Gender/ID breakdown

[Linus]

I don't know if I'll get all the variations (let me know if I missed something and I'll try to add it) but I'm curious as to the breakdown of gender/sex IDs. (pure curiosity sake). :)

If I missed something, let me know.

[Selenay]

Why do the only variations of 'queer' come with another stipulation? (Femme/queer, queer/butch, etc.)

I don't identify as queer femme but there is no way to identify as queer without the second implication.

[Linus]

That's why I said let me know if I missed any. I'll add queer by itself.

[BullDog]

I think of my gender as butch woman and lesbian as part of my sexuality. I could be covered under the just Butch category though.

[Linus]

I think of my gender as butch woman and lesbian as part of my sexuality. I could be covered under the just Butch category though.

Ok.

Do you think I should reverse the category to be butch/lesbian then?

I put butch as separate for those that do not lay claim to queer or lesbian but just butch.

[BullDog]

Ok.

Do you think I should reverse the category to be butch/lesbian then?

I put butch as separate for those that do not lay claim to queer or lesbian but just butch.

Well some people do think of lesbian as part of their identity. Not to criticize, it is just a bit curious that woman and man is not in any of the gender categories.

[WolfyOne]

I couldn't respond to your poll Linus because like Bull Dog, I consider myself a butch woman.

Can you clarify what just Butch is?
You have variations with the other ID's, just not that one.

[Linus]

Well some people do think of lesbian as part of their identity. Not to criticize, it is just a bit curious that woman and man is not in any of the gender categories.

I never thought to include them. I certainly can.

[Linus]

Well some people do think of lesbian as part of their identity. Not to criticize, it is just a bit curious that woman and man is not in any of the gender categories.

I couldn't respond to your poll Linus because like Bull Dog, I consider myself a butch woman.

Can you clarify what just Butch is?
You have variations with the other ID's, just not that one.

I've modified the Lesbian/Butch option to read Butch/Lesbian/Woman. Does that help?

[Sam]

male, no need to change anything. transguy is cool

[cinderella]

And what about 'stone'?

[Linus]

And what about 'stone'?


Does that help?

[JustJo]

Wow...just goes to show the incredible variety of ID's co-existing on this site... :)

I'm getting the feeling this is going to be a long list...and that's a good thing. :goodluck: Linus!!

Lesbian femme here :rrose:

[Linus]

Wow...just goes to show the incredible variety of ID's co-existing on this site... :)

I'm getting the feeling this is going to be a long list...and that's a good thing. :goodluck: Linus!!

Lesbian femme here :rrose:

I can only go as far as 20 options so.. :glasses:

[JustJo]

I can only go as far as 20 options so.. :glasses:

So how creative are you at combining categories? :cheesy:

[BullDog]

Hee, hee I am a stone butch too, lol. I think I need more than one vote! Good job Linus, but you might run outta room.

[Linus]

Hee, hee I am a stone butch too, lol. I think I need more than one vote! Good job Linus, but you might run outta room.

Just Stone Butch or Stone Butch Lesbian?

[Linus]

So how creative are you at combining categories? :cheesy:

I may have to but the problem is that if I combine them, it may cause some people to not respond because they don't ID as such.

[BullDog]

Well you might want to add Stone Butch. If I have one vote it would go to Butch Woman Lesbian. Some stone butches are lesbians, some aren't.

[daisygrrl]

<<<Queer Girl here :)

[Linus]

<<<Queer Girl here :)


Do you want a separate category to Queer then?

[UofMfan]

My ID is fluid, it evolves and changes with me, therefore I am cool with butch.

Thanks Linus for your patience. This is beginning to look like a Baskin Robbins.

[WolfyOne]

I think when you finally can't add anymore Linus, it'll be interesting to see how the results are going.
Good thing you have a category for other in case you do hit 20.

[daisygrrl]

Do you want a separate category to Queer then?

Either way is fine; I was just being specific since you asked :-)

[Linus]

Part of why I created this is to see how our community breaks down.

Additionally, I thought it would be good, as well, for everyone to see -- in hard, concrete numbers -- the diversity we have. Sometimes that visual can help us realize who everyone is that makes up "US" as BFP.

[JustJo]

Thanks Linus for your patience. This is beginning to look like a Baskin Robbins.

