Regrets...Do You Have One or Some?

[Soon]

Sometimes, admitting what we regret may shine light on what we should do in the future, or put an event/feeling in the past in perspective and enlighten us on our future paths.

What are some of your major regrets in life?

One of mine is not spending enough time with my father before he passed. I was young, still resentful of their treatment of me when I was an adolescent, and shied away from him. I regret not going over more and visiting when I should have and fleeing the scene so to speak.

[Just_G]

I have very few regrets because I think that even if something happens that would usually trigger the feeling of regret, I have learned from those events and have applied it to how I live and love now.

The regrets I do have are as follows:

1. I regret losing my retainer when I was 13....and not getting another one.

2. I regret dropping out of playing sports because I was bullied and not really all that welcomed in the girls locker room because they thought I was such a "freak". I know I could have gotten a full ride scholarship for basketball somewhere.

3. I regret not going away to college and getting out from under the family.


All these years later though, I am making up for a couple of these things. I have gone back to college and will have my degree in March, and I am now playing tackle football for the Kansas City Tribe. I am making it up to myself for dropping out of sports and for not going to college. (both of which, were huge fears of mine all these years)

The whole retainer thing will come later once I get a great job with decent dental benefits. :winky:

[Rockinonahigh]

The one thing I wish I could change that would hopefully have been better for my family at the time,was not to help a friend of my eldest son when she was in a bad fix with going to juvi hall because of some issues.This so called girl who I had no clue to who she was needed a safe place to stay insted of going to juvi hall till her grandparrents got to shreveport to pick her up in two days.It ws a disaster for my family,all I was doing was to help a child in need.This kid was like an thng from another world a sneeky theiveing B*^%h
No grand parrents came so I told the cps to come gether cause I couldnt handle what was going on in my house,I tryed to do the right thing but then the popo didnt even help when she ,her friends and my eldest striped my house bare and then disapeired for three years.I thought my son woth get tired of that kind of life but It took him ten years to finaly divorce her.
There are other things I wish I hadnt done but seamed right at the time,but this was the biggie.

[Apocalipstic]

Our lives make us who we are :)

But I regret most giving away my two beloved cats years ago because my new GF at the time was allergic.

I miss them.

[Blade]

Like HSIN and Just G many of my regrets stem from not making the effort to spend time with people who are now gone. Pa died the week before my 40th birthday and Nannie Nov 4th last year.

Like Just G I regret quitting playing sports I was good at, due to the same reasons.

Also regret not finishing college, and want to add how much I admire those of you who are able to go back and complete it. I can't do work and school at the same time, it keeps my mind so busy I can't sleep.

Although I should be proud of working at the same place for 25 yrs I regret not jumping out there and changing jobs about every 5 or 6 years, to give myself experience at other things.

[CockyDude]

I've always tried to replace feeling regret with learning something. Would I like to be able to change a few things along the way? Absolutely but in the end all of our experiences add up to equal the whole of who we are; regrets and all.

Vafrsflot3k

[1QuirkyKiwi]

I've made choices in my life based on how I felt, my experiences and resources at THAT time in my life - they haven't always been the best of choices, yet, my life has been an adventure with the ups and downs. I've walked my own path in life - not always so sure of the way.

It's not a regret as such; more a desire that I hoped to achieve after my studies finished in London in the early 90s. I'd planned on doing a Masters degree in Textile conservation and working as a Curator of Textile restoration and preservation.

"Bumps, bruises, joy and laughter. What a wonderful Tapestry it makes in life!"

[Greyson]

One of my biggest regrets is dabbling in drugs and alcohol when I was a teenager. At the age of 15 I had an auto accident that changed my life.

Initially I was pronounced permanently disabled from this auto accident. Joining the Marine Corp when I graduated from High School was no longer an option for me. This was my plan to begin my adult life and find a way to get my college education.

I have wondered what my life would look like today if I had kept my physical ability with the belief in myself and the kindness of others. My life has turned out blessed but I know it would have been different.

[Stacy]

I only have one true regret. It is the one thing I can honestly say that I do not think it would affect where I am in my life at all right now, having not had this person in it. Yes, it is a person.

