Relationships - What things do you want & need?

[Rogue]

What things do you need to make a relationship last? What things do you look for in a potential partner and why? What things will you NOT tolerate from a relationship?

For me.. relationships are alot of work.. and it takes 2 devoted people to work at it.. relationships are NOT one sided.. there is always 2 sides.. always 2 people (in most cases) *gryn and always twice the amount of work.. working toward life goals and decisions..

To make a relationship last I would require the following things..

* friendship
* open communication - keeps the relationship alive - ask for what you want and need from each other
* loyalty & trust - without this you don't have anything
* hard work and dedication - can lead to a lifetime of happiness
* faith - in the both of us that we are in this together for the long haul

I look for these things in a potential partner..

* friendship
* Love - because it is not just about the good times - love endures all
* Respect - because without it there can only be hurt and pain
* Honesty - because without that you don't have trust
* Trust - because you will make life decisions together or for each other and you have to trust in those decisions
* Monogamy - because I don't like to share emotionally
* Morals, Values & Integrity - because it shows true strength of character

I will NOT tolerate the following from a partner or a relationship..

* Dishonesty - because it hinders trust and you need that to succeed
* Cheating - because it hurts the soul and kills the love
* Disrespect - because it makes you feel belittled and used
* Abuse - in any form, be it, mental, physical, emotional etc. Because it is WRONG - and makes you feel unimportant and harms your sence of self worth

These are my thoughts and perceptions on potential partners and relationships.. I would like to hear your thoughts as well in case I have something new to learn or something new to add to my list..

I posted this some time ago on another site.. but thought it would do well here so I brought it over!

*hugs*
Rogue

[NotAnAverageGuy]

I will bite *nom nom*

friendship
honesty
trust
willing to look past my nasty faults
ability to help me take care of my animals with no complaints
and NO NO NO DRAMA

thats all I want

[evolveme]

1. I am only willing to tolerate bed hoggery so much. Then you gotta get your own sleeping arrangements.

2. Must be willing and happy to sleep in a cool environment. Not up for negotiation.

3. NOT a smacker.

4. Chatty behavior is generally frowned upon. Get to the point. Please and thank you.

5. Pick up your :sock:s.

6. Liberal politics a must.

7. You can be my Daddy but don't call me corny names.

8. It's alright to ask for what you need. In fact, it's mandatory.

Not a mind reader,

e

[Gemme]

My list of demands:

You must be a furnace in the winter and sleep on the other side of the bed in summer.

You must indulge my whims, no matter the origin.

You must tolerate a maximum of 2 minutes of whining before you gently remind me that I am, indeed, whining.

You must mind your manners, in all forms.

You must obey the laws of physics.

You must practice good hygiene regularly.

You must have a smartass sense of humor, otherwise I will eat you alive.

You must forgive me my sins, especially since you will be partaking in most of them.

You must not control me or try to fit me in a preconceived mold or some image of girlfriend past. I am me. Love me or leave me.

You must know yourself and speak your mind when necessary.

You must love the arts. Music, movies, dance, theatre, art, museums....I love them all. Oh, and the circus. You must love the circus.

You must be kind, because I am not. You must be gentle, for I've forgotten how. You must be patient, as I've never been. You must be calm, since I cannot be. You must be the up to my down and in to my out.

[evolveme]

Gemme,

Why is it necessary that they obey the laws of physics?

I mean, gravity I understand, but if inertia could somehow be avoided in an auto accident, I really think you should reconsider.

With you on the smartassitude. Don't want to have eat nobody alive.

e

[Gemme]

Gemme,

Why is it necessary that they obey the laws of physics?

I mean, gravity I understand, but if inertia could somehow be avoided in an auto accident, I really think you should reconsider.

With you on the smartassitude. Don't want to have eat nobody alive.

e

I was thinking more along the lines of each action having an equal but opposite reaction but yes, auto accidents are something to consider.

:deepthoughts:

If he could bend the laws of physics, how would I keep up with him? I stand by my previous statement, but allow for selfish reasoning.

Edit to previous list:

You must own lots of :duct: so that you can tape yourself into your seat in case of an auto accident.

[evolveme]

I was thinking more along the lines of each action having an equal but opposite reaction but yes, auto accidents are something to consider.