* looking around for the rocky road and peppermint stick two scoop option *

:giggle:

[Linus]

Either way is fine; I was just being specific since you asked :-)

Let me know. I'll create it. (would it be ok to put Queer/Girl with Woman in brackets?) :cheesy:

[daisygrrl]

Part of why I created this is to see how our community breaks down.

Additionally, I thought it would be good, as well, for everyone to see -- in hard, concrete numbers -- the diversity we have. Sometimes that visual can help us realize who everyone is that makes up "US" as BFP.

I think it's a real groovy idea, Linus!

[daisygrrl]

Let me know. I'll create it. (would it be ok to put Queer/Girl with Woman in brackets?) :cheesy:

Sounds excellent to me :bunchflowers:

I'm so looking forward to seeing the results!

[BullDog]

OK, once Linus lets me vote multiple times, I will vote for Butch and Stone Butch Lesbian too! :D

[Gayla]

Once you get to 19, just make 20 "Other" :)

I also just picked Butch because the rest..well, yeah..some are constant, some change but Butch is the most constant constant.

[Linus]

OK, once Linus lets me vote multiple times, I will vote for Butch and Stone Butch Lesbian too! :D

I can't do that, unfortunately. Once you choose whether it's single votes or multiples, it's set.

[BullDog]

Ya I know, just teasin. It's hard to choose sometimes, you know. But I am happy with my vote.

[Corkey]

Transgendered Male Id'd Butch Human, sorry it wasn't on your list.

[Melissa]

I clicked a button on the poll as lesbian/femme. But just as a general question to all, why do you think we need to ID as anything? What is the purpose of a gender ID?

Melissa

[JustBeingMe]

I am curious as to the results Linus. Good luck getting everyone to vote.

[Corkey]

Thanks Linus.

[Blade]

Transgendered Male Id'd butch, superman

[adorable]

Ugh! I picked queer and then Linus added a new one and now I want to change my answer!!!! LOL

In fact, I think Linus actually found one that fits me! FINALLY! I am so excited.

Thanks Linus!!

[MsMerrick]

There's a presumption that Queer and Lesbian, are not simultaneously possible..
and therefore, I am not voting :)

<---- Queer Lesbian Femme here...

[Stoney]

butch/lesbian/womon.....my vote...... ( and stone) but ya cant vote twice.....lol

all is covered for me!

[Lady Pamela]

I am proudly FEMME LESBIAN.

But I also do some things that some consider not within that range:

Such as camping on a rougher style, using tools, wrestling very rough etc.

So I guess at times I am considered to have a lil tom-boi in me..lol


I just think it is a playful..creative twist in me...smiles

[Galahad]

So, where is genderqueer? I was just getting used to it. Are we not using the term anymore? Gone the way of the dinosaurs? I forgot, third gendered is missing too.

[Linus]

So, where is genderqueer? I was just getting used to it. Are we not using the term anymore? Gone the way of the dinosaurs?


Added.

As I said, if I missed any please ask.

[Melissa]

I am proudly FEMME LESBIAN.

But I also do some things that some consider not within that range:

Such as camping on a rougher style, using tools, wrestling very rough etc.

So I guess at times I am considered to have a lil tom-boi in me..lol


I just think it is a playful..creative twist in me...smiles



Lady Pamela

I do not think gender ID determines likes and dislikes or actions. These types of limitations were used to justify why women couldn't vote or sit on juries or play sports just a few decades ago. It goes back to my earlier question of why do we even have gender IDs? What purpose do they serve both on a personal and a social level?

Melissa (a femme lesbian who loves to fish, buy power tools, is much more DIY handier than my butch, who doesn't paint her nails or wear make up or jewelry).

[AtLast]

So, where is genderqueer? I was just getting used to it. Are we not using the term anymore? Gone the way of the dinosaurs? I forgot, third gendered is missing too.

And other- gendered... but, the options do cover quite a bit.

Hummm.. how about non-gender-focused?

[Linus]

And other- gendered... but, the options do cover quite a bit.

Hummm.. how about non-gender-focused?


There is a category (now in the middle) that lists: Other/No ID.

[Melissa]

I've been thinking about this thread and tracing all the gender IDs I've had over the last 20 years. Here's my ID chain

Gay -> Lesbian -> Lesbian Femme -> stone femme...........


