some days I think I'm Mickey Mouse, some days I think I'm Donald Duck" Doctor: "How long have you had these Disney spells?"
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Be still when you have nothing to say; when genuine passion moves you, say what you've got to say, and say it hot. D. H. Lawrence |
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05-15-2014, 10:15 PM | #290 |
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What happened when the butch computer mouse met the femme computer mouse?
They clicked straight away. |
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05-16-2014, 02:50 AM | #291 |
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During a recent password audit, it was found that a blonde was using the following password:
MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofy When asked why such a big password, she said that it had to be at least 8 characters long A man in a pub asks for a beer. The barman says, "Sure, that'll be one dollar." "One dollar?" exclaims the man. Reading the menu, he says, "Could I have steak and chips?" "Certainly," says the barman, "that'll be two dollars." "Two dollars?" cries the man. "You're joking. Where's the guy who owns this place?" The barman says, "Upstairs, with my wife"." The man says, "What's he doing upstairs with your wife?" The barman says, "The same thing I'm doing to his business." Who lies better?? A woman didn't come home one night. The next morning she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew anything about it. A man didn't come home 1 night. The next morning he told his wife that he had slept over at a friends house. The wife called her husband's 10 best friends. 8 of them confirmed that he had slept over and 2 said he was still there.
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Faith is not belief without proof, but trust without reservation. It is said, " Some lives are linked across time..... Connected by an ancient calling that echoes through the ages "...... |
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05-16-2014, 05:17 AM | #292 |
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05-16-2014, 07:07 AM | #293 |
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05-16-2014, 06:01 PM | #294 |
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__________________
Hair Pulling...... not just for preschoolers. |
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05-16-2014, 06:07 PM | #295 |
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"Doctor, there is a man here who thinks he's invisible." The doctor says, "Tell him I can't see him!"
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Be still when you have nothing to say; when genuine passion moves you, say what you've got to say, and say it hot. D. H. Lawrence |
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05-16-2014, 06:13 PM | #296 |
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Typhoid! Tetanus! Measles!
I like to call the shots. |
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05-16-2014, 07:15 PM | #297 |
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05-17-2014, 08:44 AM | #298 |
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05-17-2014, 12:06 PM | #299 |
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__________________
Hair Pulling...... not just for preschoolers. |
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05-18-2014, 01:15 AM | #300 |
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"Doctor, I think I'm a deck of cards!" The doctor says, "Sit in the waiting room, I'll deal with you later."
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Be still when you have nothing to say; when genuine passion moves you, say what you've got to say, and say it hot. D. H. Lawrence |
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