:deepthoughts:

If he could bend the laws of physics, how would I keep up with him? I stand by my previous statement, but allow for selfish reasoning.

Edit to previous list:

You must own lots of :duct: so that you can tape yourself into your seat in case of an auto accident.

Well, I see that I have been outwitted here.

I think I shall put a request into The Cosmic Waitress, however, that *I* be permitted to bend the laws of physics some time or another.

:duct: may do more harm than good,

e

[John Shaft]

Edit to previous list:

You must own lots of :duct: so that you can tape yourself into your seat in case of an auto accident.

Your duct tape looked like toilet paper. Just sayin......

[blush]

I need someone who can make some kickin' French toast.

[Gemme]

Well, I see that I have been outwitted here.

I think I shall put a request into The Cosmic Waitress, however, that *I* be permitted to bend the laws of physics some time or another.

:duct: may do more harm than good,

e

Outwitted? Nah. I'm just lazier than you.



Your duct tape looked like toilet paper. Just sayin......

I suppose, but I've never wiped my tush with gray toilet paper before, so I wouldn't have thought that.

[evolveme]

I need someone who can make some kickin' French toast.

Oooo, that is a plus.

Cook. You must be able to cook.

EZ would have thought this -->:sock: looked like toilet paper. (He wears thick glasses for a reason.)

e

[MrSunshine]

:sock: <-------thought that was an ass :sock:

[Hudson]

:sock: <-------thought that was an ass :sock:


thought it was a blue dolphin

[Mister Bent]

<snip>

Cook. You must be able to cook.

e

Phew.

Just made it under the wire.

*smack smack*

[blush]

Cook. You must be able to cook.

e

Right? I'll put up with all kinds of tomfoolery if they can do more than boil water.

[blush]

:sock: I thought it was a boomerang.

[MizzSabra]

I wrote this letter to the Universe on Aug 10th.....Sept 9th I met mi amore. I wasn't going to settle again.

:love1:

I want someone emotionally available, semi-sane, communicative (without over processing), some form of income (don't have to be rich, but able to pay own bills), plays hard, works hard and still can chill in the house or yard for the day. Not a heavy drinker or addicted. If you are in recovery, awesome, but please be in recovery for a minimum of 5 years. I'm not a heavy drinker (less than once a month), I do smoke pot (mostly for body pain and insomnia) and cigarettes (I am a polite smoker).

I don't necessarily want to live together, space is good. I want someone who I can talk to when I've had a great day or a shitty day and won't be "bothered" with all that. I want someone to share my life with and visa-versa. I want to love and be loved. I don't need another child, I already raised mine, so if you are looking for a Mommy, it's not me. Someone who can appreciate all my Virgo quirks. Someone who can appreciate all (or at least some) my different sides. Someone who loves the outdoors as much as I do (or somewhere close to how much I love the outdoors). Someone who loves animals, but not too much. I'm at my dyke limit of animals right now. ;) Someone who isn't going to be intimidated by my large collection of power tools. Someone who isn't intimidated by my strength or my weaknesses. Someone who can show emotion. Someone who is kinky or semi-kinky. Someone who can take me in their arms and tell me that they love me. Someone who isn't intimidated by my height and the fact that I love to wear 3 inch heels when I got out. Someone who isn't intimidated by my butch/ftm friends/Unkles. Someone who isn't intimidated by my gayboy friends. Someone who wants to get their hands dirty in the garden with me (or at least pretend you like to get your hands dirty) and appreciate the fruits of our labor. Someone not already in a relationship!

This person is butch or FTM and a top. Switchy is ok too, but not all the time. ;)

Are you this person or do you know someone like this and can handle a 6' tall blonde amazon?

[evolveme]

:sock: I thought it was a boomerang.

Whatever it is, it is SO freakin' cute!

[evolveme]

Right? I'll put up with all kinds of tomfoolery if they can do more than boil water.

No joke, sister.

I may even reconsider how much chit-chatting I will allow.

Maybe.


:chef:s do it best,

e

[MizzSabra]

<snippitysnip>

:chef:s do it best,

e

Yes we do.

:rubberducky: Whoot! Rubber duckie for me! :D

[evolveme]

Yes we do.

