My Dad

[DapperButch]

Hi, Folks.

I wasn't quite sure where to put this.

Last Thursday (3/25/10), I wrote on the "What made you sad today" thread about my Dad being diagnosed with Stage 3 Lung Cancer.

Unfortunately, by the next morning he was in ICU on a respirator.

Yesterday, we had to take him off of life support as the tumors were so large in his lungs that they could not get rid of the infection to even look at being able to treat the cancer.

It is amazing how one can go from being a very healthy person who exercised everyday, played golf nonstop (in the winter he played "freezing fridays" :-), and ate right, to having an increasingly bad cough for about 5 weeks, get a cancer diagnose, and then die within 8 days. How the heck does not happen?

The doctors were amazed by how aggressive the cancer was.

And he hadn't smoke in 24 years.

Anyway, I wanted to post an update as after that first post I received PMs and reps of support. Thank you all.

-A

[Linus]

Awww.. dude. Sorry to hear this. Your father, you and your family with be in my prayers.

[sweetfemme247]

I am very sorry to hear about that, My prayers are with you and your family.

[Semantics]

I'm sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family.

[Liam]

I am sorry for your loss, DapperButch. You and your family are in my thoughts.

[violaine]

dear dapperbutch,

my deepest condolences to you and your loved ones during this time of great loss.

belle

[adorable]

I'm so sorry for your loss. What a tragedy!! This actually happened to a friend of mine who had never smoked in his life! Cancer is ugly! What a complete shock this must have been for you!

[WILDCAT]

I'm so sorry to read this update and extremely sad and sudden turn of events with regards to your Dad...

I can't even imagine how you must be feeling right now.
__

Peace and love to your heart and your family - and may wonderful memories bring you ALL comfort in the days ahead...

Sincerely,
WILDCAT

:stillheart:

[Kimbo]

Dapper,

I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your father. Cancer is such an ugly thing and so incredibly unpredictable.

My condolence to you and your family.

Take care of yourself.

Kimbo

[BullDog]

I am very sorry to hear this Dapper. All my best wishes to you and your family.

[Jett]

Hey A... so sorry to hear this. I knew things were bad but I'm shocked to hear how fast things progressed... my heart goes out to you and your family big time my friend.

Peace,
Metro

[Bit]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Dapper and your family}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Losing a parent can be such a shock, the more so if he was always very healthy. Please try to take good care of yourself right now, okay?

[T D]

My condolences to you and your family, Dapper. I just went through a similar experience. We took my step dad of 49 years off of life support at 6pm on Monday 3/29 and he passed away in little over 6 and 1/2 hours, at 12:45am. I was just glad that it was fast, and he didn't appear to suffer at all during the process.

I know how fast ones health can decline, and I totally feel for you.

Be sure to take care of yourself through all of this!!!!

[DapperButch]

Thanks so much to everyone who has responded with support on this thread and through reps.

The toughest will be for my mom who has been with him since she was 15 years old. 52 years together and 45 years of marriage (she waited until he went through the Navy and college before marrying). They did everything together (except golf!), so this will be tough for her. Fortunately she is close to one of her neighbors and is connected to her church, as well, so that will be helpful.

My mom was the traditional homemaker who has never even paid a bill before, so there will be some new things that she will need to learn. I guess they figured that there was time for him to show her how he handled their finances because they were both so healthy.

I am glad that I live close by so I can help her with all of this stuff. She is a smart woman, so she should be ok. She is just scared since she went from living with her mother to marrying my father; she has never lived alone.

Thanks again, friends.

[DapperButch]

My condolences to you and your family, Dapper. I just went through a similar experience. We took my step dad of 49 years off of life support at 6pm on Monday 3/29 and he passed away in little over 6 and 1/2 hours, at 12:45am. I was just glad that it was fast, and he didn't appear to suffer at all during the process.

I know how fast ones health can decline, and I totally feel for you.

Be sure to take care of yourself through all of this!!!!



I am so very sorry for your recent loss, as well. I hope those 6.5 hours weren't too difficult. My father lasted only 28 minutes, and I found that to be a blessing.

[Corkey]

We are so sorry Dapper, our prayers go out to you and your Mom.

[Blade]

very sorry to hear this sad news. will be praying for you and your family

[Jet]

I'm really sorry Dapper.

[Odarlin]

My deepest condolances Dapper.
My heart goes out to you and your family.... your Mom.

[Andrew, Jr.]

Dapper,

I am so very sorry to learn of this news. I am lifting all of your family up in prayer. I am glad you are there for your Mom.

Love,
Andrew

[Oiler41]

I am so sorry to hear that things went this way for your dad, you and your family. Please know that you and your family are in my thoughts.

Glynn

[Diva]

Dear Dapper....

I'm holding You and Your family in my heart during this sad time. So very sorry to learn of this.


~Diva

[socialjustice_fsu]

Dear Dapper,
You and your family continue to be in my thoughts and prayers. This will be a hard adjustment for all of you. And, grief takes as long as it takes.
May you find some peace in good memories.
Love,
Tamara

[AtLast]

I'm so sorry, Dapper. My thoughts are with you and your family.

At

[Greyson]

Dapper my condolances. I will hold you, your mom and your family in my thoughts. I have never met you in real time but based on what I see in here and having some sense of "Dapper Butch" I would say your parents are good people, if you are any indication. Again, my condolances.

[Soon]

Thinking of you and your family during this difficult time and wishing you comfort throughout your sadness.

:candle:

[Enchantress]

I am so very sorry to hear of your loss. Words are inadequate at such a time, so I will simply say that you (and your family) are in my thoughts and prayers.

Sending warm, healing thoughts...

May you feel his love and spirit around you always.

S.

[Nina]

it's heartbreaking to read of your unexpected and life-changing loss...I can only add my wishes for a gathering of those you hold dear to help you and yours navigate these times...

please accept my condolences and all the best wishes for strength and grace...

Nina

[Gemme]

Dapper,

I am so very sorry to hear of your father's passing. You and your family will remain in my thoughts.

[UofMfan]

I am sorry for your loss Dapper. May you and your family find the strength and comfort you need to get you through this difficult time.

[Soft*Silver]

its so difficult to let go of a parent, especially in such a sudden unexpected way. There was no time to really grieve. When someone dies, we strive to make sense when really, no sense could be made of it. Death just is its own reason. So we humans, with out infinite ability to communicate and use language, are also limited by them. No words could possibly reach inside you and make that ache any less...grieving is such a solitary experience...you do it alone, even when you have family and friends and online communities to help you through it.

but, even tho we lack the ability to remove the ache, we stand beside you, if not in real life, then in spirity. I am so sorry for your loss and for the very hard decisions you needed to make. I will lift up the prayers tonight for you and your father and your family...

blessed be, my on line friend...

[always2late]

My condolences to you and your family for your loss.

[JakeTulane]

Dapper..

I know how you feel. I lost My Dad to cancer 3 years ago. I will keep you and your family in My thoughts and prayers during this difficult time.

Know that your Dad is resting peacefully now.

As Always,
Jake