[princessbelle]

One regret that stands out in my mind is not having more children. Being married to a bio man it is really a wonder i had any at all, looking back....lol.

But, knowing what i know now, i would have left that relationship way before 17 years of it and would have been artificially inseminated at least a couple of more times.

I would have loved to have had a girl, but even if i had continued to have boys, i enjoyed being pregnant and i loved raising children. It is very hard for me to know i am too old to do this anymore and honestly it has been a very painful acceptance.

If i had to do over, i would definitely had more children, probably had a house full. :)

[Quintease]

Regrets... I have a few... but then again... too few to mention...

Growing old is a privilege denied to many...Never leave behind regrets...

I regret the things I didn't do, it's true. I regret not saving, I regret not caring more about others, I regret not sticking to things that I was good at. I regret not walking when I was unhappy, I regret not holding my peace when it didn't matter. I regret not accepting help when I was offered to me, I regret not accepting that some things I just could not do on my own. I regret not finishing my degree, I regret that I didn't know what love was until it found me. I regret wasting my time on the unworthy. I regret not thinking about the future until it forced itself upon me. I regret so much and yet so little.

I don't regret ending up the person that I now am.

[bigbutchmistie]

Regret.... Hmmm I have a few... One is that I never stopped being angry with my mom when she was alive for giving my brother and I up for adoption.

I regret that I never told her that I forgave her, and never really used my time that I had with her. I wished she would have died knowing I forgave her.

The same thing in regards to my grandmother. She died not long after I met her, and she knew I held her responsible for not taking care of my brother and I when the state offered us to them. She died before I could ever tell her I forgave her.

[betenoire]

I regret not going to University. I wanted to teach highschool English.

[Queerasfck]

Once an ex stole my George Foreman grill when we broke up. It had only been used once and was one of those cool outdoor ones that ran on propane. I regret that I let her drive away with it in her car and I didn't stop her.

On a more serious note, I stayed with another ex way longer than I should have trying to make it work when the love wasn't there. DUMB.

[Novelafemme]

One regret that stands out in my mind is not having more children. Being married to a bio man it is really a wonder i had any at all, looking back....lol.

But, knowing what i know now, i would have left that relationship way before 17 years of it and would have been artificially inseminated at least a couple of more times.

I would have loved to have had a girl, but even if i had continued to have boys, i enjoyed being pregnant and i loved raising children. It is very hard for me to know i am too old to do this anymore and honestly it has been a very painful acceptance.

If i had to do over, i would definitely had more children, probably had a house full. :)



*packing up one sassy ten year old girl and shipping her off to Princessbelle ASAP. ;)

[julieisafemme]

Not too many. The number one is getting married to my former spouse a second time in a religious ceremony. Worst mistake I have ever made in my life and hurtful to so many people. The shame of that mistake kept me paralyzed before finally coming out and living an authentic life as a lesbian femme.

[Miss July]

When I was younger, not believing in myself, settling for far less than I deserved.
Staying in a relationship that was unfulfilling, to make some one else happy.
Letting other's dictate how the out come of situtations should be.

Thankfully I am learning every day to try and live with no more regrets.

[turasultana]

not buying that damn apartment in the LES for 70K back in the day cause it was "too small." It's worth over 700K now. oy.

[UofMfan]

Aht9hcDFyVw


I see everything that I have done and lived through as building blocks of who I am today. I have made many mistakes, but regrets, very few.

I rather spend my time learning from than regretting.

[Cowboi]

Regrets.....I have a few. Whats done is done. I'm thinkin without them though, I might not be where I am today. It has been a interesting trip though, and as I always say...Its all about the road trip.

[durrrrrrrr]

should of, would of, could of

ayup, I have regrets.

not spending more time with my Mother, but at the age of 13, why would I been thinking she was going to pass away.

Regret, not speaking up to my Dad sooner then what I had. but , i did, finally.

not letting people get close to me, my heart, when I was younger ( 20's )

some others, may have been regrets at the time, but I am where i am right now because of those choices, and everything is alright.