:rubberducky: Whoot! Rubber duckie for me! :D

I know I said it privately, but I wanted to say here to:

I love your love story.

:rose:

[JustLovelyJenn]

You know, this list has changed a lot lately... I finally figured out how much I like being myself. How much I can do all on my own without anyone beside me. When I gained that self confidence... a lot of my desires about the people I involve in my life changed.

NOW...

I want someone who loves me unconditionally for exactly who I am.

Someone who is willing to support me in my endeavors and is willing to be supported in theirs.

Of course the love of my children is a must.

But also the love of children in general. In particular, a willingness to be involved in the lives of teenagers, since I intend to be a High School Choir teacher by the time I get where I'm going.

I want to be able to share moments of difference. Coming together to learn the things the other can teach. Its become more important to me that we are different then the same. There is always common ground if there is love in your heart. But I need someone who loves themselves and is passionate about their life, and lets me be the same way about mine.

I guess, most importantly... I need that tingling feeling, to quote one of my favorite movies (brownie points if you get this) I want the "foot poppin' kiss".

[Mister Bent]

No joke, sister.

I may even reconsider how much chit-chatting I will allow.

Maybe.


:chef:s do it best,

e

Keep talking like that and I'll show you what's under my :sock:

[Gemme]

Whatever it is, it is SO freakin' cute!

It's. A. Sock.

:sock: <----sock

:freak:

[Dragonfly]

In order of priority I NEED relationship-wise:

Time to really think about this list and come back to edit when I am actually ready to be looking for someone

Honesty~ not kidding I need like 98% or more sincerity even if negative

COMPASSIONATE~ I dont like meanies to anyone anywhere

Love Animals and Kids~ but not too much or in a gross way

Sense of Humor~ cause I am a nerdy dork

Emotionally balanced~ and in tune/ harmony w them

Romantic~ showing how well you know me occasionally not often

Sexually open mouthed~ as in wanting to talk about it not just willing

Conversational~ Starts up a convo with me about something, anything, they are interested in talking about


**Read to me and genuinely like music and art... they are a bonus that gets me to give out bonuses!



*** Everything else would fall into place cause I like to compromise, it makes me feel successful.

[T4Texas]

I would want someone who is honest and who can appreciate my brand of honesty which includes telling you things you may not want to hear. I feel if you are both on the same page, you should be able to do that without one or the other feeling offended. Loyalty is also high on the list. When I partner with someone, they are it, there is no other person or reasons for me to stray. If you feel the need to do those things, then finish up your business first and then you can feel free to play. *note this applies to monagamous relationships and I do realize there are many folks who prefer other types of relationships so thats up to them to decide what rules apply to them. Trust is paramount, because if you have no trust you basically have nothing.
Now with all the big important things said, I also would like someone who can cook at least a little bit. (having lived with someone before who couldn't and finding it was a royal pain, this altered my ideas about domesticity.) I also need someone who can have an intelligent conversation. You don't have to be Einstein, but I can converse on a wide range of subjects and like someone similar. My partner of choice is femme. There are no exceptions to that and she also has to be someone who can accept and appreciate my perversions. Last but not least, I have always had two rules of thumb for dating. You must have a job and a place to live. I know that might seem a bit much as not all people can meet that criteria, but to me it shows some attempt at being responsible if you can achieve those things. Its a short list and I believe you can work around most things that come up and find a happy medium most of the time if you care enough for the person. We all have to remember that relationships are a lot of work and both parties have to do the work, not just one.

[Random]

For me?


Honesty.. Blunt, Painful, No holding back for any reason... No half truths to save my feelings, or make you look better... Honestly, it's a reflex.. You lie to me or omit part of the truth, and part of my heart starts slamming doors..

In this.. I am the least judgmental person you will ever meet.. Did time? fine, sold drugs? ok, Was a junkie? Me TOO!! Walked the stroll? Ran a stable? Did you enjoy it or was it something to survive..

The only thing that's going to get the door completly slammed is a liking for 12 yr old girls/boys and a thrill when kicking puppies...

Confident in who you are... There is a strength that comes from knowing who you are and liking yourself.. Something that the world can't touch.. I find that someone who has this belive in themself doesn't feel like my reactions have anything to do with them.. lol.. until I tell them.. I like that.. a lot..