I've noticed that my ID seems to change along with Rufuboi's ID. I was just a plain ol lesbian femme when I met Rufusboi who ID'ed as a stone butch. What's a stone butch, I asked, when we first met. Rufusboi explained. What's a stone femme, I asked. Well, he thought it was a person who dated stone butches. So your now a stone femme, he said. Ok, cool.

Rufusboi is now transitioning and will be going on T. We talked about how he would ID. I asked him will you ID as male, a transman, a FTM. He decided he will ID as a transman. ok, cool.

So now I'm thinking I will change my ID again. Transfemme? Translesbian? Translesbianfemme? Translesbianstonefemme? gaylesbianstonetransfemme?

Oh how I wish for the days of just being gay!

Oh and let's not forget my neighbors think Rufusboi is my husband. It appears, we have just recently discovered, that we pass as a heterosexual couple. Who knew!!!! I'm leaving hetero out of the ID mix though, as its the one thing I've never envisioned myself.

Melissa [the hetero passing gaylesbianstonetransfemme]

[Linus]

I have added one more. That is it. I cannot add more at this point. I was trying to accommodate as many different IDs as possible but I cannot add more. At this point, if your ID is not listed above, if you can, please choose other and mention here what it is.

[Gayla]

I've been thinking about this thread and tracing all the gender IDs I've had over the last 20 years.



This is why I just went with butch. :)

My chain is probably just as long but it started with butch and has gone through a bunch of different other things that are butch-related. When I think through all the links in my chain, I think I even confuse myself with some it! All of them have been important and many are still valid today but I can't say they will be tomorrow. I can say, with 99.1% certainty, that the butch part still will be though, so I picked it!

[JustJo]

Hi Melissa :rrose:

No snarkiness here, but a genuine question...why do you see your ID changing simply because your partner's ID changes? To me, that feels like the old Mrs. xyz...when a woman's identity, status, etc. was determined by her husband's.

I see the need for gender/ID, a way to describe ourselves...for expediency if nothing else. And let's face it...it's one of the first questions we ask when someone has a baby right? Oooooo....did they have a boy or a girl? It's one of the earliest ways we learn to identify the people in our world. I totally get that not everyone's gender/identity matches their genitals. I am all for everyone identifying themselves any way they feel best represents them.

I guess it just feels weird to me to identify who you are in relation to someone else. Can you talk more about this?

For me, I'm a woman first...lesbian femme second. That's who I am regardless of who I'm with....or if I'm single...or if I'm celibate.

I'd love to hear more about if this change was spurred by any changes within you...or if the changing ID (based on your partner's) inspired any changes in you...if you're willing to share, of course!

I've been thinking about this thread and tracing all the gender IDs I've had over the last 20 years. Here's my ID chain

Gay -> Lesbian -> Lesbian Femme -> stone femme...........


I've noticed that my ID seems to change along with Rufuboi's ID. I was just a plain ol lesbian femme when I met Rufusboi who ID'ed as a stone butch. What's a stone butch, I asked, when we first met. Rufusboi explained. What's a stone femme, I asked. Well, he thought it was a person who dated stone butches. So your now a stone femme, he said. Ok, cool.

Rufusboi is now transitioning and will be going on T. We talked about how he would ID. I asked him will you ID as male, a transman, a FTM. He decided he will ID as a transman. ok, cool.

So now I'm thinking I will change my ID again. Transfemme? Translesbian? Translesbianfemme? Translesbianstonefemme? gaylesbianstonetransfemme?

Oh how I wish for the days of just being gay!

Oh and let's not forget my neighbors think Rufusboi is my husband. It appears, we have just recently discovered, that we pass as a heterosexual couple. Who knew!!!! I'm leaving hetero out of the ID mix though, as its the one thing I've never envisioned myself.

Melissa [the hetero passing gaylesbianstonetransfemme]

[Melissa]

Hi Melissa :rrose:

No snarkiness here, but a genuine question...why do you see your ID changing simply because your partner's ID changes? To me, that feels like the old Mrs. xyz...when a woman's identity, status, etc. was determined by her husband's.