[Strappie]

Still to this day and everyday since that day I said the 2 powerful words to my mom as a young teen... "Fuck You".... She never said a word to me about it.. because she knew I would regret it till the day I die.... God Mom's are so smart!!

I don't regret much at all ... Because it's the path I've chose to take there for it's not a regret.... I just regret those two powerful words.

[Leigh]

Yes I do have regrets and I will probably have them for awhile, however I wil no longer let them dictate to Me who I will be in future years :thumbsup:

[smouldering]

I do have some regrets but I think the biggest one that I have would be with my mom.. I regret not spending more time with her, I feel guilty that she had a stroke that caused her health to deteriorate rapidly until she passed in March, A part of me feels like if spent more time with her, i might have been able to prevent the direction her health took.. This is something that will pain me and i will think about until the day i die..

[ruby_woo]

I'm already regretting not spending more time back home with my family. We used to be a close-knit family, but it's hard to feel close to everyone when you're 2000 miles away and in a different country.

Strangely, not sure if I regret not finishing college or not. If I hadn't finished college, I may not have moved to San Francisco where I had a great and hilarious three years, I may not have met my partner...Hmm.

[cuddlyfemme]

I regret hurting a close friend, verbally
I regret not finishing college...maybe (key word "maybe') finding a job would be easier
I regret not being closer with m family

[Gemme]

The regret well runs deep for me.

[LipstickLola]

The regret well runs deep for me.

Double Ditto :(

[kannon]

Maybe a few.
http://www.mybadpad.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/corpse-freezer.jpg

[Honey]

Hahahaha...Holy crap! That is f'n twisted !! Nice !

[kannon]

Hahahaha...Holy crap! That is f'n twisted !! Nice !

I regret this incarnation, or should I say reincarnation, which the bibilical interpretation means "made flesh"

http://laurenkatz.files.wordpress.com/2010/05/06bbdf26f70f60d9-1.jpg

[always2late]

I honestly believe that all the things we do, all the people we let into our lives, lead us to where and who we are now, so I try not to regret. When I look back on my life, there is very little I would change....even the bad things. Because they made me all the stronger for it. Even the times I regret being married to my son's father for all those years before I figured myself out...I tell myself that if not for that time, I wouldn't have my beautiful son. If there is one thing I COULD change, it would be deciding to go back to school sooner...but I'm going now, so I guess that's what really counts.

[WingsOnFire]

I regret that I have spent so much of my life running at warp speed. Having gone through the 6 days of hell we went through I am now realizing what its like to have your world turned upside down with all sorts of fuckery.. Thats ok, because it also showed me that I need to slow down and take better care of myself.

Today for the first time I really... really.... allowed Damon to take control of things. I have always been the strong one through out my life.. I have a tendency to put on tough armor and try to do everything myself.. This has been a source of contention for me in my journey.

But after being semi taken advantage of by work today and another situation Damon has put his foot down and will be the buffer between me and the world of chaos. I dont regret always trying to help everyone else.. however, I now realize that I need to come first.

I DOOOOO regret having to have this damn packing changed.. it hurts!

[Gina]

Someone once said - which would you rather live with: Regret or Guilt? I am thinking I regretted some things and can live with it. Guilt on the other hand, is another matter...

[WolfyOne]

Perhaps the only regrets I have was hurting others
Learning from those regrets helped to mold the me I am today
I went to the school of hard knocks and just had to do things my way
I have over the years, learned to listen more, so when I'm relationship ready,
I'll be able to share instead of it being my way or the highway
No more running away for me when Ms Right and I finally meet
I'm thankful to my last ex for opening up my eyes in order for me to open my ears

[Delish]

Most recent regret....dating a liar -sigh-

[Soon]

Regret: assuming the worst, instead of hoping for the best.

[Kenna]

Yeah.... after my dad passed away, my brother asked me to move closer to him and his girls. I regret not taking him up on his offer...I really miss them bad. After being separated from him for most our lives... I shouldn't have answered " this place is a ghost town, I can't find a job here". ...when in fact I had made a selfish decision to move some place else but should have put my family first. If I had...then I could be watching my nieces grow up now.