Has to be a communicater... I'm a gemini.. I really do want to hear about your crappy day, how you watched a dragonfly for 20 mins... why you liked that movie or book...why you feel the way you do... Honestly.. with me.. there is no such thing as over processing.. Well, until it starts going in a circle and is non productive.. but don't worry.. I will tell you when that starts happening...

Trust... Even when you know you are going to get hurt.. that more than likely, I am going to hurt you... A thick skin and a stout heart..

Submissive but not a doormat.. There is nothing sweeter than a strong confident butch looking me in the eyes and saying they are mine.. Someone who says *Yes, Dear* most of the time, but if they reach a hard line for them.. Then it's *No, Dear*... mmmmmm tasty....

A Poly Heart.. This is massivly important.. even if our relationship is a closed one... There has to be a possiblility of the relationship being open if desired..

Understand.. truely understand that I am a sadistic stone leaning switch... If I am in Top mode, then I have no desire to be touched and there is going to be pain invoved on your part... If I am in sub mode, then I have no desire to touch sexualy, no desire to cause pain.... Did I say that I was a gemini? Lol

[hippieflowergirl]

i dont want to be string beans. i want to be dessert.*

i dont want to be a guilty pleasure. i want to be an every day phenomenon.

i dont want to be someone You turn to. i want to be the one You turn to.

i dont want to be treated as though i'm precious or fragile. i want you to sink your teeth into my very real vulnerability and own it savagely, in the same way You own Your own soul.

i am not a princess. that doesnt mean You cant treat me like one on occasion.

i dont want a Love who has no weakness and no tender places. i want a Love who knows that my own little ways and means are strong enough to bolster His momentary hesitation, soothe His deepest hurts, and support His wildest dreams...all without breaking a sweat....or a nail. i also want Him to know...at the cellular level...that i would willingly claw my way through cement to keep Him from harm.

i do not want, need or even desire perfection. i want humanity in abundance, unraveled feelings and confusing discussions and uninhibited tears and laughter and honesty of the brutal variety. i want to hold hands when discussing disappointment and frustration. i want to curl into His shoulder when crying over disappointments and anger. i want to be invited to be flawed and not discounted for it.

i want to feed His body, His desires, His mind and His soul with the poetry of food, fantasy, philosophy and infinity. i do not want to be "all" that He needs. i want to stand, complete in myself, hand in hand with all that He is.


*(long story)

[Gemme]

I need plenty of breathing space and my honey to have the patience of a saint while I struggle with the inevitable issues that I have been and will continue to struggle with all of my life. Though we are both very human and fallible, I think I'm pretty lucky in this department. :stillheart:

[Blade]

Perfectly said Ms. Rogue perfectly!

What things do you need to make a relationship last? What things do you look for in a potential partner and why? What things will you NOT tolerate from a relationship?

For me.. relationships are alot of work.. and it takes 2 devoted people to work at it.. relationships are NOT one sided.. there is always 2 sides.. always 2 people (in most cases) *gryn and always twice the amount of work.. working toward life goals and decisions..

To make a relationship last I would require the following things..

* friendship
* open communication - keeps the relationship alive - ask for what you want and need from each other
* loyalty & trust - without this you don't have anything
* hard work and dedication - can lead to a lifetime of happiness
* faith - in the both of us that we are in this together for the long haul

I look for these things in a potential partner..

* friendship
* Love - because it is not just about the good times - love endures all
* Respect - because without it there can only be hurt and pain
* Honesty - because without that you don't have trust
* Trust - because you will make life decisions together or for each other and you have to trust in those decisions
* Monogamy - because I don't like to share emotionally
* Morals, Values & Integrity - because it shows true strength of character

I will NOT tolerate the following from a partner or a relationship..

* Dishonesty - because it hinders trust and you need that to succeed
* Cheating - because it hurts the soul and kills the love
* Disrespect - because it makes you feel belittled and used
* Abuse - in any form, be it, mental, physical, emotional etc. Because it is WRONG - and makes you feel unimportant and harms your sence of self worth

These are my thoughts and perceptions on potential partners and relationships.. I would like to hear your thoughts as well in case I have something new to learn or something new to add to my list..

I posted this some time ago on another site.. but thought it would do well here so I brought it over!