I see the need for gender/ID, a way to describe ourselves...for expediency if nothing else. And let's face it...it's one of the first questions we ask when someone has a baby right? Oooooo....did they have a boy or a girl? It's one of the earliest ways we learn to identify the people in our world. I totally get that not everyone's gender/identity matches their genitals. I am all for everyone identifying themselves any way they feel best represents them.

I guess it just feels weird to me to identify who you are in relation to someone else. Can you talk more about this?

For me, I'm a woman first...lesbian femme second. That's who I am regardless of who I'm with....or if I'm single...or if I'm celibate.

I'd love to hear more about if this change was spurred by any changes within you...or if the changing ID (based on your partner's) inspired any changes in you...if you're willing to share, of course!

Justjo - A lot of what I said is tongue- in- cheek. I don't think any of these words/IDs can fully express who we are in terms of biology, gender and sexuality.

If I had to pick one, it would be lesbian. Nothing else. Even partnered to a transman I still think of myself as a lesbian. In fact, I laughingly said to Rufusboi, you will be a transman married to a lesbian.

I am really wondering why we have all these gender IDs and what purpose they serve for us as individuals or as a larger community? We seem to argue about them more than anything else and we do not have one way of defining any of them.

Rufusboi picked transman after a lot of thought about how T will change him physically, how he thinks of himself in terms of gender, and also how he defines the terms male and FTM. Other people on this site define transman, male, and FTM totally differently than he does. I actually think he could easily adopt any of these terms to represent who he will be on T. He does not, he has a more set way of viewing and defining these terms. So my post above is more about how really effective are these terms?

Melissa [the anti-stepford wife]

[Corkey]

[QUOTE=Melissa;119861]Justjo - A lot of what I said is tongue- in- cheek. I don't think any of these words/IDs can fully express who we are in terms of biology, gender and sexuality.

If I had to pick one, it would be lesbian. Nothing else. Even partnered to a transman I still think of myself as a lesbian. In fact, I laughingly said to Rufusboi, you will be a transman married to a lesbian.

I am really wondering why we have all these gender IDs and what purpose they serve for us as individuals or as a larger community? We seem to argue about them more than anything else and we do not have one way of defining any of them. So you would negate all other gender labels but transman and lesbian? I mean if you are happy in your ID, why not give everyone who isn't lesbian or transman their due. As long as you are happy right?

Rufusboi picked transman after a lot of thought about how T will change him physically, how he thinks of himself in terms of gender, and also how he defines the terms male and FTM. Other people on this site define transman, male, and FTM totally differently than he does. I actually think he could easily adopt any of these terms to represent who he will be on T. He does not, he has a more set way of viewing and defining these terms. So my post above is more about how really effective are these terms?

Melissa [the anti-stepford wife]

The reason we have all these gender labels is because this is how this community see themselves. Each and every one of them need to be honored.
Corkey, the one who will honor everyone's ID even if he blows a gaskit.

[Daryn]

I don't know if I'll get all the variations (let me know if I missed something and I'll try to add it) but I'm curious as to the breakdown of gender/sex IDs. (pure curiosity sake). :)

If I missed something, let me know.

OK... genderqueer guy (FTM does not fit for those of us not transitioning) .. I think genderqueer on its own probably goes more to third gender

And did I see androgynous in your list... just in case we have anyone...

[Daryn]

Transgendered Male Id'd Butch Human, sorry it wasn't on your list.

I mostly like it but since I have an inner gay boy that gets expressed (except for who I partner with) I'd leave Butch out of that ID. But that's me.

[Melissa]

[QUOTE=Melissa;119861]Justjo - A lot of what I said is tongue- in- cheek. I don't think any of these words/IDs can fully express who we are in terms of biology, gender and sexuality.

If I had to pick one, it would be lesbian. Nothing else. Even partnered to a transman I still think of myself as a lesbian. In fact, I laughingly said to Rufusboi, you will be a transman married to a lesbian.

I am really wondering why we have all these gender IDs and what purpose they serve for us as individuals or as a larger community? We seem to argue about them more than anything else and we do not have one way of defining any of them. So you would negate all other gender labels but transman and lesbian? I mean if you are happy in your ID, why not give everyone who isn't lesbian or transman their due. As long as you are happy right?