[Thamca74]

I regret not being a better partner to my ex girlfriend. She was my soulmate. I am not just saying that-- no one will ever "get" me like she did. I miss her so much but know that to much has happened to go back. (glad to get that off my chest)

I also regret not going back to school -- I am not sure that I have it in me now to even care to try. That is a very mild regret. I think there are some regrets that you can easily live with.

Wish I would have spent more time with my son when he was young instead of putting it off. If you have young kids-- be warned : the time sneaks up fast....All of a sudden one day you get home from work and the damn kid is a man.. true story. Life is full of regrets and guilt. BUT darn it, I did what I thought was right at the time.. Life goes on. Live and learn

[Gráinne]

I regret if my words or actions hurt another person, that's true. But whatever I've done has taught me something, so I try not to regret. If I chose differently, I wouldn't have the same friends (or family) as I do now.

I've made mistakes, but I've also had great experiences, and it's been quite a ride.

[pinkgeek]

I regret I didn't believe I was beautiful, brilliant and capable when I was 16.. Bulletproof was not the same as confident....

[Miss Scarlett]

Non! Je ne regrette rien...

Everything that's happened in my life, even the really bad stuff, was for a reason and made me the person i am now.

[Hack]

I've made mistakes. It is called part of life. I have learned from most of them. In a few cases, I have not and was doomed to repeat them. When I screw something up, I take it apart, much like I took apart every broken toy as a kid to see how it worked, what could fix it, etc. Make mistakes, try to learn from them, try not to make them again, keep moving forward all the time. That is what I do.

[Rox]

Guess we all have regrets~But with every regret, is a life lesson. At least from my experiences.)

[Bad_boi]

I have made my fair share of mistakes. I admit that.

No regrets, just lessons learned.

[macele]

i think of regrets as things i could have controlled and didn't. and i am sorry. we can forgive ourselves, but we can't forget. the regrets will always be there (i haven't forgot them yet).

i've really junked some things up in my life. like others have said, i've learned from many. i have more satisfaction and gratitude than regrets. living mistakes are fixable, ... surely most are. but i still wish i hadn't done. i'd take them back if i could.

most of the time, we have time to think before we act. that would be great if i did, ... most of the time lol.

[girl_dee]

Relationships ~ no regrets for getting into them or leaving them when i did

i regret spending too much time on people who didn't make me a priority and putting my own well being aside, letting my own dreams pale in the shadows of trying to please others

[Mr Nice Guy]

Moving to NH
Moving mom in.
Enough said.

[Ginger]

Regret is useful. It means you have a conscience, that you are learning from your missteps.


Kathryn Schulz: Don't regret regret - YouTube

[Glenn]

The Moving Finger writes: and, having writ,
Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit
Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line,
Nor all your Tears wash out a Word of it.

[WomenMoveMe]

I have lived a life filled with regret. When younger, I was a menace to society. I drank too much, did every drug I could get my hands on, attempted to love when immaturity prevailed, found myself warming the benches of a jail or two or five, and while it was certainly unintentional, emotionally hurt people along the way. Essentially, I was an idiot.

The good news here, is that, I was young, and I have not been young for a long, long time. We all learn our lessons along the way. Some just don't have as difficult a task as others. Mine were hard-fought and devastatingly masochistic. However, with my self-induced strife, came an assimilation that, continues to stick with me to this day.

So yeah, I suppose that was the long way around saying, yes, I have regret. I have also character and integrity because of it, so I guess not all regret is bad. It shows us what we were, but not who we are.

[msW8ing]

Soooooooooo very well said. :rrose:


I have lived a life filled with regret. When younger, I was a menace to society. I drank too much, did every drug I could get my hands on, attempted to love when immaturity prevailed, found myself warming the benches of a jail or two or five, and while it was certainly unintentional, emotionally hurt people along the way. Essentially, I was an idiot.

The good news here, is that, I was young, and I have not been young for a long, long time. We all learn our lessons along the way. Some just don't have as difficult a task as others. Mine were hard-fought and devastatingly masochistic. However, with my self-induced strife, came an assimilation that, continues to stick with me to this day.

So yeah, I suppose that was the long way around saying, yes, I have regret. I have also character and integrity because of it, so I guess not all regret is bad. It shows us what we were, but not who we are.