*hugs*
Rogue

[Jet]

Someone who is secure in their sexuality and sticks with it.

I never saw this thread until now.

[Strappie]

I "want" to be happy... but "need" a girl *smirk*

[LieslKate]

I need someone who can make some kickin' French toast.

I make kick-ass french toast... stuffed sometimes too! Serve it with real butter and warmed maple syrup with lil sausages and bacon on the side... and I have references for it's yummability !

:chef:

[Jet]

I make kick-ass french toast... stuffed sometimes too! Serve it with real butter and warmed maple syrup with lil sausages and bacon on the side... and I have references for it's yummability !

:chef:

Marry me.....

[Just_G]

In any relationship, whether it be with friends or a possible partner, I first and foremost must have trust and honesty. If I can't trust someone, they can't get close to me and I cannot open up to them, and vice versa. I love having healthy, positive, fun people in my life....I refuse to let the unhealthy ones in my life.

When it comes to finding a partner, humor is a MUST for me! I would like to have some things in common, but we don't have to have EVERYTHING in common. I like to do my own thing on occasion, whether it is a boy's night out or hanging with my sister. I also like it when they have things that they want to and can do without me being there all the time.

I would like to have a family. It is just my mom, my sister, and I (and I work with my dad), and I hope that whomever I meet has a family that is welcoming and accepting of our relationship. The possiblility of kids is also something to consider, but the older I get, the less likely that is to happen.

My last gf was what I would consider too time consuming...and perhaps I felt that way because she was not the one. I don't have to be with someone 24/7, but when the right one comes along, I might feel differently. Though I don't ever see myself being the 24/7 kinda guy. I like my ME time....my tool time that settles my mind and makes me productive.

[LieslKate]

Marry me.....

hmmmmmmmm maybe... :innocent: grits with that roasted peach and pecan stuffed french toast?

[Sachita]

I use to have a list. It included everything Rogue had on her list and probably a few more things. I spent most of my adult life single. At first it was my choice because I looked around me and didnt see anything about a relationship I wanted for my life. The couples I knew were fighting and the often had secrets. The expectations within a relationship were just too much for me.

Eventually I got around to giving it a roll. I had some good ones, really bad ones and to be honest a list didnt mean anything. In my last relationship, it was awful and it kept me down for a few years but as I look back I see how much it taught me and prepared me for the love of my life.

Today I want someone that is mature, intelligent and compassionate towards humans and animals. Someone that sees the big picture and isnt going to get caught up in the small shit. That if we dont agree, thats ok, we move on and if we fight, thats ok too as long as we stay focused on the big picture.

Today I will not settle for less then I know I deserve and I refuse to be in a relationship just because I'm lonely. Today I want a partner in life and not just a lustful interlude.

I know he will make mistakes and I also know sometimes we'll go in separate directions/paths for a while just as long as we come back around and remember why we got together in the first place.

I am convinced that the secret to a really great relationship is to be commitment in each others happiness. That each day you put your selfishness aside and find ways to make each other happy. It can be anything but the day you dont want to do things to make them happy is the day it begins to fall apart.

[Blade]

Wise wise Lady


I am convinced that the secret to a really great relationship is to be commitment in each others happiness. That each day you put your selfishness aside and find ways to make each other happy. It can be anything but the day you dont want to do things to make them happy is the day it begins to fall apart.

[suebee]

I guess there are some basic things we all want in a partner, otherwise it's just being with someone because we don't want to be alone. But what I've learned over the years is that it's the person's soul I fall in love with. Pretty much everything else is negotiable.

[Sachita]

I guess there are some basic things we all want in a partner, otherwise it's just being with someone because we don't want to be alone. But what I've learned over the years is that it's the person's soul I fall in love with. Pretty much everything else is negotiable.

For me this is true. Anyone I've ever been with I knew instantly. In fact I can sometimes see a name, never meet someone face to face but somehow know they will be in my life even if just passing through. I've always had this. The only difference today, for me is that I dont try and project shit that isnt there. When you're younger you fall in lust and your mind starts creating a relationship based on what you need and desire. You build this perfect love in your mind & heart then when they fall short you're disappointed and its downhill from there.