Rufusboi picked transman after a lot of thought about how T will change him physically, how he thinks of himself in terms of gender, and also how he defines the terms male and FTM. Other people on this site define transman, male, and FTM totally differently than he does. I actually think he could easily adopt any of these terms to represent who he will be on T. He does not, he has a more set way of viewing and defining these terms. So my post above is more about how really effective are these terms?

Melissa [the anti-stepford wife]

The reason we have all these gender labels is because this is how this community see themselves. Each and every one of them need to be honored.
Corkey, the one who will honor everyone's ID even if he blows a gaskit.



Corkey - I do not negate any IDs. Lesbian and transman are just two of many gender IDs. They do not warrant any more due than any other ID. To me, all Ids are equal. I think you misunderstood my post. It is very hard to communicate ideas and tone online.

Thanks for answering my question about why you think we have gender IDs.

Melissa

[Corkey]

[quote=Corkey;119877]



Corkey - I do not negate any IDs. Lesbian and transman are just two of many gender IDs. They do not warrant any more due than any other ID. To me, all Ids are equal. I think you misunderstood my post. It is very hard to communicate ideas and tone online.

Thanks for answering my question about why you think we have gender IDs.

Melissa

You're welcome, and yes trying to convey gender labels often gets muddled.

ETA: No one asked for more, due just equal due.

[Galahad]

I clicked genderqueer. I really have a hard time with all the labels, nothing fits exactly. I like what someone here said once, about being liminal, I feel like I'm in a hallway with my foot and hands pushing against as many doors at once as I can manage. Multi thresholds. Liminal queer is a better word for me than genderqueer.

[Nat]

so i'm a bigender genderqueer queer lesbian femme woman.

I don't see queer and lesbian as fighting each other - I claim both.

though I consider bigender, genderqueer, femme and woman to all be gender IDs, I also don't feel like they conflict and I claim them all.

I'm going to choose bigender on this thing because nobody else has, and it's possible I'm the only one here (?). However, the full shabang is up there in lavender. :)

[Nat]

I clicked genderqueer. I really have a hard time with all the labels, nothing fits exactly. I like what someone here said once, about being liminal, I feel like I'm in a hallway with my foot and hands pushing against as many doors at once as I can manage. Multi thresholds. Liminal queer is a better word for me than genderqueer.


liminal is such a lovely word.

[Lynn]

I just ID as lesbian. Didn't vote because "other" just didn't communicate it well enough. I don't ID as "femme" although I am feminine. I consider this an attribute, not an identity.

[Lynn]

I just ID as lesbian. Didn't vote because "other" just didn't communicate it well enough. I don't ID as "femme" although I am feminine. I consider this an attribute, not an identity.

I mean to say that I consider this an attribute for myself, not *my* identity. Just to clarify.

[WolfyOne]

I just love, love, love the DIVERSITY we have here.



Did I say how much I really, really, really love it :)

[Gemme]

I don't know if I'll get all the variations (let me know if I missed something and I'll try to add it) but I'm curious as to the breakdown of gender/sex IDs. (pure curiosity sake). :)

If I missed something, let me know.

I think you've done a really good job including as many of us as possible. I had 2 options to choose from...Stone Femme Queer and Queer Girl (Woman) since I id as a Queer Stone Femme Girl. I chose SFQ because the Stone comes before the Girl for me though both are important, integral parts of my self.

[Bard]

I am a Stone Butch female ID as I was once told a study in contrast yes the masculine side and traits kind of is stronger then the fem side but still I am both. It has only been in the last couple of years I have come to be comfortable with who and what I am strong and secure. for far to long I tried to conform. What I love about this place is that we are all diffrent and unique is our own way and celebrated for that ... so to thine own self be true for you are wonderful just as you are all the flavors of the rainbow brothers and sisters all.. :fastdraq:

[Mister Bent]

<snip> But just as a general question to all, why do you think we need to ID as anything? What is the purpose of a gender ID?

Melissa

Saves having to lift the tail and take a peek.

- Bent, beast of liminal proportions

[little man]

Saves having to lift the tail and take a peek.

- Bent, beast of liminal proportions

understated, as always.

[waxnrope]

I didn't vote. I don't know who I am today! Well, not femme. But that leaves too much space. Glad to know that some others here are not fixed in one place.
One friend captured my travels with id well: Stone Daddy McFaggy Butch? :rofl:

[chefhottie25]

I identify as a boi. I didn't see that among the options.

