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Kobi
06-05-2011, 04:15 AM
This was an interesting article:



By EILEEN NG, Associated Press Eileen Ng, Associated Press – 2 hrs 8 mins ago

RAWANG, Malaysia – As a new bride, 22-year-old Ummu Atirah believes she knows the secret to a blissful marriage: obey her husband and ensure he is sexually satisfied.

Ummu and some 800 other Muslim women in Malaysia are members of the "Obedient Wives Club" that is generating controversy in one of the most modern and progressive Muslim-majority nations, where many Muslim Malaysian women hold high posts in the government and corporate world.

The new club, launched Saturday, says it can cure social ills such as prostitution and divorce by teaching women to be submissive and keep their men happy in the bedroom.

"Islam compels us to be obedient to our husband. Whatever he says, I must follow. It is a sin if I don't obey and make him happy," said Ummu, who wore a yellow headscarf.

The club, founded by a fringe Islamic group known as Global Ikhwan, has been dismissed by politicians and activists as a throwback to Medieval times and an insult to modern women of Malaysia. But the group's activities, which previously included the setting up of a Polygamy Club, show that pockets of conservative Islamic ideas still thrive in Malaysia.

Groups such as Global Ikhwan are unlikely to gain much popularity beyond generating shock value. Still, there is concern that radical groups could garner support among other Muslims, who make up 60 percent of the 28 million population, and upset decades of carefully nurtured racial and religious harmony.

"Unfortunately even today, there are still many Muslim women who are ignorant of their rights or culturally inhibited to exercise their rights in full," said Shahrizat Abdul Jalil, a female Muslim minister in charge of family policy.

Despite the group's conservative Islamic background, Rohayah Mohamad, one of the founders of the club, openly talks about the virtues of marital sex even though most of her colleagues are shy about the topic.

"Sex is a taboo in Asian society. We have ignored it in our marriages but it's all down to sex. A good wife is a good sex worker to her husband. What is wrong with being a whore ... to your husband?" she said.

"This way, the family institution is protected and we can curb social ills," said Rohayah, the club's vice president who is also a trained physician.

She said wives must go beyond the traditional roles as good cooks or good mothers and learn to "obey, serve and entertain" their husbands to prevent them from straying or misbehaving.

Indirectly, "disobedient wives are the cause for upheaval in this world" because men are not happy at home and their minds and souls are disturbed, she said.

Authorities recently said Malaysia's divorce rate has doubled from 2002 to 2009 with higher rates among Malay Muslims.

"When husbands come home, wives do not welcome their husbands with warm alluring smiles and sexy dressing ... That is the reality today," she said.

The Global Ikhwan group is an offshoot of former members of the Al-Arqam sect outlawed in 1994 after its teachings were found to have deviated from Islam. It is funded by the group's restaurants, grocery stores, poultry and other businesses abroad.

Most of the 800 women who are members of the new club, including Ummu the new bride, also belong to Al-Arqam.

Expectedly, the club has faced intense criticism.

Some Malaysians started a Facebook page called "We do not want sexist nonsense from Global Ikhwan."

One Muslim man, Amirul Aftar, wrote: "I do not want a wife to submit to my every beck and call. I want a wife who understands me ... we are not your masters, we are your equal."

Women's group, Sisters in Islam, said Islam advocates marriages based on mutual cooperation and respect. It said domestic violence happens regardless of women's behavior.

"Communication, not submission, is vital to sustain any healthy relationship," it said.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20110605/ap_on_re_as/as_malaysia_obedient_wives

iamkeri1
06-05-2011, 02:27 PM
This group is Muslim. It could easily be Christian, or Jewish for that matter. These are very commonly held religious beliefs. The following is a story from a Christian perspective.

Several years ago a very good friend of mine was being physically (and mentally) abused by her husband of 17 years. She left the home and went to a shelter. He talked her in to coming home and getting marriage counseling - with their pastor of course.The pastor told her she was fat, lazy, disobedient to her husband, and neglectful of her duties as a wife (I am not referring to sex here. She loves sex and would do pretty much anything her husband wanted in bed.) He on the other hand, withheld sex from her on a regular basis. "What do you expect", the pastor said, "you're so fat who WOULD want to have sex with you." They stayed together; the abuse continued.

Four years later her (12 year old) daughter reveals the guy had been molesting her since she was nine. The whole time he had told the daughter that her mother (my friend) had wanted him to do what he did to her - that her mother knew and approved of what he did. Social services believed the daughter, took all three of my friends children, put them in foster care, and terminated both parents rights. My friends has never seen her kids since. The father went to prison for six years. If my friend has trusted herself instead of her pastor, she might have kept her daughter from being abused, and she would not have lost her children.

The point is, any religion (or political party for that matter) that supports the subjegation of women is wrong, evil and to put it mildly, dangerous.
Smooches,
Keri

Quintease
06-06-2011, 10:37 AM
22-year-old Ummu Atirah believes she knows the secret to a blissful marriage: obey her husband and ensure he is sexually satisfied.

The sad thing is, that she's right. There is nothing wrong with doing what your partner wants and keeping them happy in bed. When it goes both ways it is the secret to a happy marriage and for that reason it's what the Christian God wanted for his disciples, as did the Hindu Gods*.

The problem happened when people took the word 'obey' to mean 'slave', and forgot that men also had a duty to their wives in the eye of their deity.

I just hope Ummu and her husband are genuinely happy and it's not just her way of fulfilling her imagined societal role.



*see also http://www.surrenderedwife.com/