My honey is a man in every sense of the word. If you asked me 10 years ago if I'd ever date a man I'd laugh at you. In fact my family thought I was teasing them at first. But you see that isnt an issue here because right away we made a soulful connection, not based on what we had or what gender we are. Now it did scare the shit out of us because we had never done that before, quite like that but as we talked, learned more about how compatible we are the more drawn we were to be together.

You can have all the lust and fireworks in the world but if you're not on the same page you'll struggle. I could have enjoyed him, the ride but I partner with him because we share the same moral convictions, lifestyle interest, animals, spiritual, etc. We are almost the same in many ways yet different and definitely a masculine/feminine dynamic which is important to both of us. In fact essential.

For me it has to make sense. Otherwise I'm happy to love someone, laugh with them and be close without sharing my life. Sharing my life, a marriage, etc. requires a hearty foundation.

[Miss_Tia]

I use to have this laundry list of what I looked for in someone. It started it out with the "givens"..honesty, faithfulness, emotionally available, sober, good conversationalist, responsible, financially secure, developmentally mature, good hygiene, accepting of my daughter, understands my love of horses, and of course, trustworthy.

I have dated people who were not those things...in one or more ways. I thought that I could ignore these characteristics I desired or I thought they had the potential for these things and in time would come around to them.

I was just plain stupid in thinking that! But until recently, I was angry at them for not meeting up with my desires.

Fairly recently I have pretty much decided that the real answer lies in me. I need to be all of the above and not quiver away from it when the other person doesnt seem to fit. Its ME that doesnt fit them! ME!

So, I have worked hard at making sure I am secure in myself and that I have myself, what characteristics I want in someone else.

right now I have a LDR with a very nice guy. We are moving very slowly...very very slowly....meaning no geographic changes, and no making decisions in our personal lives based on the other person. We love and care for the other...but we both are working on ourselves. Until we are ready, we simply arent ready for the Big Stuff.

So...what I needed in someone, was for them not to grab for the brass ring when the ride just started. What I needed was to have that brass ring and enjoy it and wait awhile befire I am willing to share it with someone else, and not just give them a free ride.

What I want, is to live happily ever after...and what I know, is I am doing that..with or without someone. I am the only one who can make me happy. Me. Someone can match me, like a twin, in happiness but I am not relying on anyone again, to do for me what I need to do for myself.

I am so much calmer nowadays...lol.

[Just_G]

I have never been the type that can't live happily unless partnered with someone...quite the opposite really. I will admit that I have gotten into a couple of relationships that I knew in my heart wouldn't work out....as my gut is never wrong....but when all of my friends are coupled and I was the only single going to all the events with them, it got old, so I thought I could make something work with someone. WRONGO G!

I have learned that I would rather be alone for the right reasons than with someone for the wrong ones.

Sachita is the one that mentioned secrets I believe (without going back and looking..correct me if I am wrong), and while I think everyone has skeletons in their closets, myself included, I think that secrets in relationships do not work out in the end. I try to be an open book to everyone I know...within limits of course, but I don't want secrets to come between us. Feelings get hurt, resentment starts, trust is damaged, and those are all things that are hard to overcome and move on from....yet they are all things that you need in any kind of relationship. One of my exes kept some things from me that my friends knew about, and after the break up, they all came to me and told me they knew...which then made me resent them in a way because they didn't come to me sooner. I thought my friends were supposed to be there for me....not just after the fact, but when it went down so that I didn't get hurt to begin with. I had to distance myself from them and when I see them out, they want to act like nothing is wrong and hang out like before.

My grandma always said, "secrets don't make friends". Wise woman! So, I don't think secrets have any room in a relationship.

[bigbutchmistie]

As others have stated I make myself happy. And I do enjoy my alone tiime, as well. That being said when I seek a partner I seek for starters basic things I need just for a friendship. I dont want someone in my life that isnt honest and who I cant trust. That being said here are the other things on my list per say :

Loyalty. Has staying power through good times and bad.

Able to laugh

Communication. Can talk to her about anything

Someone my age or older

Someone who lives in Dallas/Fort Worth

Someone who can accept the fact that I do not have family.