[Deborah]

One regret that stands out in my mind is not having more children. Being married to a bio man it is really a wonder i had any at all, looking back....lol.

But, knowing what i know now, i would have left that relationship way before 17 years of it and would have been artificially inseminated at least a couple of more times.

I would have loved to have had a girl, but even if i had continued to have boys, i enjoyed being pregnant and i loved raising children. It is very hard for me to know i am too old to do this anymore and honestly it has been a very painful acceptance.

If i had to do over, i would definitely had more children, probably had a house full. :)

Belle, I pray one day you will have grandchildren....mine have been the joy of my life. My son is and always will be everything to me but we're young and struggling when we have our children (usually) it's so special with the grandchildren..its one of the best parts of having children.

[Tuff Stuff]

Yes,I had regrets,but don't worry..

Karma has taught me a thousand times greater that 'what goes around,comes around'.

Some rules aren't meant to be broken.

My debt has been Paid In Full. :missu:

[girl_dee]

at this point, yes i do.

It’s a very tricky task going through life hoping you won’t do things, (or not do things) that will cause regret later on.

The thing about regret is it’s all hindsight.

[clay]

Of course, I do. I believe that is just the nature of being a human.

Sometimes decisions are made and I may not be thinking clearly. But regardless, I made them, so I own them & stand by them.

As dee says, it is usually in hindsight one realizes that a decision made might not have been a wise one...but made anyway.

I learn this way...as I am a mere human....wrought with frailities.

[TL1]

Yes quite a few...........

Some of them I have learned from

Some I was clearly out of my mind!

But I choose not to dwell on them and aim to not have them (or as few as possible) in the future.

[girl_dee]

Yes quite a few...........

Some of them I have learned from

Some I was clearly out of my mind!

But I choose not to dwell on them and aim to not have them (or as few as possible) in the future.

i totally get “was out of my mind"

[charley]

Because I have lived a life of right action (since the age of 19) - instead of choice - real/true meditation has become a way of life for me, with the following side-effects:
the various siddhis, which seem trivial compared with the following treasures:
peace of mind (pacem in terris, there can never be peace on earth until there is peace of mind within)
dispassionate indifference (because of insight meditation, there was the seeing that one was the ground of all humanity, and as the ground is indifferent to one’s likes and dislikes, one is this indifference - absolutely wonderful); so one can and has said, it's your life, not mine!
confidence
surety (a feeling of complete and utter psychological security) - when one starts off with certainty, one ends up in confusion, better to start off with uncertainty and live that way, until one comes to meditation
psychological freedom - not feeling like a puppet on the strings of some past event of one's life (hereditary or otherwise)
discernment
enhanced sensitivity
there has even been some physical healing of some minor physical problems

having one's own mind - the greatest blessing of all

"meditation as a way of life, a journey through life;
meditation is life, meditation is the final act of a life of truth - the whole of one’s life
when one dedicates one’s whole life to meditation, then life consecrates all of its attention to one’s life - in other words, life takes care of one
without meditation, one is just surviving, because life is meditation
a life that is not lived in meditation is not worth living"
(from the book I am writing)

so with all these, one faces with the last third of one's life, and looks out quietly at the madness and horror around one

so, no, no regrets at all

would be wonderful if all could have these treasures, but they are not to be found on the dark side

[~ocean]

aurqCBAqUBI

[Signmypapyrus]

I regret if my words or actions hurt another person, that's true. But whatever I've done has taught me something, so I try not to regret. If I chose differently, I wouldn't have the same friends (or family) as I do now.

I've made mistakes, but I've also had great experiences, and it's been quite a ride.

This is really well put, thank you.

The band The Oh Hellos have a great song about the matter of regrets:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=czFgKa7YcIQ

[Tuff Stuff]

Yes,I had regrets,but don't worry..

Karma has taught me a thousand times greater that 'what goes around,comes around'.

Some rules aren't meant to be broken.

My debt has been Paid In Full. :missu:


Some days I feel like I'm still paying .*snort*

:getout:

[JDeere]

Yes a ton of regrets but too many to list as well!