[DapperButch]

I identify as a boi. I didn't see that among the options.


Queer boy/boi (man) is up there. If the man part doesn't fit, maybe you could get Linus to change it since no one else has yet signed up and because taking the "man" part out would make it more of a general category that more may fit into?

[BornBronson]

How about Macho feminist butch straight woman?.
Hey,I just found out that works for me.


Moving on now :byebye:

[Daywalker]

Gender Neutral.


And apparently Invisible to the Community list.

:|

Good thing I see one of mah 'Sprinkles' listed:
:vigil:

Gender Neutral, Hookah Smokin', Slow Shufflin, Prophetic Ramblin', Koolaid Lovin'...Butch Hippy.

:vampirebat:

:koolaid:

:daywalker:

[Linus]

Day, it's not invisibility but rather a limit to the number of options in the polls I can put up.

[Daywalker]

Day, it's not invisibility but rather a limit to the number of options in the polls I can put up.

Duly noted.
:playingchess:

I would have clicked 'other'...but then I would have othered myself.
:huhlaugh:



:fan:
:daywalker:

[Arwen]

Queer femme and thanks for doing this.

[Massive]

I had to pick "Other/No ID" cos I am GenderQueer, Butch and a Dyke!
(amongst many other things)

[Jett]

I'm not listed up there, but that's ok. I could click "other" but not "no ID", maybe I'll just leave it.

Interesting thread.... great diversity.
Metro

[Ben]

too frigging funny.. I can't quit laffing.. how about justa guy who has a love affair with John Deere Tractors?

[Darth Denkay]

My experience exactly. I started out identifying as butch, then went through a whole series of additional identity tags (butch was always there) and now I'm back identifying as butch.

This is why I just went with butch. :)

My chain is probably just as long but it started with butch and has gone through a bunch of different other things that are butch-related. When I think through all the links in my chain, I think I even confuse myself with some it! All of them have been important and many are still valid today but I can't say they will be tomorrow. I can say, with 99.1% certainty, that the butch part still will be though, so I picked it!

[Rockinonahigh]

I could have clicked several things but I dont need to.Im jus little old me,dont need labels or tags..im a butch and there is no way anyone can miss it.Besides all the labes and tags are confuseing..whay cant we all just be without it all?

[EnderD_503]

Butch (male-ID), Transgendered Male Id'd Butch Human and Transgender Stone Butch hit closest for me. The most representative of what I consider to be my gender are male, stone and butch. In certain respects I might be considered transgendered, in other respects it doesn't in that I feel it doesn't accurately represent my own self-perception as male.

[Gryph]

As to the poll, I don't see Two-Spirit there and so I'm sorry, I can't answer your poll.

[Bit]

LOL! Poor Linus! There's no way to get every option in there--but the attempt was valiant! :bowdown:

I clicked Stone Femme Queer--it came the closest. I agree with Gemme, Queer girl would have fit too, but Stone Femme Queer was closer.

[Rocket]

I don't identify with the term "woman." So the "Butch-Lesbian-Woman" doesn't work for me.
I'd rather see "Queer-Butch-Lesbian-Female."

[Ms Vixen]

..ultra high femme, as a category? There are so many "flavours" to femme....

[Dean Thoreau]

Sorry I identify as..human.....
to many labels will make my world to tiny..... :wine:

[canmarielan]

There are many things to learn from this thread and others like it.

I suppose one thing we can absorb here is that identification is as fluid and varied as the tips of fingers. I respect and appreciate the attempt to collect this information pertaining to identity as I believe knowledge is powerful. Instead of looking for every shred of exclusivity, perhaps looking and realizing how amazingly diverse our community is is the key. In reality, it would be impossible to conceive every personal id just as one couldn't discern every fingerprint possibility.

I find joy in the knowledge that I am loved and respected here even if my "id label" wasn't an option on a poll whose list of options is a mile long.

[Lady_Wu]

I>>>>Queer PolyAndrous Masochist Semi-Stone Bookish Geek Gait/Vision-Impaired Femme-Of-A-Certain-Age EXTRAORDINAIRE!
Lady_Wu