Someone who like me doesnt have or doesnt want kids

Someone who doesnt have cats

Very Affectionate

Passionate

Romantic

Nurturing

Sensitive

Someone who will attend services with me

Financially Secure

Good Hygeine

Kind to animals, kids and older people

Someone who is monogamous


What I will not tolerate is:

Lying

Cheating

Abuse of any kind emotional or physical

[Jet]

As others have stated I make myself happy. And I do enjoy my alone tiime, as well. That being said when I seek a partner I seek for starters basic things I need just for a friendship. I dont want someone in my life that isnt honest and who I cant trust. That being said here are the other things on my list per say :

Loyalty. Has staying power through good times and bad.

Able to laugh

Communication. Can talk to her about anything

Someone my age or older

Someone who lives in Dallas/Fort Worth

Someone who can accept the fact that I do not have family.

Someone who like me doesnt have or doesnt want kids

Someone who doesnt have cats

Very Affectionate

Passionate

Romantic

Nurturing

Sensitive

Someone who will attend services with me

Financially Secure

Good Hygeine

Kind to animals, kids and older people

Someone who is monogamous


What I will not tolerate is:

Lying

Cheating

Abuse of any kind emotional or physical

nice thoughts Misty. do they have to be good lookin? otherwise i was going to fly down and take you out to dinner, lol

[Jet]

hmmmmmmmm maybe... :innocent: grits with that roasted peach and pecan stuffed french toast?

have to pass on the grits, darlin'

[Semantics]

1. Should have the ability to cock one eyebrow at me.
2. Must like children, animals, and plants.
3. I’ll share my closet but not my bookshelf. Bring your own.
4. I don't mind weird but I don't do well with inconsistent.
5. Should be non-religious.
6. Unwillingness to let me push the cart in the grocery store is a deal breaker.
7. Never, ever compare my Italian Greyhound to a rat.

[bigbutchmistie]

I should add to mine :)

Someone who is a complete girly girl. But who isnt materialistic or stuck up.

Down to earth, and funny, kind and sweet. Someone with a huge heart like mine...

I love to spoil and pamper my partner. Someone who loves it but doesnt expect it.

[LieslKate]

I "want" to be happy... but "need" a girl *smirk*

Dammit you haven't found one yet???????? What are all those Minnesotaaaa grrlies thinking????

:lips:

[LieslKate]

have to pass on the grits, darlin'

NO grits??????????? Ohhhhhhhhhhh wait you are a GA transplant... skip the grits... how about lots of good, dark coffee with real cream??

[LieslKate]

A well seasoned Butch... confident, comfy in their own skin, must LOVE sex, monogamous, a sense of humour, adores Femmes, snogging and has not forgotten how to play... in every sense of the word !

[bigbutchmistie]

I forgot to add. A girly girl that accepts the fact that I am trans.

[apretty]

1. Should have the ability to cock one eyebrow at me.
2. Must like children, animals, and plants.
3. I’ll share my closet but not my bookshelf. Bring your own.
4. I don't mind weird but I don't do well with inconsistent.
5. Should be non-religious.
6. Unwillingness to let me push the cart in the grocery store is a deal breaker.
7. Never, ever compare my Italian Greyhound to a rat.

great list!

[SouthernStud]

i would make a negotiation on the cooking part...ill be ya cookin daddy if u do the cleanin!!! Now it wouldnt be exactly fair for me to do all the work....and that includes ALL aspects...not just cookin and cleanin!!! Use ur brains for just a moment...ahhh it just dawned on u what i was saying. Thats right,i said it...if i can cook for my woman and occasionally clean,then u can save a horse and ride a cowboy...cuz thats just SEXY AS FUK!!!!! :tease:

[little_ms_sunshyne]

Hmmmm...Hadnt seen this thread...

Wants & Needs

~ A great sense of humor (although I am pretty easy to make laugh)

~ Optimisitc

~ A warm smile

~ Kind to others

~ Telling Eyes

~ A nice bottom lip that I can tug on when we kiss

~ Ambitious

~ Someone who is not afraid to take control...

~but can sit back and watch me when I decide to...

~ Gentleman

~Passionate, Lustful, and Loving (yes rolled up into one)

~ Someone I can drive nuts on a regular basis :)

Is this too much to ask for?? lol Oh and if they are my height or taller a plus :) Ok done...just saying..We can dream right?

[nicetgurl_30]

Let's see I'm older now so:

Honest
Family-centered
Sense of humor
Likes God
Playful "trying new things"
Has a job
Likes artsy things
And my obsessive need to practice tantric things
*stayin in bed on rainin days ( I have no tv in bedroom) u get the hint...
Communicate To Me

[Miss_Tia]

I have learned so much about myself this year!

I learned I need to be the Dominant in a relationship.

I learned I need to be in a female run relationship...meaning regardless of what gender I date, *I* am the one who leads in the dance

I learned I need to be the lead in bed too. And I need to be with someone I can reciprocate sex with. While I have enjoyed my time with Stone Butches, I know to be sexually satisfied, I need to be the one giving. And if *I* feel like it, he can give back.

I learned I need this to be a 24/7 in and out of bed

I learned I am not shy sexually and certainly not submissive. Assertive doesnt even begin to define what I am in this realm and trying to be anything different (a role I was taught to play from childhood) just wasnt working for me

I learned that I am still coming into myself and am single for this reason. I dont want to mull it over while engaging with the energy of another person.

[Blaze]

I am at the 3/4 part of my life.
I really don't have expectations anymore.
I do want to have the freedom to do what makes me happy.
As I would give you the same respect to have happiness.
I don't want to have a list anymore, to much paper work to keep up with.
I would like the respect part of the relationship to be there.
I guess basically what I'm saying is when the right person comes along.
It's most fitting to say both will be different, and it's up to the both of you
to establish a well balanced relationship. You can't change anyone, nor expect them to change, because it's what you want.
As relationships grow, we to change, and sometimes the change is together, other times there changes that are apart.
If you grow apart, it's okay, because we all move at our own pace. Only then will you know if you can go on together or it's time to seperate.
Which ever it is. The love and respect will always be there. Because no only were you lovers, but you are best friends, and friends are there no matter if your up or down.
Once again, no more expectations in my life... Live hard, live fully, open your eyes...........

[SouthernStud]

Hmmmm...Hadnt seen this thread...

Wants & Needs

~ A great sense of humor (although I am pretty easy to make laugh)

~ Optimisitc

~ A warm smile

~ Kind to others

~ Telling Eyes

~ A nice bottom lip that I can tug on when we kiss

~ Ambitious

~ Someone who is not afraid to take control...

~but can sit back and watch me when I decide to...

~ Gentleman

~Passionate, Lustful, and Loving (yes rolled up into one)

~ Someone I can drive nuts on a regular basis :)

Is this too much to ask for?? lol Oh and if they are my height or taller a plus :) Ok done...just saying..We can dream right?
Hmmmmm.... *thinks to self* :deepthoughts: ....ummmm how tall are u exactly??? :tease:

[Cajun_dee]

at the risk of sounding needy I would rather say is that I do best with someone who is not afraid and can handle me! Someone who wants the same things in life as I do, someone who is not afraid to lock the chains to me...someone who is not afraid to cage me. Someone who is interested enough to see past the crap and to the next layer. Someone who is not afraid to give me what I really need especially when I need it. Someone who is real and lives and walks their own truth. Someone who is not afraid to tell me what they need and want. Someone who challenges me and puts me in my place when I push the line. Someone who is tender when it's needed and also throw me to my knees when it's time.. Someone who is not afraid to commit and capable of loving themselves enough to take care of themselves.. someone who takes responsibility seriously and acts accordingly. Someone who I can't live without. Someone willing to walk the walk... not just talk the talk.

and oh, must love dogs.

[Luckydwg07]

a brainy & sensual femme who can think on many levels.
its ok not to agree however people who discount ideas without exploring them bother me

[guihong]

Not looking, but this comes to mind:

*All the character traits everyone says-honesty, responsible, committed to personal growth, etc.

*Great sense of humor. Don't ever go with someone who can't make you laugh.

*Likes pets and kids

*Lots of interests (and hopefully share some of mine)

*Likes to get out of the house on weekends. Bonus for getting out of the country ;).

*Likes to read and discuss books

*Physically active. Don't have to be ripped, but working on themselves is nice.

*Not extreme when it comes to religion or politics

*Gets along well with other people-likes friends. Not necessarily outgoing or the "life of the party", but someone who likes people.

*Sensual and very sexual. Romantic in that she does little things, not necessarily candy and flowers type stuff.